The Probability Factor
by jesuiscanadien
Summary: The tables are turned as Haldir is tossed into present day Earth. A journey of discovery and more discovery. Haldir OFC and a cast of originals. Disclaimer Haldir et al belongs to Tolkien, the OC's are mine. No profiteering from this story. AU, NOT CA
1. Chapter 1

The Probability Factor

Chapter One- Doncha Hate It When That Happens?

Have you ever felt like the other shoe was going to drop sometime soon, and it was going to be a doozy? I had been feeling like that for a whole week, and the suspense was killing me.

My week from suspense hell had occurred during some of the best summer weather Vancouver had seen in a while. Near the end of that week I had left my office for lunch to walk around the Vancouver Art Gallery. I was trying to catch some rays to offset the pasty white office-worker skin I had accumulated over the winter. Tanning was hard at my age. The rich golden brown of my youth was no longer a possibility. Instead I had to settle for a light camel colour and use bronzer for my face, which almost never tanned, except for my nose which would get a ruddy colour from sun exposure. A light breeze played with the hair that escaped from the barrette holding my curls back off my face. I peered through my sunglasses watching other people out enjoying the sun, the pigeons fluttering around on the sidewalk, and traffic ebbing and surging out on the street.

Letting my mind wander, I still felt the exhaustion from the poor sleep I'd been having. I'd been having trouble sleeping for about a week, having these odd reoccurring dreams that I simply could not figure out. When I woke up, I'd remember bits and pieces, and I'd write them down to examine them later. Every night the same dream, and the next morning I'd remember a little more and write it down. Today was day six and I had the complete dream written down in my little notebook. I had been examining it on my breaks and was mulling it over on my lunch, but I couldn't make heads or tails of it.

The dream had me either being chased or running to something. I wasn't too sure as I couldn't tell if something was following me, but I felt a sense of urgency, ergo the running. I kept running down Howe Street north towards the water, but before I could get there, I'd wake up. Every night the same thing, the running and then I'd wake up. I just couldn't figure out why I was having these dreams, or why they started so suddenly. I hadn't had any recent changes to my life. My job certainly wasn't an issue. It was the same old boring j-o-b I'd had for the last seven years. My West End apartment had been my shelter and sanity for the last twelve, and I hadn't had any recent additions or subtractions to my social life. I had broken up with my lousy cheating ex-boyfriend over nine months ago and hadn't been out on a date since. It was perplexing to say the least.

My lunch had ended and no new understanding of my affliction had been achieved. I walked back to the office and made my way back to my cubicle. Meg, my co-worker, dropped by my desk to chat as soon as I sat down.

"Hey Susan, didjya go to the Mall at lunch?" she asked.

I shook my head no, "Uh-uh. I was out for a walk to catch some sun."

"Oh," she curled herself over the baffle wall, "Well, I was in Holt Renfrew today, and you'll never guess what I saw."

"Uh-huh. What?" I played along so she would get to the point and I could get back to work.

"Greg. Cooing over his new tartlet, Kimmy whatshername. I was floored. Couldn't believe he'd be so blatant. What an ass," she pronounced scornfully.

"Meg, we broke up over nine months ago. I'm over him. If he wants to publicly copulate with his new girlfriend, I couldn't care less," I sighed.

Meg patted my back reassuringly, "I know, I know. But still. He's an ass."

"No debate there," I agreed, "But I'd rather not know what he's up to. It's just creepy, y'know?"

She nodded, "Okay, okay. I understand. No more talking about Greg the ass. Only happy talk from now on. I promise. You know I'm here for you right?"

"Yes I do," I conceded.

"Then know I will do everything in my power to see you happy again," she pronounced.

"You don't need to Meg. I'm fine. I am happy. Don't worry about me," I answered.

Meg was a good egg. She had seen me through my messy break-up and had taken me out for weeks afterwards to keep me from moping around in my apartment; but I couldn't stand the fact that she now claimed ownership over me in a small way. She was of a mind that only a man in your life could make you happy, and had been trying for months to get me to go out and start dating again. I wasn't ready to put my shredded heart through that pain again, so I refused. I needed time to learn how to trust again, and being forced out on dates wasn't the way to make that happen. I had a huge need to have her back off and leave me some breathing room.

Meg held up her hands in mock surrender, "All right, all right. But if you need anything, you let me know." She turned and walked back to her desk.

I felt faintly relieved that she had given up so easily, but knew that given any opportunity, she'd be back full force. I turned back to my work, hoping to get a Ministerial Enquiry off my desk before the end of the day. Our office had received a complaint on the processing of a Residential Schools claim, and the Minister of Indian and Northern Affairs had been dragged in when the claimant felt we weren't moving quickly enough. It wasn't that we were dragging our feet; we just had to sort through thousands of documents that had been received over the course of a decade in order to find the relevant ones for the claimant's case. We still had not managed to get all of the documents pertaining to the Residential Schools debacle on Imaging, but we were getting there. Over the last year we had a team in each region solely working on adding every single document to the Rainbow Imaging system, but we had only managed to make a dent in the massive amount of paper we had in our archives. Plus, we were getting new documents in every day. It was a nightmare.

The Minister feared poor publicity as his political party had been coming under quite a bit of heat for some scandals that had occurred under the previous Prime Minister, and he didn't want his Department added to the political crisis. I had to explain exactly where we were in the course of the investigation and give an approximate timeline as to when the claimant could expect a resolution to his concern.

I worked feverishly for a few hours before I managed to complete the Enquiry and I sent it off in the bag mail to Ottawa. Upon leaving the office, I felt a sense of both relief and freedom. While I liked my job, I found handling Ministerial Enquiries quite stressful, and wondered if I could find a job without that duty.

Walking down Jervis St, I let my body relax and let all the tension I had built up getting the Ministerial Enquiry ready, flow out of my extremities. I heard the traffic noises and the birds chirping in the trees above me, but I ignored it. Instead I let my mind go blank as I used my commute home to de-stress. I turned onto Comox and sped up my pace as I walked down the hill deep into the West End. My building was on Chilco near Comox, and I looked forward to taking my dog Roxy out for a walk in Stanley Park when I got home. Just as I crossed Denman, I heard a loud crash and shouting off to my left. I turned to look and saw a man jumping out of his car, which had crashed into a newspaper box, waving angrily and swearing at the top of his voice. Another man, who seemed quite tall or the other guy was really short, was standing in the middle of the road looking confused and angry. Now normally I'd just call 911 to report the accident and then go merrily on my way, but something about this scene struck a chord with me, so I wandered over to see if I could help.

As I walked up I heard the tall man speak, but it wasn't a language I recognized. Plus, this guy was dressed like an extra in a medieval picture. Stanley Park sees its fair share of filming, but I knew for a fact that there wasn't a period picture in town at the moment. I have a secret vice. I scan all the film production web-sites and read the entertainment dailies to keep up with the film industry here in Vancouver. I just like to know. And I knew this guy wasn't part of a film production. Unless Stargate SG-1 or Stargate Atlantis was filming a piece that needed medieval costumes, but I seriously doubted it. Medieval guy started to get a hold of himself and took on this imperious attitude, which only infuriated short guy. It was time for some reason to intercede. I cleared my throat.

"Umm, pardon me, but may I be of any assistance? You seem to require some help," I calmly interrupted.

The short guy stopped mid-tirade and looked at me, "Listen lady, unless you have a magic wand to fix my car, you can get lost. This asshole just stepped into the middle of the road and made me crash!"

"I'm sure he didn't make you crash, after all you had other options," I suggested.

He gave me a cruel look, "Yeah, I shoulda hit him. Dumb fuck."

The tall guy flipped his long blond hair over his shoulder and looked at me with a piercing stare. He motioned to me and began to speak in the unknown language. It sounded kind of musical and not unlike a combination of Arabic and Finnish. Not that I understood a word of it. He looked like he was really trying to get something across to me, and for a moment I had a spark of clarity. I believed he wanted to know where he was. I had no idea how I had arrived at this conclusion, it just seemed to arrive. I knew I had to get tall guy out of there, I just had to get short guy to calm down.

"Hey, hey! Sir!" I waved my hand in front of short guy's face as he restarted his tirade.

He paused and glared at me, "What?"

"I'm going to do you a favour and take this guy out of your hair," I replied.

"What about my car?" he demanded.

I looked it over. There was just a small scratch where his fender had connected with the newspaper box. "It's fine. Just take it to ICBC if you want to get that scratch fixed," I said reasonably.

"And have my insurance rates go up?" he bellowed.

"It's either that or have ICBC make a decision on fault. Let's see. Car. Pedestrian. Car almost hits pedestrian. Hmmm, how's that one look, eh?" I looked him squarely in the eye, "What will ICBC decide if our friend Flicka has been injured, eh?"

He stuttered for a second, "But he's not injured."

"How do you know? Are you a doctor? Do you have a job in healthcare? I don't think so. So my suggestion to you is to pipe down, get in your car and go. And thank whatever god you pray to that you got off so damn easy," I gave him a hard look.

He looked at tall guy and then looked at me. Deciding that he was outgunned, he grumbled and got back into his car. I took tall guy's hand and dragged him away from the scene.

"Hey, sir? Come with me. I'll see to your needs," I motioned to him to come with me. He gave me a confused look, but then followed me.

I had no idea what I was doing, taking him to my home, but it felt right. It was like I was on autopilot and following some unknown programming. I walked with him back to my apartment and guided him in the door. When I got to the elevator, we ran into a slight problem. He didn't want to get in. I cajoled and encouraged, but he did not want to get in. I stepped in and let the door close. I heard him yelp and hit the open button to let the doors reopen. He seemed quite relieved to see me in one piece. I pulled him in and the door closed. He seemed to get a bit panicky, and it only got worse when I pressed the sixteenth floor button and the elevator began to rise. I put a calming hand on his arm and made soothing noises, but he still looked quite stricken. When the door finally opened he shot out into the hall. I followed him out and motioned him to come with me as I walked down the hall to my door. I ushered him into my apartment, and watched him cautiously enter and examine my belongings. The feeling that I had, that told me this was the right thing to do, was still strong but I felt like I shouldn't have a strange man in my home. It just wasn't done.

Roxy came peeling out of my bedroom, and ran up to tall guy. She yipped and ran around his feet in excitement. He bent down and she raised herself up on her hind feet to greet him. He ruffled her fur and she licked his hand. That clinched it. Roxy was a good judge of character. She hadn't liked Greg from the get go, and for good reason. I knew if Roxy placed her stamp of approval on tall guy, he must be all right. She wasn't easily fooled. She managed to cement the feeling I had that this guy was all right. I relaxed a little more and petted Roxy in greeting.

Roxy danced around my feet, letting me know it was time to take her out. I looked at tall guy. I couldn't take him with me. It would raise too many eyebrows. So I decided to trust him and keep him in the house. I walked over to the TV and turned it on. The noise startled him and he came up beside me, watching the images jump all over the screen. I turned the channel to CNN and stepped back.

"I've got to take Roxy out for a walk. This is the remote. Don't press this button. It's the volume and I've got neighbours who don't like loud TV's, so don't touch this button. This is the power button, to turn it on and off. There are books over there," I motioned to the bookshelves lining the walls, "Feel free to read if you like. I'll be back in half an hour. Okay?" I waved goodbye and grabbed Roxy's leash and poop bags off the hook by the door and opened it to leave.

Tall guy just looked perplexed as he watched me go. I hoped he wouldn't leave before I got back. I didn't want my apartment left open, and I also didn't want to come back to a panicking guy stuck in the elevator. I figured he must be claustrophobic. It was the only thing I could think of as to why he was so wigged out by the elevator. I left, locking the door behind me and led Roxy out for her walk. I ran her up to the edge of the Park, and cleaned up after she had done her business. Then we briskly walked back to the apartment, cutting her normal walk short because of my paranoia about our houseguest. I got near to my building and then swerved to go up to Denman, to the little menswear store near Comox. I tied Roxy's leash to a bike rack before I went in to find our houseguest some more appropriate clothing. Going over to the clearance rack, I found a pair of soft cotton sweats in what I guessed was his size. I also found a t-shirt and hoodie that were reasonably priced. After I purchased the items, I walked out with my bag and got Roxy, before I continued back to my apartment. Once Roxy and I opened the door, I got her off the leash and she ran over to our guest, only to sit down beside him. He had made himself comfortable on the couch and was watching the TV. The channel had been changed and he was watching PBS' 'Arthur'. It was an odd choice, but I let it slide. I dropped the bag onto the coffee table and sat down beside him.

"Interesting viewing choice," I casually mentioned, nodding towards the TV.

Tall guy just glanced at me and then turned his attention back to the show. I watched him watching the TV for a moment. He had quite long blond hair and these blue-grey eyes that seemed intense in their gaze. Even while watching 'Arthur'. He was a bit scratched up and dirty, but no worse for wear. I noticed he wore a sword on his belt and a pair of short knives stuck out of his knee-high boots. The colours of the forest were predominant in the choice of clothing he wore. I figured he could blend in to the foliage quite easily if he was so inclined. Which brought me to the questions of who he was, and why was he here. I decided to advance my progress in this area, and at least get a name.

I waved my hand in front of his face while I said, "Excuse me. Pardon me?"

He turned to look at me as a slightly annoyed expression crossed his face. Okay, we established he didn't like to be interrupted while watching his program.

"Okay, yeah. This will just take a moment," I smiled my most charming smile, "What's your name?" I pointed to him. "Name? Oh, uh. My name is Susan," I pointed to myself, "Susan. And you are?" I pointed back to him.

He just gave me a blank look. I sighed inwardly, "Susan." I repeated pointing to myself, "Susan. And you are?" I pointed back at him.

A look of dawning understanding flit across his face as he pointed to me, "Su-san." He stumbled over the pronunciation. He pointed to himself, "Hal-dur." He gently rolled his 'r'.

"Haldur," I repeated, pointing at him. "Susan," I pointed back to myself.

Looking terribly pleased with himself, he repeated, "Haldur," rolling the 'r' again, and then pointing to me, "Susan."

"Yes," I clapped my hands happily, "Now for the hard question. Why are you here?"

I lost him again, as he stared at me blankly. "Susan," he responded helpfully.

I tried not to laugh, "Yes, Susan. Very good." I stood up, "Well. I think that takes care of the question and answer session for the evening. I'm gonna start dinner. Stay where you are," I motioned to him to stay seated as I got up and walked into my kitchen.

He stared after me for a moment before he returned his attention back to the television, which was now showing 'Maya & Miguel'. This lost Haldur's interest, so he picked up the remote and pressed the button I showed him, flipping through the channels at a mind-numbing speed. He reminded me of my middle nephew, who couldn't just sit and watch a show, but had to change the channels every five minutes at a machine gun pace. He finally settled on a re-run of 'Oprah', becoming engrossed in the topic of men feeling rejected in the bedroom. Shaking my head at his odd viewing habits; I pulled out the chicken I had marinating in fridge and selected some fresh veggies I had purchased at the market the day before. I had lucked out at the Granville Island market, finding baby asparagus and sweet carrots, as well as peas in the pod. I decided on asparagus and carrots to pair with the chicken, and I would make up rice pilaf as a bed. While I busied myself making dinner, I heard Haldur repeat phrases he heard on the TV. I just about sliced my finger open when I heard him repeat, "I have needs she just doesn't understand." I laughed quietly in the kitchen, trying not to be heard as I finished putting the chicken in the oven and turning on the steamer for the rice and vegetables.

Pulling a couple of bottled waters out of the fridge, I walked back into the living room, uncapping them as I went. Haldur was sitting on the couch, raptly watching Oprah giving her vaunted opinion to the masses. I handed an open bottle to Haldur, and took a sip from my own. Haldur watched me drink and then took a tentative sip from his own bottle. Some water dribbled down his chin as he got the hang of drinking from a bottle. Peculiar. I wondered if there were bottles where he came from. He was handling this marvellously, if he wasn't local. Come to think of it, I was pretty calm about the whole thing too. It was a little odd. Not that I'm a panicky person anyways. I'm good in a crisis and remain calm under some pretty dire circumstances, but then I couldn't really say if I would handle being alone in a strange land all that well. Especially if it wasn't my idea. It gave me something else to mull over, besides where my guest was from, why he was here, and why the hell I was having these repetitive dreams.

Dinner soon buzzed readiness, and I pulled the chicken out of the oven and spooned rice onto the plates, placing the chicken on top. Arranging the vegetables, I then picked up the plates and brought them to the dining table. I moved back into the kitchen to get the cutlery and drinks, and motioned to Haldur to come eat. He seemed grateful for the meal, and ate everything up, cleaning his plate in good speed. I offered another helping, and watched him comprehend my offer. He quickly nodded, and I got up to get him another plate. He made short work of that one too. So much for leftovers for lunch tomorrow.

The evening was quiet, as my guest didn't have much to say. Well, nothing that I understood at any rate. I took Roxy out for her evening constitutional and came back to Haldur reclining on the couch staring into nothingness. The closing of the door startled him into the present, and he leapt off the couch, crouching in a battle stance. Seeing it was only me and Roxy, he settled back down on the couch. I got Roxy calmed down and myself ready for bed. I felt awkward padding out into the living room in my PJ's, but I had to give him bedding for the night. I found him sprawled out on the couch, pillows on the floor and boots lying neatly beside the foot of the couch. I gently pulled a blanket over him, turned down the A/C and flicked off the lights before I left the room. I mentally went over the grocery list for the next day as I fell asleep. Toothbrush. Haldur would definitely need a toothbrush. I fell asleep to dreams of dental hygiene.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two-When the Hell is Friday?

I was dreaming again. Running like a bat out of hell down Howe Street, my eyes searching wildly for something I couldn't see. I felt a great sense of panic as I drew closer to the waterfront. Suddenly I saw a blond figure in the distance. It was Haldur, or at least it looked like him. His hair had been shortened and he was wearing regular street clothes, but as I came closer I could recognize his features. I started waving madly, trying to yell out, but to no avail. My voice didn't work. Haldur gave me a sad look and turning, he suddenly disappeared. My body jolted awake just as he vanished.

Sitting up in my bed, I panted from the imaginary exertion of my dream. As soon as my eyes were able to focus, I saw Haldur sitting at the edge of my bed. I let out a little yelp of surprise, before the memory of rescuing him from the irate driver and taking him to my home flooded back. What on earth was I thinking, taking home a complete stranger? This obvious lunatic was now sitting in my bedroom, watching me sleep. Who does that? Sickos, that's who, and I had one of them sitting in front of me with a deeply intense look on his face. Just then Roxy chose to jump up onto the bed and lay her head down on his knee, daring me to challenge her judgement. I sighed. She was right. I still had the feeling he was okay and I was supposed to have him here and Roxy hadn't changed her mind about his character. Resigned to the facts of evidence, I looked him over. He had removed his sword and belt, and his shirt was hanging loosely from his body. The lacing that kept his shirt closed had been untied and I saw a long expanse of bare chest. It struck me odd that he didn't have any chest hair, and I wanted to have a closer look, but I stayed back. It would've been impolite to try and get see the rest of his chest. We'd been sitting there, staring at each other for several minutes, so I decided to get the conversation going, even though it would be one-sided.

"Good morning Haldur. Did you sleep well?" I slid across my bed to get out on the other side. I didn't want to be too close to him and have him get a whiff of my morning breath.

Haldur just gave me a blank look. Roxy yipped and I got up to go get her breakfast. Yawning, I dragged my ass down the hall to the bathroom to make a morning pit-stop. Haldur followed me closely, slightly wigging me out with his proximity. I walked into my small bathroom and turned on the tap to brush my teeth, in order to get rid of my morning mouth. I picked up my toothbrush only to be stopped by a hand holding my wrist. I looked at Haldur, who was waaay to close for comfort. He towered over me, making me estimate that he was well over 6'5". He gave a questioning look towards my toothbrush.

"It's a toothbrush," he looked quizzical and I reiterated, "A toothbrush. You brush your teeth with it, see?" I put some toothpaste on the brush and stuck it in my mouth. Brushing my top teeth thoroughly, I spoke through the foam, "It's a part of good dental hygiene. Twice a day, maybe three times for cavity prevention and general good mouth health." I finished brushing my teeth and spit out the foam, rinsing my mouth with a glass of water. "All done. See? Clean teeth. Now get out of my bathroom," I shooed him out the door, "I have to use the loo." I shut the door and locked it, to ensure no untimely surprise visits, and went about my business. I guess the flushing sound alerted him to my being finished, because he knocked on the door, making Roxy bark.

"Hang on, hang on. I'll be out in a minute." I washed my hands, dried them thoroughly and then opened the door. He was standing there with a strained look on his face. Something triggered inside me. Bathroom. I hadn't heard any flushing this morning, and my toilet is loud. Plus, it runs if you don't hold the handle down until it finishes flushing. His distressed look and my presence in the bathroom equalled an epiphany. "You need to use the toilet? Oh my god. You didn't have to wait for me to get up. Go ahead," I moved out of the way, "Please, be my guest. Just wait for the toilet to finish working before you let go of the handle." He wandered in, clearly looking for something but not seeing it. "The toilet's here," I lifted the lid, "If you have to pee, lift the seat up," I demonstrated, "and if you have to do the other, put the seat down and sit. Make sure you hold the handle down until it finishes flushing." I flushed the toilet, making sure he was watching, and lifted the handle when the water finished running. "All right? I'll leave you to it," I walked out, closing the door behind me.

I moved down the hall a ways, so I wouldn't be rude and listen to him, but close enough so that I could help him if he needed it. I couldn't figure him out. He didn't speak the language, showed up in weird clothing, was afraid of elevators and didn't know how to use the toilet. Just where was he from anyway? I had never in my entire life encountered anyone who had not used, let alone seen a toilet before. Plus, he looked so damned surprised when I turned on the tap to brush my teeth and when I flushed the toilet. Had he never seen running water before? How on earth did he get all the way to Vancouver without using a toilet or turning on a tap? I heard a muffled word and then my name being called.

"Susan, Susan," Haldur called from inside the bathroom.

I opened the door, to see him lacing up his pants, standing over the toilet. It hadn't been flushed yet. I walked over to him and took his hand, placing it on the handle. "Hold this down," I pushed it down, "and wait for the water to stop." Once the water finished, I took his hand off the handle and moved him over to the sink. "Turn on the water," I turned on the tap, "and wash your hands with soap." I squeezed a little soap from the dispenser onto his hands. Like I was teaching a child how to wash their hands, I lathered him up and then placed his hands under the water to rinse, making sure I got between his fingers and got the soapy residue off his wrists. I then took a towel from the rack and dried his hands thoroughly, "Then make sure your hands are dried completely." I put the towel back on the rack. "All done," I declared, walking out of the small room. "Would you like some breakfast? Oddly enough I have time to eat this morning, mostly due to you waking me up early. Whaddya want? Eggs? Don't have any of those, havta put them on my grocery list. I can make up some toast. You like rye? I have loads of rye. Got it the day before yesterday, so it's still fresh." I wandered into the kitchen, pulling the toaster out of the cupboard. Pulling the rye bread out of the bread box, I put four slices in and pressed the button down. I don't drink coffee, and thus have none in my home, so I called out, "Sorry, but I haven't any coffee. Would you care for some juice instead?"

Not hearing a response, I poured two glasses of orange juice and put them out on the table. When the toast was ready, I lightly buttered the slices and put two slices on each plate. I got out the marmalade and the raspberry preserves and took them out to the table with the toast. Haldur had already seated himself and was taking a sip of the juice. A look came over him, and I wondered if he had ever had orange juice before. The situation was getting more and more strange. He ate the toast quickly, once I had spread a little marmalade over a piece and handed it to him. He took the knife to spread more on the other piece. I watched him curiously, but couldn't get a handle on his behaviour. When I finished, I took my plate and glass to the sink. With him gathering up his dishware, following close at my heels. I washed up the breakfast dishes and put them in the rack to dry. Haldur watched every move I made very carefully, like he was making note of all my movements.

I turned to face him, "I have to get ready for work. Stay here." I walked back to my bedroom and closed the door, shoving a chair under the knob to prevent any entrance.

I dressed quickly and opened the door to find him standing outside. "I have to go to work now. You can watch TV, read, whatever. But don't leave the apartment. I don't have an extra set of keys for you, and I don't want to get robbed if you leave my place. So stay inside, and I'll figure out something when I get home." I walked down the hall to grab Roxy's leash and bags, so I could take her on a quick morning walk. "Stay here. I'm just taking Roxy out for a minute." I turned on the TV for him and waved him over to the couch. I snapped her leash on and took my excited dog out of the apartment.

I only took Roxy around the block, to make sure she'd be okay for the day; but when I came back, Haldur was standing in my living room half undressed, holding the t-shirt I had purchased for him the day before. He was right in front of the windows, giving anyone who cared to look, a full view of his naked chest and his pants undone, and hanging off his hips. I nearly freaked out, shutting the door with a thud and leaving Roxy by the door, to run over to the windows and close the curtains. Haldur just stood there, watching me implacably. It was unnerving, even though he was the one without the clothes. He made me feel terribly self conscious as I put the room into a dim ambient light. Roxy wandered into the room, dragging her leash behind her.

"Oh, I'm sorry Roxy. Lemme take your leash off," I unclipped her leash and stood up to face the intimidating man before me, "And you. I cannot believe you. Exposing yourself like that. Are you nuts? There are people," I waved my hand around, "living all around us. You can't just strip down in front of a window any time you feel like it. It causes unwanted attention." I grabbed his dirty shirt off the couch and wandered down the hall continuing my lecture. "I want you to put your dirty clothes in the laundry basket, here. It's just inside the hall closet. I'm going to do a load tonight, but that doesn't mean you should prance around in that getup. Seriously. It's bad enough you almost got into an accident, but wearing this Robin Hood gear just takes the cake. Who do you think you are anyway?" I chucked his shirt into the laundry basket, only to turn around and find out he had taken off his pants and was holding them out to me. He still hadn't put on his shirt, so I got an amazing eyeful and then some. With a sharp intake of breath, I grabbed his pants and tossed them into the basket, shutting the closet door. Keeping my eyes carefully trained on anything but his body, I marched back into the living room and handed him the sweat pants that were laid out on the couch. "Put these on please. I can't be expected to leave knowing you are wandering around in all your glory. People could come knocking, and just how the hell would I explain that?"

He had the nerve to look amused as I turned to face the door. After a minute he walked into my field of vision, sweatpants hanging low off his hips and t-shirt hugging his sinewy chest. It occurred to me that he was a candidate for the large size, his previous outfit having disguised his musculature. I grabbed the strings hanging outside his waistband and tightened them so his pants wouldn't be in such a precarious position. I looked up to see him smiling down at me. I believe he enjoyed this, and I quickly backed away. Straightening myself up, I grabbed Roxy's leash off the coffee table and picked up my bag from the corner of the hallway entrance. I hung the leash up and opened the door, giving Roxy a goodbye pat.

"Stay inside," I cautioned, "You mustn't go out. Not until I get some things figured out."

He looked at me uncomprehendingly, so I shooed him back to the still-on television, and bade him to sit on the couch. "Stay here. Do not leave. I will be back in nine hours." I walked back over to the door. "There is food in the fridge if you are hungry. Don't eat me out of house and home," I warned.

I walked out of my apartment, with a sense of apprehension weighing in my heart. Haldur was a puzzle I wasn't sure I could solve. I hoped I would get some clue as to what he was doing here and where he was from soon. He was proving to be somewhat problematic.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three-Guess Who's Coming to Dinner?

Work passed slowly. Slower than humanly possible. No matter how busy I got, the minutes moved with the speed of rather coagulated molasses. I was worried about my houseguest being alone in my home. Or to be more specific, worried about what state my home could be in upon my return. If this guy hadn't seen running water before, could I trust him to actually find the refrigerator? Would he empty my freezer and allow everything to thaw? I had fresh strawberries that my sister-in-law and I had picked out in Langley at the end of June. Plus, I managed to get a hold of some beautiful boysenberries that had just come into season about a week ago. My brother had just come back from his annual trip to the Okanagan and had dropped off a crate of peaches and two lovely boxes of boysenberries and cherries. He was thoughtful enough to include some Rainier cherries, which he knew were my favourite. I hoped Haldur hadn't gone searching for food and thawed my lovely berries. I kept a few for eating as snacks in the fridge, but had frozen most for pies, muffins and preserves. I was just running out of my raspberry preserves and wanted to make more when I had a moment. An urgent prayer to god was given as I hoped I wouldn't find a disaster when I arrived home.

The time to leave had finally arrived and I shot out of my office as though I were on fire. As I passed the SportMart on Thurlow, I remembered the issue with Haldur's t-shirt. I didn't want to delay getting home, but I couldn't very well let him out of the house with a t-shirt that screamed gay-dancer boy. I dashed in and grabbed a Billabong short sleeved't' in a 'large'. It looked big enough, so I took it to the cashier, grabbing a pair of flip-flops on the way. I took a chance and grabbed a 'large' there too. From what I had seen earlier that day, I thought it wouldn't be too much of a stretch to get a 'large' for his feet. See if the myth panned out. I paid for the items and then took off out of the store, making as quickly as I could for home. Visions of disaster flooded my mind as I walked quickly down Robson. A #5 Robson bus came trundling down the road, and I jumped on it to speed up my commute home. The bus shaved fifteen minutes off my usual walking time home, and I hoped it wasn't in vain.

I got off the bus at Comox and ran to my building, just about crashing into someone as I ran. I stopped to apologize, and realized I had bashed into my friend Alistair. He stood before me, shock of orange hair all askew, pale blue eyes and skin the colour of copy paper, if you also included a generous smattering of orange freckles. His long fingers clasped my arm as he smiled at me.

"Susan, it's so good to run in to you here. I was hoping to see you today," he rattled off eagerly. He pranced beside me like some roly-poly puppy.

"Uh-huh Alistair. What's up?" I carelessly asked.

Alistair bounded around me, "I've met someone glorious," he gleefully announced, "Someone so divine, I may have to give up my carefree existence." Alistair did a little dance on the sidewalk to prove his point.

"All right, I'll bite. Who's so divine that you'd cease being a boy on the prowl?" I continued walking to my apartment.

Alistair jumped into the elevator to go up with me to my place, and I suddenly got nervous. I didn't really want Alistair to see my guest. Not that I didn't trust Alistair, he was entirely trustworthy. I just hadn't been able to acclimatize Haldur to anything yet, and I still needed to figure out his situation. Alistair is a bit of a force of nature, and I wasn't sure if Haldur could withstand such an onslaught.

Alistair kept chatting merrily all the way to my door. "Well, his name is Steven, and he's built like a Greek god. Totally delicious. My blond god. Can you imagine?" he chattered on.

"Uh, yeah. Greek god. Sounds fabulous," I was a bit distracted when I opened the door. I peeked inside.

"Why are you standing there? Get in!" Alistair pushed past me, "I need a drink. Oh wait a minute, you don't drink. Blast it all to hell! You don't drink, you don't have mindless sex with strangers, what do you do?" He stopped dead in his tracks, exhaling suddenly. "WHO is this?" he exclaimed.

I moved into my apartment with trepidation and shut the door behind me. Alistair was standing in the middle of my living room staring at a very tall, very angry Haldur.

I held up my hands in surrender, "Haldur, he's okay. This is Alistair. Alistair. My friend," I grabbed Alistair by the hand and shook it. "Friend," I emphasized.

Haldur looked from me to Alistair and back again. I smiled and nodded, "Yes, friend."

Alistair took all of this in with an inquisitive look, "Oookay. Who's this Susie Q?" He slipped his arm through mine.

"Uh, Alistair, this is Haldur. Haldur, this is Alistair. Haldur is visiting me from…" I had to think quickly, "Norway. He's from the northern part of Norway." I gave Haldur a meaningful look. He just stared at me.

Alistair gave me a hard look, "Uh-huh. Norway." He eyeballed me carefully and then looked at Haldur, "Well, he looks Norwegian." Alistair put his hand on his hip and tilted it to the side, "Does he speak English?"

"No," I firmly replied, "He's here to learn."

"And where does he sleep?" Alistair continued unperturbed.

"Oh the couch," I countered.

"Well, that's not entirely comfortable is it? Wouldn't he be more comfortable in a soft bed? Like yours?" The innuendo was not lost on me.

"He's fine on the couch," I said resolutely.

Alistair smirked, "Oh honey, you've got a tall cool drink of water like that sleeping on your couch, and you say he's fine? What about you? Are you fine?"

I sighed, "He's fine on the couch."

Alistair shrugged casually, "Just sayin'." He waved his hand towards the couch.

"I can see that. He's fine on the couch," I walked over to the coffee table and put the shopping bag down on it, and then wandered over to the hall entrance, dropping my bag on the floor.

Roxy bounded out of my room, eagerly running around my heels; making it known she wanted her walk. I looked at Haldur and waved for him to sit as I got Roxy's leash off its hook. I gave Alistair a stern look.

"C'mon. Let's take Roxy out for her afternoon constitutional," I grabbed Alistair's wrist after I clipped Roxy's leash on her collar, and he made a consternated sound.

"No! I want to stay and get to know your guest," he protested as I dragged him out the door, "What if he's gay? Shouldn't a boy get that information right off the bat? He could be my great love!"

I snorted, "And what about Steve? I thought he was the one who could make you change your slutty ways." Roxy danced around Alistair's heels as I dragged him onto the elevator.

"If that hunk of burnin' love is gay, then who the fuck is Steve?" Alistair licked his lips in a lascivious manner and I swatted him.

"Ewww. What if he's straight?" I asked with a serious face.

"Oh baby, don't blow my dream just yet. He's too yummy to be straight. Only boys can appreciate that kind of beauty. Just look at you. You've had him tucked away in your apartment for god knows how long, and you obviously haven't shagged him yet! What is wrong with you?" Alistair shook my free arm.

"What makes you think I haven't?" I asked innocently.

"Oh please, if you had slept with him, I seriously doubt you'd have gotten out of bed. You'd have fucked him senseless," Alistair considered his answer for a moment, "Hold up. I'd still be in bed shagging him delicious. You'd be cleaning your apartment and wondering if your Depo held up."

I choked back a laugh, "Shut up bitch. To be quite blunt, I am not of a mind to be sexually assaulting a guest. Especially one who doesn't understand English. It is clearly unfair and doesn't take the guest's feelings into consideration."

"Susie baby, I am most assuredly positive that he wouldn't mind your soft attentions. That is if he doesn't care for mine," he giggled, "But you aren't exactly the type to bed a guy, no matter how cute he is. It's so sad." He frowned and hugged me, "But I don't love you any less."

"Oh thanks Al," I said drily, "You're wrong about not sleeping with a cute guy. I've done it in the past. Plus I have just recently broken off a relationship and am not ready to explore another one."

It was Alistair's turn to snort, "That was over nine months ago. You are the only woman I know who spends a year in mourning before you'll even consider going on a date again."

"I like to observe proper tradition," I defended. Who was I kidding? Alistair may have been the world's biggest queen, but he also knew me inside and out. He knew I was avoiding dating, and he knew why.

When I was nineteen, I was serious about this guy named Rick. We'd been dating all through high school, and it was expected we'd get married after college. I thought we were happy. He paid me attention, and seemed to put me at the top of his list. At least that was the impression I had, until I came by his dorm room at SFU one afternoon unannounced. I opened the door to his bedroom, only to find him on top of a naked freshman, screwing her with apparent gusto. I guess I gasped pretty loud, as he jumped off of her, protesting his innocence. It was rather distracting, what with his penis bouncing around with every movement he made, so I beat a hasty retreat. I avoided his calls, threw out all the flowers he sent me, and basically told him to sod off when he managed to track me down after class at UBC. I suppose the commute between Burnaby Mountain and Point Grey was too much for him to handle, and he took up with a tartlet. It was a really messy break-up, fuelled by my rage at him screwing around on me so openly. Ever since then, I don't do break-ups very well. It takes me quite a while to trust people with penises. I can laugh and joke around with Alistair because I know he's not going to try and get access to my vagina; but he doesn't like to see me mope. He's tried many times to help me with my trust issue, but I guess I'm a tough nut to crack. My last two boyfriends prior to Greg were mutual break-ups, as we both decided things weren't working and it was better to end it. Greg blew that out of the water, with his cheating, and I didn't know if I'd get out of this mope in less than a decade.

Alistair poked my side as we walked with Roxy, "Penny for your thoughts?"

I sighed, "Just thinking about stuff."

"Greg stuff?" he gently asked.

"And other stuff, yeah," I confirmed.

Alistair took my hand, "It'll all get better. You'll see."

"You always say that, and then it doesn't," I said softly.

"That's because you haven't given things a chance to heal. You hide yourself away, and when you do get involved, you keep too much of yourself tucked away from view. Guys like to know they're dating a human y'know," he chided.

"Yeah, yeah," I cleaned up Roxy's leavings and tossed the bag into a refuse container, "Let's get back to our houseguest. I'm sure he's wondering what happened to me."

Alistair just hugged my side and slipping his arm through mine, walked back to my place with a jaunty swing to his step.

Once we got back into my apartment, I poured Alistair a drink of Nestea and put Roxy's stuff away. I noticed the apartment was clean, just as I had left it in the morning. Checking the fridge, I saw that Haldur had eaten most of my berries and had consumed a couple of peaches from the bowl on the counter. I still had to go grocery shopping, but I also felt that Haldur could've gone a bit stir crazy inside my place all day, so I decided to take him with me. I'd just make a quick stop at the Safeway, make sure I got him a toothbrush and maybe pick up a roast chicken, as it was too hot to cook. Even with my window air-conditioner, I didn't want to overtax things by heating up my place to abnormal levels. It wasn't built to cool an oven. Which is how my place would feel after I had roasted a chicken myself. I walked over to Haldur and motioned him over to my shopping bag. Pulling out the new t-shirt, I held it up to him. It looked like it fit okay, so I motioned for him to put it on.

The minute he took off his shirt, I heard a gasp from Alistair.

"Oh my god! If you don't sleep with him I will!" he exclaimed.

"Al, not helping," I stated bluntly.

"Am I staying for dinner?" he mischievously asked.

"No. Go home," I ordered, "To Steve. I'm sure he'll be missing you."

Alistair laughed and put his glass in my sink, "All right, but tomorrow I want details!" He gathered his things and sashayed out the door.

Haldur walked over to me, wearing his new shirt. I felt relief that it fit properly and that I could take him outside without getting stares or catcalls. I smiled as I looked him over. He looked just like anybody else. Of course there was the matter of his hair. He had long blond hair that made him look like he was a stripper for Chippendales. Not that the majority of the population in the West End would mind. In fact, they'd relish the tall blond wandering through their neighbourhood. I was the one who minded. I'm very low key, and having attention like that made me very uncomfortable. It meant I'd be working overtime to make sure Haldur wasn't being taken advantage of, or getting unwanted advances. But then I didn't know if Haldur was the type to not want that kind of stuff. I really had to get to know him better.

I handed Haldur the flip flops, "Put these on. We've got to go out and get some groceries for dinner."

Haldur looked at the flip flops like they were alien creatures. He had not put his boots back on, which were in severe need of a good cleaning; and his large bare feet peeked out from under the bottoms of his sweats. I bent down, grabbing on of the thongs, and I lifted his foot. Sliding it on, I put his foot back down on the ground. The shoe just fit. I had guessed correctly, and had provided proof for the old adage. Haldur flexed his toes and smiled. Taking the second thong, he slid it onto his other bare foot. He rose up onto his toes and then took a few test steps. Looking over at me, he nodded and smiled.

"Okay, good. Then let's go," I grabbed his wrist and called for Roxy, who had gone back into my bedroom. She came bounding out of my room and ran around both my and Haldur's feet. I clipped her leash on, grabbed my coin purse, keys, and ATM card; and then taking Haldur's hand, led him out the door.

The elevator ride proved interesting once again. I kept stroking Haldur's arm and making soothing noises, but to no avail. He once again jumped off the thing like it was the devil incarnate. I suppressed a laugh and taking his hand again, I led him and Roxy over to the Safeway on Davie. Haldur seemed bewildered when we hit the traffic on Denman, and even more taken aback when we went into the busy grocery store. I held onto him tightly, to prevent him from bolting, and began to regret taking him out of the apartment. Perhaps he was agoraphobic, or maybe he became overwhelmed in crowds. Which again begged the question, what on earth was he doing here?

I quickly purchased the toothbrush and chicken, as well as getting another head of lettuce to make a salad with. I didn't have to drag Haldur home, he just about ran the whole way back. Roxy and I had a bit of a time of it keeping up. Once we got back onto the calm tree lined street where my building was, he calmed down. He seemed to revel in the trees, stopping to touch each one and smile. I desperately needed to get him figured out before something happened that I couldn't fix.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four-Explanations R Us

After our quickie dinner, I sat down with Haldur on the couch. I had pulled out one of the books I kept on hand for my nephews and nieces when they came over. Dr.Seuss' "Green Eggs and Ham" was in order, considering the situation, and I opened the book, prepared to read to Haldur and teach him my language.

"I am Sam," I began. I pointed to the character on the back of the animal, "Sam I am. See? This guy is named Sam."

Haldur looked at the page, "Sam?"

"Yes," pointing to the character, "He is Sam. See the letters? This is an 'S', and that's an 'A', and there's an 'M'. You are Haldur, I am Susan, and he is Sam." I explained.

"Sam," Haldur pointed to the character.

"Yes!" I nodded, "And you are Haldur, and I am Susan."

Haldur nodded and pointed back to the book.

"That Sam-I-am! That Sam-I-am! I do not like that Sam-I-am! See he's quite grumpy," I pointed to the Whovish character, "His face is angry." I frowned, "Angry. See?"

Haldur put his face into a grimace, "Angry?"

"Yeah, but with more grrrr," I explained, growling for effect.

"Grrrr," Haldur copied my sound, "Angry."

"Yes!" I clapped my hands in pleasure, "That's it! Angry!"

Haldur laughed as understanding dawned over his face, "Angry! Grrrr!"

The rest of the evening was spent reading the book, and describing the emotions portrayed. Haldur was an adept student. By the end of the evening, just before I stopped everything to get ready for the next working day, Haldur had grasped the basic emotional range, and I had begun to work on subjective personal pronouns. Haldur had the 'he's, she's, you and I,' down. He was still getting the hang of the 'they and them' concepts. I was pleased and gave him a congratulatory hug. He was startled by the contact, but as he had seen me touch and hug Alistair, I think he understood it.

I never did get to the laundry, but then there was always tomorrow.

The next morning, I awoke to Haldur watching me while I was asleep again. That wigged me out, but until I got through the language barrier, I had no way of discerning his true motives or goals. Haldur wasn't wearing his t-shirt, and his sweats were loose around his hips. Temptation made a cursory appearance and I forced it out with thoughts of the licentious Greg. That's worth a cold shower any day. I got up and locked Haldur out of the bathroom as I had my shower and got ready for the day. When I came out of the bathroom, with wet hair and my terrycloth robe wrapped tightly around my body, Haldur stopped me.

Touching my wet hair, he said, "Susan?"

"My wet hair?" I touched my hair, "Wet. See? Wet hair." I touched Haldur's hair, "Dry. Dry hair. You have dry hair."

Haldur touched my hair, "Wet. I wet." Then he touched himself.

The familiar bell rang, "You want to get wet? I mean you want a shower?" I pointed to the shower I had just gotten out of. "Shower?"

He nodded vigorously, "I wet."

I walked him into the bathroom, taking him to the bathtub shower. Turning on the water, I adjusted it until it was warm. "This is soap. See?" I lathered a drop between my fingers and rinsed them off, "This is shampoo. Use this on your hair," I touched the bottle to his hair, and then grabbed the conditioner; "This is the next step. Conditioner." I began to walk out of the bathroom, before I stopped, remembering the shower curtain, "Close this when you step under the water." I slid the curtain closed, and then left an opening for him to step through. I grabbed a towel off the rack and put it on the toilet seat, "Dry yourself with the towel. Then put it on the hook." I demonstrated what I meant and put the towel back on the seat. I turned and walked out of the bathroom, shutting the door behind me.

I went into my bedroom and got dressed hurriedly, in case Haldur was a quick showerer. I had run out of pants, and wasn't allowed to wear shorts to work, so I donned the only skirt I owned. It was denim Tommy Hilfiger, with a front zip and a front slit. Utterly frustrating to sit down in, as the damned thing would hitch up enormously when I sat down, but it was the only clean thing left in my closet. I pulled on a light Tommy sweater in a deep blue, and adjusted my waistband, trying to make sure my zipper would stay put. I slid into a pair of Easy Spirit loafers and walked out of my bedroom to get breakfast ready and take Roxy out for her morning walk. Haldur had been waking me up so early, that I could've easily read the paper before I left; but was instead using the time to get to work early, get more done, and then leave early. Haldur came out of the bathroom naked, and wandered into the kitchen where I was preparing breakfast. I just about dropped the plate I was holding to put the toast on.

My eyes shot up to the ceiling and I stammered, "Hey! Clothes! Clothes would be good about now. You may be a nudist at home, but here, people have a habit of dressing when they're in mixed company!" I knew Alistair would be kicking me about then, but I just wasn't up to seeing a very good-looking, well-endowed, naked man first thing in the morning. Even when Greg and I lived together, he never walked around naked. It just wasn't done.

Haldur slapped something into my hand and sat down at the dining room table. I looked down and saw a comb; then grabbing a dishcloth, I dropped it on his member so I wouldn't be distracted. I didn't know where Haldur came from, what their traditions were, but he apparently wanted me to comb out his wet hair. I gently began to run the comb through his long hair. Starting at the back, I worked my way forward, being careful not to tug on his hair. It was so long, I wondered if it would dry by the time I got home. As I came around the right side, I pulled up a hank of hair and noticed something that made me gasp in disbelief. Haldur had pointed ears! Not just pointy tips, like I had seen in some people, but genuine pointed ears. Kinda like Spock, only more convincing. I reached out and touched the tips, to make sure I wasn't hallucinating, and was shocked when they felt like normal skin. I stroked the tips, running my fingers around the edges, and suddenly Haldur shuddered and grabbed my hand.

"Susan," he warned in a bit of a breathy voice. He shook his head no, and I withdrew my hand from his clasp.

"Sorry. But you've got pointed ears!" I exclaimed, astounded.

"Edhel. Ellon," he explained.

I had no idea what he was talking about, but figured it was his name for the abnormality. "All right. Edhel, ellon," I repeated, "Whatever. Eat your breakfast," I gestured to the toast already on the table.

Haldur picked up a slice and began to chew on it as I finished his hair. I sat down, stunned by this revelation. Mindlessly eating a piece of toast, I gulped down some juice and then got up to go.

"I'm leaving now. I'll be back in nine hours. Maybe longer. I have to digest this, this…development. I'm just going to take Roxy out quickly, but then I'm gone," I grabbed Roxy's leash, and she jumped up from her spot by Haldur's feet and ran over to me.

Ten minutes later, I was dropping Roxy back inside my place. I turned on the TV for Haldur, and turned it to CNN. Looking over at Haldur, who was still naked and sitting at my table, I groaned inwardly; and grabbed my stuff, rushing out the door. I used the time walking to work to sort out what I had seen that morning. Those ears really confounded me, and I became more determined to teach Haldur English, so I could at least get some semblance of a story.

When I got to work, Meg cornered me, wanting to know why I hadn't shown up for the send-off after work for Cliff, who was retiring. I had completely forgotten about that. I was originally going to drop by, have an iced tea and then go home for dinner, but with my new houseguest, I had dropped everything to get home. I apologized to Meg for missing the shindig, and said I had a houseguest who had just arrived from out of town, that I had to see to. Meg was all persnickety, saying my guest surely had heard of hotels, and I owed my co-workers respect by showing up when they left. I figured Meg had another fight with her boyfriend, as she wasn't usually this nitpicky. I let her rant about the decimation of civilised manners, and booted up my computer. Meg, finally running out steam, left to go back to her desk, leaving me in blessed peace. It was short lived.

The rest of my day was spent putting out minor fires regarding the decision-making process of residential school claims. I was either talking to angry natives, or calming stressed out adjudicators. By quitting time, I had a bit of a migraine starting in my right frontal lobe. I took my Relpax and put on my hat and sunglasses to deal with the bright sunshine on the way home.

As I staggered out into the afternoon glare, I grimaced as pain surged through my head and into my right eye. I walked slowly home, trying to keep my head from exploding with any sudden movement. As I approached Denman, I felt an arm grab me and spin me around. I moaned with the new surge of pain.

"Oooh, sorry baby. You have another headache?" Alistair searched my face with concern in his eyes.

"Yeah," I mumbled, "Take it slow okay. I need to get home and lie down."

"Do you want me to take Roxy out? I can do that and pick you up something for dinner. I don't suppose your houseguest could negotiate the supermarket, hmmm?" he mused, "I mean, having no language skills."

"He does speak a language Alistair. It's just not English," I said softly, trying not to hurt my head any worse.

"Right. How's the English lessons coming?" he patted my back gently.

"Fine. Can we just get home please," my eyes watered involuntarily.

Alistair looked worried as he guided me across Denman and down to my building. He got my keys out of my bag and got us up into my place. When he opened my apartment door, Haldur was waiting, with a very pleased look on his face.

"Susan! Hello!" he proudly pronounced.

I grimaced a smile, "Good for you Haldur. Hello to you too." My head took a moment to throb, and I groaned.

Alistair took charge of the situation. "Susan, go lie down and get some rest. Do you want me to bring you some water?" I groaned in the affirmative. "All right. Then I'll take Roxy out. Haldur, you stay here. Susan is sick," he held his head and grimaced, "Sick. Okay?"

Haldur looked concerned as I made my way back to my bedroom to lie down. I closed the curtains and took off my shoes, stretching out on my bed. Haldur sat down beside me and began to stroke my head, with a concerned look on his face. Alistair came in and put the glass of water on my bedside table, smiling at me, as he dug around in the drawer for my eye mask. Without a word, he handed it to me and left the room. I put it on and lay back against the pillow and let myself drift into a hazy rest; while Haldur continued to rub my head, murmuring something in his native tongue.

I fell deeper into sleep and had this dream where Haldur spoke perfect English. He told me he was an elf and that he had come from a place called Arda. He said he was in the middle of a battle when he was sucked away to my world, and he wasn't sure why. He told me he was sure he knew me, that first day we met, so that is why he went with me when I asked him to. Haldur was sure that I knew him too, but he had no idea why. I told him it could be a case of déjà vu. I had to explain that to him, and he nodded in understanding. He said while he wasn't sure what was going on, he knew he had to stay with me in order to get home. I was apparently the key to him seeing his home again. I asked him how he knew such perfect English in my dream, when in real life he could only speak a few words. Words I had taught him. He explained we were in the dream-state, and that was why we could communicate. He was speaking Sindarin, but I heard English, and vice versa. I asked him why he insisted on showing his body when we were alone. He laughed, explaining that the body is not something they hide where he's from. He said it was not taboo to see a member of the opposite sex nude. The nude form was beautiful and should be celebrated. I agreed, but then explained the societal norms here and why, unless you were intimate with someone, you didn't go around naked. I asked about his ears, as they had me a bit flummoxed. He told me they were a part of his race, the race of elves. He said elves co-existed with the race of men, among other races. I was getting quite tired, so asked if I could rest some more, as my head still ached. He said he would assist with my healing and spoke some words I didn't understand. I fell into a dreamless sleep after that.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter Five-A Kiss is Just a Kiss

I must say, Haldur was a magician. My migraine was completely gone before I woke up; and my evening was spent tutoring him in English lessons. I had scads of other questions I wanted to ask him, but felt that if I waited, perhaps some answers would present themselves. Alistair stuck around for dinner and helped me tutor Haldur by acting out skits to get my points across. I had to laugh as Alistair chose to enact the phrase 'I love you', by grabbing me bodily and place sloppy kisses all over my face. I knew he was kidding around and advised Haldur to ignore that explanation. Alistair made a great fuss about being offended, and I had to placate him with a lemon poppyseed muffin. I had made them the previous weekend when I couldn't sleep. Haldur had wanted to try one too, so I pulled out the container and warmed a couple up in the microwave, making some tea to go with them. The evening ended peacefully and I slept marvellously, no doubt due to Haldur's intervention earlier that day.

The weeks flew by as I divided my time between work and Haldur. It was akin to having two full time jobs. Alistair really came through for me, obtaining a whole bunch of ESL books from his boyfriend. Steve was an ESL instructor at a local language school, and happily lent Alistair textbooks to assist in Haldur's lessons. I had slowly acclimatized him to the streets of Vancouver, and introduced him to the wonderful world of North American shopping malls. He was quite taken aback by the gaggles of girls who followed us around Pacific Centre, giggling everytime he looked their way. I had to explain to him that he was quite handsome and the females of the species twitter at such displays. Needless to say, he found that amusing.

The calendar said Haldur had been with me for six weeks, but it felt like only a few days. Time had flown by, and it was near the middle of August. I was expecting company in a week's time, when my friend June came in from North Carolina. She usually stayed at a hotel in the heart of downtown, near my workplace, so we could hang out afterwards. I'd take a few days off to have an extended weekend, and try and show her more of B.C. On her last visit I had taken her out to Harrison Hot Springs, this time I was hoping to get over to the Island and show her Tofino and Long Beach. We'd probably stop in Ucluelet for a late lunch. How could you drive through a town named Ucluelet and not stop, eh? With Haldur here, plans had to change slightly. I decided to make reservations at the Wickaninnish Inn for the three of us, and hope that Haldur enjoyed the excursion. I figured being that close to old growth forest would make him feel somewhat at home, as he told me in our dream discussions that he lived in a forest of great trees. When I emailed June about my planned excursion, and to tell her we'd have company, she was excited. She emailed me back wanting details about the company, but I told her that when I picked her up from the airport, I'd give her the scoop. June tried to weasel info out of me, but I stood firm and didn't give away any details.

That evening, when I entered my apartment, Haldur was waiting with Roxy on her leash.

"Hello Susan. We should take Roxy out?" he asked, still unsure of his language skills.

"Yeah Haldur. I'll put my bag down, and then we can go," I dropped my bag in the corner and guided Haldur and Roxy out the door.

The air was stiflingly hot, as Vancouver was in the grips of a hot spell. I watched ripples of heat rise up from the sidewalk as I led Roxy down a grassy embankment near the beach. Roxy panted hard, moving slowly down the grass towards the water. Haldur kicked off his flip flops and took the leash from my hand. He waded into the surf, letting Roxy run back and forth in the water. I sat down on a log and watched Haldur clap his hands and chase Roxy through the waves. Once they had both become thoroughly soaked, he led Roxy out of the cold Pacific water and up onto the warm sand of the beach. I jumped away from my dog as she shook off the excess water, laughing as her body jiggled wildly with the movement. Haldur stood watching her implacably, letting himself get more wet than he already was.

I had purchased Haldur a couple of pairs of knee length shorts to get by with in the heat wave, along with a few new t-shirts. I knew that if he stayed into the Fall, I would have to purchase more clothing to ward against the cool, wet weather. I wondered if Haldur had ever worn anything like runners, and figured he could get away with a pair of those and perhaps some casual leather slip-ons. When I had taken him shopping for shorts, he had tried on a pair of jeans, and declared them too rough on his skin. They weren't good jeans, just a pair of store-brand; so I figured if I got him into a pair of Tommy Hilfiger's or Ralph Lauren's, he like jeans more. I have found that the pricier designer jeans are much softer and already broken in.

Taking the now soaking leash, I walked with Haldur and Roxy back home. As soon as we walked through the door, I told Haldur to keep Roxy at the door on the mat, and ran to get a couple of towels from the linen closet. I handed one to Haldur and began to rub Roxy dry. Haldur stripped off his clothing, leaving it in a wet pile by the door, and wrapping the towel around his waist, walked to the bathroom, closing the door behind him. We had come to an agreement that Haldur would no longer walk around nude and I would not protest his watching me sleep. He said he felt comfortable watching me, as it made him feel secure and more at home. We had not discussed his return home, as I didn't know what to say or do in that regard. Haldur only brought up his home when it was in reference to an issue being dealt with here.

I heard the water for the shower go on, and sighed inwardly. While I liked having a guy around, it seemed like Haldur was just here, existing, not bothering to try and fit in. He had been out quite a bit with Alistair and me, but he stood out like a sore thumb. I had tried to talk him into a haircut, but he would hear none of it. Having a guy who was at least 6'5", with long silvery blond hair and a haughty attitude was not the formula for keeping a low profile. Quite a few of Alistair's friends had asked who Haldur was and if he was available. One, who had an obscene amount of body hair, had aggressively made a pass at Haldur, which he brushed off with an air of disdain. That just made hairy-guy more interested, which meant Alistair had to make it very clear that Haldur was hetero, and in a relationship with me. Hairy-guy gave me the evil-eye and stalked off, muttering about fag-hags and how society had degenerated into a very bad scene. I wondered if Haldur would ever see his home again, and decided that he and I needed to have a talk about his continued existence here and lack of assimilation. Knowing the language didn't count. He was being purported as coming from Scandinavia, but most Europeans were happy to adapt to North American culture. Haldur still disappeared into the trees whenever we went for walks in Stanley Park, and was full of hubris when around other people. He needed another chat about being friendly to the locals. The only person he had warmed up to was me; even with Alistair, he kept an air of aloofness.

The water had been shut off and a few minutes later Haldur came out into the living room to get a fresh shirt and clean pair of shorts. I turned my head as he pulled on the shorts and watched as he crossed my field of vision to walk into the kitchen.

As he pulled out a bottle of water from the fridge, he called out, "Susan, you like some water?"

"Yes please," I answered.

Haldur came back into the living room and handed me a cold bottle, before he sat down on the couch beside me. Roxy settled down on her dog bed beside the couch, and I turned my body to face him.

"Uh Haldur, you've been here for six weeks, and I think it's time to start acting less aloof and more friendly with the locals," I announced.

Haldur studied me for a moment, "Susan, I do not like them. I like you. They too…" he paused looking for the right word, "stupid."

While he wasn't that far off in his assessment, I knew he wasn't giving people enough of a fair shake. Not everyone was stupid, and I regretted teaching him that word.

"Haldur, not everyone is stupid. You need to make more friends, and join in more. I cannot be your only friend here. What if something happens to me? You will need others to help you here," I explained.

Haldur shook his head vehemently, "No. I protect you. You are my friend. Alistair nice, but he looks at me like he hungry. I do not like. You are with…honour. You are great lady." Haldur placed his hand on my knee as he nodded at his words.

"Oh, no I'm not. I just lucked into helping you out. You could've been helped by any number of people," I sighed.

"No. They let me stay in their home? They give me clothes and food? No. I know you. Before I come here, I know you. I see you before. I would not go with you if I not know you," he patted my knee.

"Haldur, you could be stuck here for months, even years. I need you to be nice to people. Please?" I took his hand in mine and held it to my chest.

Haldur watched my movements, and stared at his hand in mine. I brought his hand to my cheek and pressed it against my skin.

"Please?" I repeated.

Haldur leaned forward, coming close to my face, "For you, I try."

"Do better than try. Be nice," I challenged.

He was now so close I could feel his breath on my skin, and it left tiny goosebumps in its wake.

"For you, I will," he amended.

"Thank you," I kissed his hand and gave it back to him.

He looked startled as he sat back. "You kiss me," he said slowly.

"Oh, is that all right? I mean, I didn't overstep any boundaries, did I?" I became slightly flustered.

Haldur looked into my eyes and exhaled, "It is good. I never touch you like that."

"Uh, no. That was a friendly kiss. People exchange them when they are close to the other person. It is usually done with friends and family," I quickly explained. I hoped I hadn't offended Haldur with such a bold movement.

He watched me for some time before he spoke. "Me kiss you?" he asked.

"Uh, all right," I felt like some awkward teenager as he leaned in.

I thought he was just going to kiss my cheek, something completely platonic and without any romantic overtures. He had never expressed any interest in me that way, and I felt more comfortable knowing I didn't have to worry about that. As his faced loomed closer, I felt a surge of panic hit me, as I realized he was really going to kiss me. Not just a friendly peck on the cheek, but a real lip-lock. His lips touched mine, and I felt an electric shock surge through my body. He gently explored my lips with his tongue, and I opened my mouth in surprise. Haldur must've taken this as an invitation, as he slipped his tongue inside my mouth, filling it with warmth. I felt a familiar tingle in my pelvis and I moaned as he expertly caressed my tongue. His hands came up around my face, as he stroked my skin delicately. He broke off the kiss and watched me watch him sit back. I still felt tingly and had the strongest urge to kiss him again and see where it lead us, but instead I exhaled and leaned against the back of the couch.

"You like?" he asked, already knowing the answer.

"Yes. Thank you. That was very nice," I replied, feeling like I was in the throes of a sexual thrall.

Haldur smiled to himself and he put his hand on my thigh, "I do that again. You have soft skin."

I laughed at the remark, "Yes. Women have soft skin."

Haldur looked at me oddly, "Not women at home. They have rough skin, and dirty. You clean and soft. Like ellith. Not like women."

I knew that ellith meant female elves, as Haldur had explained a few terms that he had used with me during our dream conversations; but I wasn't sure what he meant by the women having rough skin.

"Women have rough skin? Like farmers or labourers?" I asked.

"They tend land, live hard life. You not work land; you have soft hair and skin. You more like ellith," he explained.

Ah, the women from his country were labourers. Must be a hard life. I thought about Haldur's sword and wondered how technologically advanced they were where he lived. Even Third World countries used guns and bombs to fight each other. Haldur had said he was in the middle of a battle when he disappeared from his country, but since that statement, he hadn't mentioned the battle again.

I started as Haldur leaned in again, "I like you. You very nice." He gently kissed my cheek and got up to go into the kitchen.

I sat on the couch absolutely dumbfounded. With one kiss, Haldur had irrevocably changed the status of our relationship, and I wasn't sure if I was ready for that quite yet.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter Six-Heart and Soul

June arrived on United around 11:30am on the 18th, and unfortunately took an hour to get through security. She had accidentally told one of the CBSA officers that she was here to visit a friend who worked for the Government. They got suspicious right away, and checked her luggage and purse, and asked her if she was bringing across any substantial amounts of money. I had to laugh when she finally trudged through the security doors with a tired look on her face. Once she told me the story, I asked her why she didn't just say that I worked for Indian Affairs. She said she couldn't remember the name of my department, and was so flustered by the brow-beating she forgot to mention I dealt with Indian claims. I patted her back and taking her luggage, walked with her out to the car. Haldur was sitting in my little sedan, and as soon as he spotted me, he got out.

June's jaw dropped and she grabbed my arm, "Who is that?" she gasped.

"Oh, okay. This is Haldur. He's a friend from Norway here to learn English," I explained, trotting out my well-used lie.

June poked me, "Are you going to introduce us?"

I laughed, "Sorry, I was just getting to that. Haldur, this is my friend June. June this is Haldur." I watched as June turned on her best smile.

"Hello Haldur. It is a pleasure to meet you," her voice dripped with Southern hospitality, "How are you doing this fine Vancouver day?"

Haldur looked at me, and getting the cue to answer, he took June's hand and shook it gently, "Hello June. I am fine. Susan tells me you are from Charlotte?"

I had coached Haldur on the proper response, and he had cleaned up his grammar enough to remember to speak in complete sentences. He still forgot things, but Alistair had taken time off of work to coach him while I was at the office, in preparation for June's visit.

"Yes I am," June beamed even more, "You are just the sweetest thing, aren't you? Susan, you have been keeping such wonderful secrets from me!"

Haldur took June's luggage from me, and I opened the trunk of the car. Once the luggage was squared away, and everyone had climbed in and buckled up, I started the car and drove out of the parkade. Haldur had stuffed himself in the back seat behind me, so I moved my seat as far forward as I could to accommodate his long legs without having my knees up around my chin. I may only be 5'8", but I had a 31 ½" inseam, and long legs get pretty uncomfortable being squished under a dashboard.

I drove June to her hotel. She was staying at the Sutton Place, which is quite popular with Hollywood. When folks come into town to film, if its budget was healthy, they'd park the stars in the Sutton. Five star service and accommodations, plus they were very discreet. The porters came out to help June with her mammoth suitcase, and I went with Haldur to park below the hotel. We had just entered the lobby when I saw that June had finished checking in, and was heading up to her room.

Taking Haldur by the hand, I followed her onto the elevator. Haldur had become more at ease in elevators, but he needed to touch me to reassure himself that nothing bad would happen. I likened it to regressive behaviour in the face of severe trauma. Haldur had been thrown into a radically different culture and was dealing with it the best way he knew how.

June looked at my hand entwined in Haldur's and pursed her lips. "So. How long had this been going on?" she gestured towards our hands.

I inwardly grimaced, "June, Haldur gets a little nervous in elevators."

"I do not like elevators. Too small," Haldur offered, holding my hand tighter.

June smiled, "Claustrophobia huh? That sucks," she turned to me, "I can't light up in the elevator can I?"

"No," I pointed to the no-smoking sign, "Remember, in your room or out on the street. WCB rules."

June frowned, "I know. I need to quit smoking."

"And you will when you immigrate here," I replied.

June laughed, "Yeah, when I get my shit together finally."

We arrived at June's room on the twelfth floor, and got her organized. June's room had a view of Robson Street and as soon as June had opened up the curtains, she flopped down on the edge of the bed and pulled out her smokes.

"Oh god, I needed this," she took a long drag, "That search with Customs was ridiculous. I cannot believe they thought I was buying my way into the country."

"Well, paranoia runs deep. What can I say?" I got up and moved to the door, "We're just going to go home and get changed. Then we'll come back around 3ish to take you out."

June waved through the cloud of smoke billowing around her, "Yeah, later."

Haldur and I drove home with the windows wide open and Haldur's hair whipped around inside the car. I had to laugh when he gleefully stuck his head out the window, like a dog, to feel the wind on his face. We were driving down Davie and even though we were only moving at maybe 35 to 40kms/hr, it was enough to invigorate Haldur. The first time I took him out in the car four weeks ago, he was completely freaked out. I had to pry him off the front seat; he was gripping the sides so hard. Now he enjoyed the rides. If I said I had to go somewhere, he'd immediately ask if I was going in my car. Living downtown meant I didn't have to drive many places, but with Haldur taking to car travel like a duck to water, I had to find excuses to take the car so he could have some fun.

When we arrived home, and got back into the apartment, Haldur turned to me.

"Thank you for the car ride," he said sincerely.

"You are most welcome," I replied, patting an anxious Roxy in greeting.

"I know you do not drive much. You drive for me," he said moving closer to me.

I could feel the heat from his body, and I shivered involuntarily. After our first kiss, I hadn't been in a position for potential contact like that. Haldur moved in close to my face, and I felt my heart rate race in anticipation.

My relationship with Haldur was hard to define. I wanted him like no other person before him, but I was still so hurt by Greg's betrayal, I couldn't let go of my heart.

His mouth was right next to mine, and I felt him move against my face. Lips caressed my skin softly. Once, twice, three times. Covering my cheeks and my forehead like the light beat of a butterfly's wings against silk. He stepped back and cupping my chin in his hand, he looked into my eyes.

"Thank you. For everything," he said softly.

My heart thumped loudly in my chest, "For what? I've just done what any good Canadian would do."

Haldur smiled, "No you have not. You have done more. You have a good and generous heart."

I was taken aback. Not just over the fact that Alistair and Haldur had obviously made great gains with his vocabulary, but that Haldur recognized I didn't have to do as much as I had. I was a little embarrassed at being caught in the act of altruism. Normally I do things on the DL. I don't like to be the centre of attention, but I enjoy helping people. I know I help people in my job, but I have such a kinship with humanity, a deep and abiding love, I have to help whenever I can. I just feel wrong if I don't.

Haldur smiled at me again, before he turned to get Roxy's leash, in order to take her out for a walk. I slipped on a pair of runners and walked out with them. The weather was still very hot, but instead of taking Roxy to the beach to play in the cool ocean water, he walked towards the park. We walked through the tall trees on a dirt path, not saying a word to each other. Roxy enthusiastically sniffed every shrub and branch on the path, and I watched Haldur relax under the green canopy. Years seemed to melt off his face the deeper we went into the woods.

My heart tugged inside my chest and I wondered if I was falling in love with him. I had been so damaged by Greg, but having Haldur in my home for the last seven weeks, with no expectations from him for anything romantic, I was beginning to feel safe again. I didn't know if Haldur had been told about Greg by Alistair, but I knew he could've tried to take advantage of the situation on many occasions. He never made a move, even after our first kiss, he remained a gentleman. I knew there was sexual attraction, but since I can never tell if I'm generating enough current for two people or not, I didn't know if he felt anything for me. I was scared and excited at the same time. The prospect of a relationship had me torn in different directions, and I wasn't sure what to do. My friends would all say go for it, as they believed there was nothing to lose. I felt a little differently. My heart could be lost, and I didn't know if I could go through that torment again. My emotions wanted to try again, but my intellect didn't want to risk a negative response.

When we got back to the apartment, I gave Roxy some fresh water before I got into the shower to get ready for the evening.

I had bought Haldur a few pairs of khakis and the softest pair of jeans I could find. He had tried on this pair of Seven jeans, and said the feel was fine, so I ponied up $200 for them, and told him to not wear them into the water. The khakis were much cheaper Gap khakis. I can afford to blow $40 on sale. I had also picked up this soft cotton sweater from Banana Republic, and I loved him in it. I had laid it out for him to change into after he had showered.

My shower was a quick cold one, as I needed to cool off after wandering out in the heat. I jumped out of tub and towelled myself off as quickly as I could, so Haldur could use the bathroom next. Haldur was waiting outside the door when I came out in my robe. I had left the water running and handed him a fresh towel as I walked past him. He had taken off his shirt and his shorts were hanging precariously from his hips as he brushed by me. I forced myself to not think about my body's treacherous reaction to his proximity. Instead I went into my bedroom to get into my new summer skirt. It was a light cotton knit, skimming my hips and flaring out around my knees. I liked the coolness of the fabric in the heat, and that was the main reason I bought it. I needed to be cool in this heatwave, or I'd tempt another migraine. I pulled on a turquoise beaded t-shirt and a pair of flat slingbacks. Spraying on some perfume, I clipped on a chunky bracelet and walked out of my bedroom to wait out in the living room.

Haldur was quick and he came out with his bath towel slung low over his hips. I felt a surge of desire flood my body, and got up to hang out in the kitchen while he dressed. Haldur just gave me a funny look as I walked away from him. Normally I'd just sit on the couch while he changed, looking at the TV or the ceiling. Going into the kitchen was a poorly disguised attempt to avoid him, and he didn't know why.

I looked in the fridge for something to drink, and I called out, "Do you want some water before we go, or do you want something else?"

"Water is fine Susan. Is that the only reason you went to the kitchen?" he asked.

"Yup," I came out and tossed him a cool bottle, before I took a long gulp of my own, "I'm a bit thirsty."

Haldur nodded slowly, not quite believing me. Pulling the sweater over his head he commented, "You look very nice."

"Thank you. So do you," I added.

I looked at Haldur, drinking in his image. His tall, strong frame was shown off in the body-fitting sweater and slim-hipped khakis. Eschewing socks, he wore the leather loafers I had gotten him with casual panache. His hair was still damp and he picked up the comb he had put on the coffee table. Holding it out to me, he moved towards me. I pulled out a chair at the dining room table, and motioned for him to sit down.

This was our après-shower ritual. I would spend twenty minutes combing out his hair and massaging his scalp, and he would practice his reading aloud. Alistair and Steve had been teaching Haldur how to read in order to strengthen his language skills. So far he was doing all right. He would read articles from the local free papers, like "The Georgia Straight", "24 Hours" or "Metro". The articles were fairly short and used an easy reading style, helpful to ESL readers. Haldur was reading an article from "24 Hours" about Olympic cost overruns. I half-listened, listening for any reading errors, as I carefully combed out his hair. He really enjoyed having me comb out his hair. It reminded me of when I would comb my sister's hair when we were teenagers. Liz always said having her hair combed out by another person was the most relaxing thing she could experience. I guess it was the same for Haldur. He'd always get this dreamy look on his face, and I'd have to poke him to get him back to reading.

At 2:30 we left Roxy with a bowl of water and a dish of food, making sure the air-conditioner was on low. Instead of driving, we took the Robson bus up to June's hotel. I had made reservations at 'West', to celebrate June's return to Vancouver. I wanted to take the bus over to South Granville, to wander around the cute stores and antique shops that lined Granville Street before we ate.

We met up with June and I explained the plan. She agreed, and we hopped a #98 B-Line to Broadway, in front of the hotel. The late afternoon sun beat down on us as we disembarked in front of the Chapters. Our reservation was for 6:30, so we had a few hours to kill, and we made the best of them. I led a mini-tour of the local shops and pointed out areas of interest. June had spotted a cute top in the 'tna' boutique, and had tried it on to see if it fit. Deciding she wanted it, she asked for it to be held until the store closed at 9pm, and she'd pick it up after dinner. We finally made it to 'West' just before 6:30, and were ushered into the intimate dining room. I was pleased that we had a table by the window, as I knew June loved to watch passers-by. Haldur sat beside me, so I could quietly explain the menu to him. June sat across from me, watching me interact with Haldur.

"So, how long have you been here Haldur?" June asked, leaning forward.

Haldur watched her carefully, "Seven weeks." His features were schooled into a calm mask.

"Well, I must say, you're English is very good. Is Susan the only teacher you have, or do you go to school here?" she continued.

I answered for Haldur, "He is tutored by an ESL teacher and my friend Alistair while I am at work. When I get home in the evenings, we go over the lessons with practical usage. I take him out to practice his new skills."

June nodded, "Uh-huh. So how long have you been seeing each other?" she bluntly asked.

I laughed, startling Haldur beside me, "We're not seeing each other, June. He's my friend and I'm helping him out."

June gave me a hard look, "But you want more."

Now I was getting uncomfortable. Haldur stepped in to defend me.

"Susan is my friend. We are happy as friends," his hand found mine under the table, and he squeezed it reassuringly.

June looked at Haldur, and deciding he would not help her cause, dropped the subject. "Sooo, what does everyone feel like having for dinner?" she casually remarked, picking up her menu.

Dinner relaxed considerably, once our meals came. I had the lamb, which was absolutely delicious; and Haldur had the truffle and ravioli. June went for some squab, and we finished with chocolate desserts. June had the chocolate tasting, gorging on three different chocolate creations. I shared the pot de crème with Haldur, who was amazed by the new taste of chocolate. I didn't know he had never had chocolate before, or I would've introduced him to the taste weeks ago. Needless to say, I only got a couple of bites, and Haldur consumed the rest in a fit of chocoholic haze. We waddled out of 'West' about 8:30, and wandered over to 'tna' to pick up June's top. She was tempted by a pair of casual pants as well, but decided she'd wait and see if anything else tempted her while she visited.

Our evening culminated in sitting outside on the patio at the Earl's on Robson, so June could smoke and drink. Haldur listened to us catch up, giggling like school girls as we discussed the frailties of men in general. We closed the place down, and Haldur and I escorted June back to her hotel, before we caught the N6 night bus on Granville to get back to Davie at Denman.

I got into the apartment, only to find Roxy dancing around like a whirling dervish. Picking up her leash, I wearily traded my slingbacks for a pair of suede slip-ons and clomped out the door with Haldur in close pursuit.

"I can take her if you are tired," he offered as we walked to the elevator.

"No, no. It's okay. I'll just take her around the block and then she'll be good for the night," I yawned.

He silently followed me onto the elevator, and took my hand. "Then we will walk together," he quietly said.

We walked out into the cool night air, and let Roxy have her head as we walked around the block. I cleaned up after she had done her business, and we started back to the apartment.

"What did June mean when she said you wanted more?" he asked, staring at the cement sidewalk.

I looked at him and then down at Roxy, who was investigating a shrub with great interest. "Uh, well…June seems to think that I am not happy just being your friend," I stammered.

Haldur looked over at me, taking my hand again, "Are you?"

"Am I what?" I evaded.

"Are you not happy just being my friend?" he answered calmly.

I didn't know what to say. I liked Haldur, and I was really attracted to him, but I didn't want to pressure him into anything he didn't want. My silence must've answered him, because he stopped me in my tracks and turned to face me.

"I like being your friend," he said looking into my eyes, "but I see what other people do, and I want to do that with you too."

I was slightly confused, "What do you mean? What do other people do?"

"They kiss. I want to kiss you too, but I feel like you are…not ready for me to do that," he carefully spoke.

I thought about what he said. If he was being honest, which I had no doubt of; he was saying he liked me more than as a friend. I hoped fervently I had assumed correctly.

"I don't want you to feel like you have to move things forward if you don't want to," I explained.

"Pardon me?" he in turn, looked confused.

"I would like you to kiss me too, but I don't want you to feel like you have to, or that you have to be more romantically involved with me if it's not what you want," I explained lamely.

He smiled and moved in closer, "It is what I want." He took my face in his large slender hands, and pulling me closer to him, he bent down and gently caressed my lips with his. I opened my mouth to suck on his lower lip and he slid his tongue in, sweeping my mouth and sending electric shocks throughout my body. I melted against him, and deepened the kiss, my body on fire from the contact. One of his hands slid off my face, and down my back, grasping my butt, pressing me even closer to him. I ran my fingers under his sweater, and felt the immense heat being generated. I shivered in desire, and felt myself grow more aroused by his body rubbing against mine. I could feel evidence of his arousal too, and just before our display became indecent, Haldur pulled away.

"We should get back," he panted.

"Yes," I agreed dizzily.

We walked back quickly, with Haldur holding my hand tightly to his chest. We entered my apartment in a flurry, quickly taking off Roxy's leash and locking up behind us. Haldur kicked off his shoes as I slid mine off, and then he pinned me to the wall. He trailed tiny butterfly kisses up my throat, before he devoured my mouth again. I lifted my leg up to wrap it around his waist. Haldur slid his arm under it, and lifted me up. He took my other leg, and slid his arm under my thigh, before he hoisted me into his arms. I wrapped my arms around his back to hold on as he moved across to the couch in the living room, and sat down. Kneeling on the couch, I grabbed the bottom of his sweater and pulled it off of him. He pulled my shirt off, and stared at my chest, letting his hands glide over my bra.

"Take this off," he whispered intensely.

I undid my bra and slid it off, and he sighed as he watched my breasts fall out of the silky cups of fabric. His hands cupped the fleshy globes, and his fingertips drew circles around the nipples, making me moan and writhe against his pelvis. He pulled my head down and began to kiss me again, as I pressed myself against his body, feeling the rippling musculature against my hot skin. I felt like I was melting into his body as time seemed to slow, and the only thing that existed was Haldur and me, locked in an intimate embrace. We became liquid, losing dimension and boundaries as we swam in each other's blood. I forgot myself, and let Haldur lift my skirt. He slid his fingers underneath my panties, grazing my nether lips, parting them to slide his fingers into my core. Mumbling something in his native tongue, he kissed me even deeper and I moaned in response. I felt the familiar surge build up in my pelvis as he worked his fingers in and out of me, sliding his thumb over my clit in time with his imbedded fingers. I broke off the kiss as I arched my back in ecstasy as the climax surged through my body. I jolted, all my muscles contracting in the force of the climax, and let out a tiny cry. I fell against Haldur's chest, panting from the exertion, as he stroked my back with the tips of his fingers. I felt a sensation of loss as he pulled his fingers out of me. I ground my pelvis against his erection, and I felt it jump inside his pants. Part of me wanted to take off his pants and make love to him on the couch, and part of me wasn't sure I was ready to make love again, even though my body cried out for the intimacy of penetration. Haldur, sensing my torn emotions, gently lifted me off of his lap, and put me down beside him.

"I can wait," he said simply.

"No you can't. I can do this," I replied.

"I can wait," he reiterated. Standing up, he picked me up off the couch and carried me to my bedroom. Gently he put me down on the bed, and walked over to the door, pausing before he left, "I can wait for you." He softly closed the door behind him as he went back into the living room for the night.

I stared at the dark ceiling, wondering why I couldn't just give myself to him like other women would gladly do. That night was spent tossing and turning as I fretted over my desire for Haldur and my reticence to fully give myself to him.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter Seven-The Private War Within

(Warning-Sexual situation.)

I was lying in a huge bed staring at the fresco of some Italian pastoral scene on the ceiling. Sweet cherubs laughed in perpetual joy and chivalrous gentlemen aided their lovely female companions, as they frolicked through verdant fields endlessly. A movement out of the corner of my eye caught my attention, and I turned my head to look. Haldur was standing in his full glory at the edge of the bed, looking down at me. Without saying a word, he got under the covers to join me. I noticed I was as naked as he was, but this seemed quite normal. He cuddled close to me and we began to kiss deeply, as though this was an ordinary act. The silk sheets slid around our bodies as we touched each other, and buried ourselves in each other's flesh. I felt his tongue work its way in and out of my core and then switch with his fingers, as he chose to suck on my tiny bundle of nerves. The climax approached like an impending electrical storm. All my senses strained under the pressure, before I fell over the edge into the abyss of pleasure. Haldur pulled himself up beside me, and spreading my legs open farther with his knees, he pressed his erection against my opening and then pushed his way in. I gasped at the intense pressure, wiggling to find a more comfortable position. He pushed in farther until he reached the end, and stopped for a moment to allow me to become accustomed to the new intrusion. I sighed and he began to move in and out of me slowly. The friction gave me a delicious sensation and I moaned for more. Haldur quickly complied, speeding up the thrusts, as I wrapped my legs around his back to deepen the penetration. He grunted with each onslaught and I felt another climax build. I raked my fingernails down his back as the pressure built to soaring heights. Haldur sped up, staring into my eyes with dark intensity, egging me on to completion. The orgasm hit me with the force of a Mack truck, and I cried out, arching my body against his as I shook with the force of the climax. Haldur followed me, giving one last thrust before he collapsed with a groan. He rolled off of me, and curled himself into my side, stroking my body with his fingers. I shivered at his touch.

He propped himself up on an elbow and looked into my eyes. "I love you," he said sincerely, caressing my face gently.

"I love you too," I kissed the tips of his fingers as they came within reach.

Just as I reached for his face to kiss him, I was jolted away into darkness.

I sat up suddenly in my bed with a cry. Haldur was sitting in his customary position at the foot of my bed. Seeing me awake with such a start, he leapt forward to grasp my arm, as I swayed in a fit of dizziness.

"What is the matter?" he asked in concern.

I looked around the room. The huge bed and Italian fresco had disappeared. I was in my pyjamas and Haldur was wearing the sweatpants I had bought him when he first arrived. Roxy had come into the room and jumped up on my bed, coming over to lick my face. I felt completely out of sorts, as I could've sworn Haldur and I had just had the most intense love making I had ever experienced. I felt sticky down below and knew my body had responded to my dream, but it all seemed so real.

"Uh, I was dreaming," I offered weakly. How could I tell Haldur I was dreaming of us having sex, when I had effectively denied him the previous evening?

"I heard. You talk in your sleep," he informed me.

I felt my face flush, as I wondered what I had said.

He looked at me with amusement on his face. "You looked like you were enjoying yourself, and then you mumbled something like, 'I love you'," he smiled at the consternation showing on my face, "But I could be wrong."

"Uh, yeah. Probably," I looked at Roxy, "Has she been out yet?"

"No, we were waiting for you," he explained.

I got out of bed, and wandered into the bathroom, regretting denying Haldur with every inch of my being. Admittedly, it was a dream and dream sex is usually mind-blowing, but still. Part of me felt it would be every bit as mind-blowing if I'd really done it with Haldur. I shut the bathroom door behind me, with Haldur waiting outside. I stripped and got into the shower to wash off the remains of my dream, as I thought of him listening at the door. I was half tempted to pull him in, but realized I couldn't. As much as I wanted him, which was totally and entirely, I also felt scared to let myself go again. I could hear Alistair talking in my ear, saying that I was a fool and I needed to trust somebody again. He was always talking about how I needed to let myself go and fall in love, because not everyone was a bad guy. I soaped up quickly, and washed myself thoroughly, wanting to wash away the whole situation. It was so much easier before, in the beginning when I wasn't attracted to him. But now I was attracted to him, and he seemingly to me. I couldn't keep him at bay forever, or I could lose him.

Once I had finished my morning ablution, I wrapped myself in my robe and wandered out into Haldur's arms. He caught me as I stumbled into him, and propped me up before I could hit the ground.

"Sorry," I mumbled.

"Susan, perhaps we should talk," Haldur offered, walking with me back to my room.

I turned to him, "Wait until I finish changing." I closed the door behind me and grabbed some shorts and a t-shirt out of my closet.

"Susan, I can tell you are not happy with the way things turned out last night," he called through the door.

Finishing dressing, I opened the door and stared at Haldur. "I have no one to blame but myself," I replied. I marched into the kitchen with Haldur trailing me. "Are you going to have a shower before we go?" I asked.

"I will, but first I want to say this," he stopped me and turned me to face him, "I want you, but I know you are not ready to be with me. I understand and I can wait. Do not feel that you must give yourself to me. I will not leave."

I looked down at his chest, "I want to be with you too. I can get through this, I just…"

He interrupted, "You are not ready. You fight within yourself. I am not leaving unless you want me to." He seemed a bit sad when he said that.

"No, no. You don't need to leave," I reached up to touch his face, "I'm just a bit confused, that's all."

Haldur led me to the table and had me sit down, "About what?"

I thought for a moment, "Did Alistair tell you about my ex?"

"Your ex?" Haldur looked a bit confused.

"My former boyfriend, Greg," I qualified.

"Oh," a look of understanding dawned over his face, "Greg. Yes. He was not kind to you," he said disdainfully.

"No, he was not," I agreed.

"He made love to another woman while he was living with you," he went on.

"Yes, I know the details," I said archly, "And you can figure out why I have trouble trusting men."

"But I am not a man," he offered.

I had forgotten that. Sure I saw the ears every day, and he had told me about his homeland, but I had gotten used to thinking about Haldur as just a guy. Albeit one of the sexiest guys I had ever laid eyes on, but still a guy.

"Yeah…and I want you to promise me one thing," I said straightening up.

"Of course," he leaned forward in his chair.

"Promise me that you will never betray me like that. That no matter what, you won't treat me like he did," I said fiercely.

Haldur reached across and touched my hands gently. "I will not betray you. I will not leave you. I will wait for you."

I felt a surge of relief at his sincere words, but knew I'd have a bit of work to do before I could comfortably give myself completely to him.

Haldur got up after making sure I was okay, and went to have his shower. Our morning rituals continued as normal, and we left the apartment to meet up with June at her hotel. I planned to drive her up to Whistler for the day, perhaps take the gondola up to the top to look around. Haldur was just happy to get out into the car. We left the windows down as we drove, to keep cool and avoid higher fuel consumption, as the price of gas was sitting at $0.98/litre. And that was with the $0.035 at the pump discount.

June met us out front, and we took Georgia Street to the Lions Gate Bridge, and over to West Van. I took the scenic route up to Whistler via Marine Drive in West Vancouver, and Haldur drank in the sights. June chattered gaily about what was going on in Charlotte, and I listened, speaking up when I needed clarification on some detail. I loved driving the winding road up to Whistler. It reminded me of driving the road to Hana on Maui. Except there weren't nearly as many hairpin turns, and the road was wide and well paved, while in Maui the road was a wee bit precarious in spots. Of course the weather was vastly different too. Here the cool sea air kept temperatures fairly moderate. There, the humid air and the jungle being very close to the road was almost oppressive the closer to Hana you got. While I loved Hawaii, I loved BC more, and I proudly showed off my Province to anyone who cared to come along.

Our day in Whistler was fun, as we tramped along hiking paths near the resort; and took the gondola to the top, with a surprise picnic lunch, which I had previously arranged, laid out for us. Haldur really enjoyed our walk in the forest and I mentioned how we would be going over to the Island the following week, to see Long Beach and Tofino, and how he'd really love the old growth there. June got excited about the prospect of a road trip, and seeing a part of BC she had not had the chance to visit. We had a lovely dinner at Earl's near the Village on Blackcomb Way. Leaving the restaurant around 8, I wanted to get us back into the city before it became too dark. I managed to get us back onto Marine Drive in West Van just as the sun was setting, and June oohed and ahhed in the appropriate places. I had to agree, as the colours were spectacular, and the sea was smooth as glass, reflecting the dying sunlight in its glorious form. We got back to June's hotel just after 10pm, and I dropped her off at the door, pleading exhaustion from all the driving I had done that day.

Haldur got into the front seat, and I drove us back home in silence. When we took Roxy out for her evening walk, and to make up for not taking her out earlier, it was in almost complete silence, except for the occasional command for Roxy and the odd question from Haldur. Once we got back into the apartment and had locked up for the night, Haldur turned to me with a peculiar look on his face.

"Susan?" he asked a bit awkwardly.

"Yeah?" I called over my shoulder as I went back to my bedroom.

"May I ask you a favour?" he continued.

"All right," I answered, pausing at my bedroom door.

He came up beside me, reminding me of how much I wanted him.

"May I sleep with you tonight?" he ventured.

My face registered a look of shock, and he must've realized how he sounded, because he quickly added, "Just to sleep. I just feel like I need to be close to you, and all I want to do is sleep. I promise."

I looked into his eyes and saw he was being sincere. I knew the temptation would be huge if he was in the same bed as me, but I also thought it would probably give me a good kick in the ass to move on with our relationship. I knew what Alistair would say if he was in my place, 'Hell yeah!', so I decided to take the chance.

"Uh, okay Haldur. You can sleep with me. I'm just going to get into my PJ's and get ready for bed," I explained awkwardly.

Why was I always an awkward teenager when it came to stuff like this? Okay, maybe not like this, but I was usually awkward when boyfriends asked for sex the first time. Sure, I'd like to have a mind reader so I didn't have to say anything, but you don't always get what you wish for.

Haldur let me get ready for bed without any hassles, and as soon as I crawled in under the covers, he came in wearing a pair of light pyjama bottoms I had gotten him a couple of weeks ago, and nothing else.

Noticing the look I gave him, he shrugged, "I get warm under blankets."

"I have the A/C on," I answered.

"Still, I like very little on, and you will not let me be nude," he replied.

I had no come back for that, as it was true. So he climbed under the covers with me, sliding up beside me. I turned off my bedside lamp, throwing the room into darkness.

"Are you sure you are all right with me being here?" he asked quietly, his voice reverberating in the silent, dark room.

"Yes, I am fine with it. Go to sleep," I ordered, turning over onto my side to get comfortable. I could feel Haldur's body heat, as he curled into my back; and I dearly wished I had the guts to turn over and make wild passionate love to him. My body wanted him badly, and I just had to convince my head that it would be all right. That he wasn't like other guys and I'd finally have the love I deserved.

I slept in the same position all night, my body warring with my head, wanting to do something I wasn't quite ready for.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter Eight-Looking Back, Moving Forward

I woke up with my head resting on Haldur's bare chest, and my legs curled between his. I used to wake up next to Greg that way. Remembering that, I uncurled from his side, and turned over to get up. An arm slid around my waist, and I half turned to look at Haldur.

"You slept restlessly. It is early yet, why do you not rest a little more? We do not have to meet June until later this afternoon," he reminded me.

"Not tired," I lied, even though I felt like a dog's breakfast, "I have to confirm our reservations with the Wickaninnish Inn. I have to make sure I have everything ready for the road trip, and make sure Alistair is still okay to take Roxy for the three days. Before we meet up with June, I want to take my car through the Jiffy Lube and get the oil changed and the tires checked. I have…"

Haldur held a finger up to my lips, "Must this all be done today?"

I looked at him, lying in my bed looking like the most delicious treat, tempting me. I knew these things could wait and the only important thing that needed immediate attention was confirming with the Inn. We were leaving on Tuesday. I could take my car for an oil change Monday after work and pack that evening. I knew I could make a reservation for the ferry to Departure Bay online in five minutes, so that was no big deal. What I didn't want was to be so close to Haldur, I could feel his heartbeat and hear the wind rushing through his lungs. Part of me wanted it too much, but my mind wasn't ready. Not when I reacted so negatively to memories of Greg. If he still affected me that much, I had to get him out of my system, so I could be whole and complete by myself. It was only then I felt I could be with Haldur without gypping him. He deserved to have someone without hang-ups about ex's. He needed someone who would give themselves completely, and not expect the worst of him. I wasn't sure I could be that person. Even though I really wanted to be.

Haldur watched me, lost in my thoughts, and pulling on my arm, he got me to topple over onto my side. "Stay," he said, "I want you to stay."

I shifted around so my head was on my pillow, and looked at him through my lashes. "Are you always this pushy?" I asked, keeping the grin off my face.

"In my land, I am listened to as a voice of authority. You are the first mortal not to fear me or my power," he said seriously.

I stuffed my head into my pillow. "Uh-huh," I choked out through laughter, "You are the voice of authority. Oh yeah. Tell me another one. You're the big bad! Fear my power!" I laughed helplessly, my body shaking with the effort.

"I am!" he rolled on top of me, poking me rudely.

"Hahahahaha! You're tickling me!" I gasped for air, "You're sooo bad!"

Haldur poked me and then changing tack, began to tickle me in earnest, "You cannot understand. I defend the realm!"

I snorted and laughed great belly laughs as his fingers sought out my most sensitive regions to plunder. "Uh-huh," I wheezed, "You're a regular Galahad!" I collapsed again as Haldur found a new spot to ravage under my ribcage.

"Who?" Haldur raised his head to look at my in question.

"Never," I caught my breath, "mind!"

He wrapped his legs around mine and continued to tickle me. "I do not understand why you affect me so," he said to himself.

I just laughed harder. Until he touched something that wasn't ticklish. I gasped in surprise as I felt his hand graze my breast accidentally. Haldur looked at me as he froze with my breath. Fire enveloped me, as I found desire surge forward from its hiding place. I held my breath, hoping he would continue with the caress. He gently stroked my breast with his fingers, and my nipple responded. I felt a shot of fire go down to my groin from my chest. His other hand came out from under my arm and he added it to the other breast. I found myself breathing harder as my arousal grew, and I let my legs fall apart to let him in closer. He knelt between my legs, as he leaned on his elbows, looking me directly in the eyes. I fought not to close them, so he wouldn't stop. I hadn't felt this good for a long time, and I wanted him touching me like that forever. Evidence of how Haldur felt soon became apparent as well, and when I sighed in pleasure, he pulled away.

His face flushed slightly, he said in a whisper, "Maybe we should get dressed."

I silently groaned. I didn't want him to pull away, but I understood he was trying to help me out by stopping before it became too hard for either of us.

"Okay," I replied, letting him get off me.

He left my room and shut the door behind him. I flopped back on the bed with an audible groan. I had to nip this issue in the bud or I was going to lose any sanity I had left. I knew just how to do that. Rolling over to the edge of the bed, I grabbed the phone. I dialled the number I remembered, and hoped it was the right one.

"Hello?" a light breathy voice answered a little groggily on the third ring.

"Is Greg there?" I asked, putting on my best Federal Government voice.

"Uh, yeah," I heard some rustling of cloth, then, "Greg, some woman is asking for you."

"God Kim, I'm sleeping. Can't you take a message?" I heard Greg groan.

"I don't have any paper or a pen," she whined.

The sound of fumbling and a couple of swear words happened before, "Yeah?"

"Greg?" I kept my voice neutral, "Glad to talk to you. Look, we need to talk."

Greg coughed in my ear, "Susan? What the fuck? Why are you calling me? And why are you calling on a Sunday at…Jesus, eight in the morning?"

I flinched at his words, and then remembering my purpose, I said, "We need to talk today. This can't wait. Will you meet me at the Blenz on Robson and Bute, say at noon?"

Greg groaned, "Susan, I don't know what you want to talk about, and I don't have anything to say to you, so no. Why can't you tell me over the phone?"

"Because this is best done in person, and if you don't meet me, I will be forced to report your under-the-table earnings with CRA," I coolly advised.

"Sue…aww fuck," he grunted, "Fine. Blenz on Robson and Bute at noon. You can be such a bitch."

"I'm not the one who felt the need to fuck around during the relationship, so perhaps your assessment needs refining," I coldly advised, "Noon, don't be late."

"Yeah, yeah. Whatever," he spat.

And before he could say another word, I hung up the phone. The first step to my emotional freedom had been completed. I got out of bed, and went to the washroom. Haldur was inside, taking a shower, but he'd left the door unlocked. I was tempted to get my toothbrush, but I was wary. My shower curtain was clear with some irises growing up from the bottom, only going to maybe mid-thigh. I knew I'd get an eyeful, so I decided to back into the bathroom, and grab my toothbrush. Then I could dash out the door, without seeing too much.

I knocked on the door. "Haldur, I'm just going to get my toothbrush," I called as I entered backwards.

"All right Susan, you don't have to hide," he called from under the shower water.

"I'm good thanks," I put some toothpaste on my brush, and caught a glimpse of him in the foggy mirror. "We're going to meet Greg at noon," I announced.

The water was turned off suddenly, "What? Why are we meeting him?" He had pulled back the curtain to speak to me.

I stared at the door concertedly, "I need to get some things off my chest regarding our split, and I'd like to do this as soon as possible."

"There is nothing on your chest that Eru has not put there," he commented.

"I meant I need to discuss some details and put them to rest," I explained.

Haldur grunted, "I will make sure he does not treat you poorly."

"No need. I can handle him. I just wanted to let you know," I grabbed the door knob and opened it.

"I am almost finished, would you like to wait?" he called.

"I'm fine. I'm just going to brush my teeth and then go online for a bit," I replied, hurrying out the door. I paused outside the door and listened to the water being turned back on, before I walked into the kitchen to brush my teeth.

I was surfing the net when Haldur came out with his comb in hand. I finished making our ferry reservations and turned to him.

"Ferry reservations for Horseshoe Bay are done," I announced.

"All right," he sat down at the kitchen table, and I moved to stand behind him and comb out his hair.

After I had finished, I gave him back the comb and walked to the bathroom with my toothbrush. "We can have breakfast, and then I wanna drive over to Arbutus to get the oil change. It should only take half an hour, and we'll be able to make it back for noon to meet Greg," I called from the hall.

I heard a grunt from the kitchen as I went into the bathroom to have my shower. After I had my shower, gotten dressed, and picked up my to-do list, I walked into the living room. Haldur was completely dressed and waiting for me with Roxy. He'd already clipped her leash on and looked at me expectantly.

"All right, let's go," I opened the front door and we walked out to the elevator.

After we took Roxy out for her walk, we dropped her back in the apartment, and then hopped in the car to get the oil changed. Haldur barely said a word to me, lost in his own thoughts. I had the car's oil changed and the tire pressure checked, and to be on the safe side, I got a fuel injection flush. It took just over forty-five minutes, and then we were on our way to meet up with Greg. I swung by Granville Island to pick up some fresh fruit and vegetables for snacking on the road trip. Haldur wanted to try some star fruit, so I picked one up for him. He seemed to relax a bit more as we wandered through the Market. It wasn't until we got to Blenz that his hackles went back up.

I saw Greg sitting in the corner by the washroom, so I bought Haldur and me a fruit drink, and then went over to the tiny table to sit down. Greg frowned at Haldur, who chose to stand behind me glowering at Greg.

"Who's the bodyguard?" he asked irritably.

"His name's Haldur. Now, I want to talk to you about why we broke up," I said coolly.

Greg choked back a laugh, "Why we broke up? What? You don't know?"

Haldur glared at Greg and moved towards him. Greg squished himself farther into the corner, trying to press even closer to the window.

"Call off your dog," he demanded.

"Haldur's simply reacting to your behaviour Greg. Relax. As long as you don't try and do something stupid, you'll be fine. Now, I wanted to talk to you about the way you fucked around on me, and why that still makes me angry," I said, leaning forward.

Greg chuffed and took a long sip from his iced latte. "So I slept with another woman. Big deal. I wouldn't have if you gave me what I needed," he said scornfully.

"You're here to listen, Greg. So shut your yap, and let me talk," I said, my anger rising, "You slept with more than one woman. You started screwing around on me within the first three months of our relationship. I found that out after I caught you screwing Kimmy. Lovely treat that," I paused remembering the betrayal, "I want you to know, you hurt me. You betrayed me in the worst way possible. I am positive I was not the first woman you have hurt this way, and I know I won't be the last." I played with my half-empty cup, "So, have you started screwing around on Kimmy yet? Oh, wait a minute, yeah you have been. You must be on what, your second or third affair? I would feel for Kimmy, but she knew what she was getting into when she bunked with you." I looked him in the eye, "I want you to know, I'm very angry at the behaviour you displayed during our relationship. I'm hurt at the way you deceived me, and how you played me for a fool. But I want you to realize, it was your actions that dissolved our relationship. No matter how you like to spin that I did something. I was the loving partner. I never betrayed you. You left me feeling like I had, but I've had a lot of time to think about what went wrong. I've come to a new understanding. You are the worthless git. I gave you everything, which considering how you treated me, was wrong of me. I should've left the moment I thought something was wrong." Greg scoffed at that, and I silenced him with a dirty look, "I am through blaming myself. I have people who truly love me, and I know I'm better off than you will ever be. You on the other hand, will probably never get over your misogyny. I suppose you'll be an old man, still trying to fuck with women's heads, sad and pathetic as that may be. I, however, will go on. Remembering the lessons given, but I will be whole. Not the scarred, frightened woman you left me as."

Greg laughed, "You called me here to proselytize? Oh my God, you're pathetic."

Haldur stepped up beside him, "You are an idiot. She called you, so she could leave you in the past. Where you belong." Haldur towered over Greg and sniffed disdainfully, "How you continue to have women trust you is beyond my knowledge. Any person could see what a fraud you are."

I looked up at Haldur, who smiled down at me. A surge of empowerment flooded my body, and I knew that I'd confronted the demon who'd been haunting me for months. I'd confronted it and come out the other side unscathed. Greg had other ideas.

"You bitch. You call me names and say you're over me. Yada yada, whatever! You're full of shit. I left you because you're worthless. I deserve more than your miserable crap. I left you, remember? I left you," he spat.

"You left me because I changed the locks on the door," I reminded him, "And I'm not worthless. But believe whatever you have to in order to get by. I can't blame you for being delusional. It's an illness. You can't help yourself." I stood up, getting ready to leave, "You may never see the truth Greg, but I didn't want to talk to you to help you see anything. I came to put the past back in the past and close the door on you forever." With that, Haldur took my arm and we walked out of the café without even a backwards glance.

Once we got back out on the sidewalk and were returning to my car, Haldur turned to me and smiled.

"So that is why you needed to speak to him? You needed to confront the past so you could let it go?" he asked, holding my hands in his.

"Yeah. He was holding me back. I felt such betrayal and I was using that to keep from being hurt again. But that was hurting me even more in the process. I needed to tell him good bye and good riddance so I could move into the future," I explained.

Haldur brought my hands to his lips and kissed them, "I am glad."

The rest of the afternoon was spent meeting up with June, and going out to a late lunch. I had to work early on Monday, so we left her just after dinner to get back home. Roxy was never so glad to see us when we walked through the door. Haldur and I rewarded her patience with an extra long walk through the Park. The entire time, it felt like bit of me were being stripped away and I felt lighter than I had before.

Haldur watched me as we walked. "You look different," he commented.

"Uh-huh," I replied, tugging the leash to get Roxy out of the low shrubs.

"You look free," he said.

"Because I feel free. Freer than I have since I began dating Greg," I explained.

"I like this on you," he squeezed my hand, "You are beautiful, free."

I grinned, and felt lighter even still.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter Nine-Good Things Come to Those Who Wait

Tuesday morning, at the crack of dawn or what I felt was the crack of dawn, I had Haldur load up the trunk of my car, while I discussed Roxy's walking and eating habits with Alistair. Alistair was grinning as I explained Roxy's walking schedule for the nth time.

"Susan, I already know this," he laughed, "I have taken care of Roxy before y'know. We're good buddies, aren't we Rox?" He bent down and ruffled her fur, as she licked his wrist.

"I know, I know. I just worry, that's all," I dragged my heel along the sidewalk.

"And you have every right to," Alistair patted my back soothingly, "She's your baby. I understand. Now, I have only one request of you."

"Uh-huh?" I patted Roxy as I looked at Alistair.

"Have a good time! For heaven's sake, you need the break, and consider this a primo opportunity to advance this thing you've got going on with Haldur," he scolded me.

I stood up. "We're going with June," I reminded him.

"You're not going to be with June all the time. You have two rooms booked. You've told me you're not a screamer, so I don't see what the problem is," he said seriously.

"I will do my best to live down to your basest desires," I retorted.

"That's all I ask," Alistair leaned in and hugged me hard, "Now go out there and make me proud."

I laughed and handed him the leash. Haldur had closed the trunk and was standing by the car, waiting for us to leave. The early morning sun shone through the tree branches, and the dappled light made Haldur's skin glow warmly.

I had bought him a MEC Monsoon jacket for the possible wet conditions. I didn't think we'd get rain, but I figured on surf. In some spots, the ocean comes up in huge waves, crashing against the rocks in a spectacular fashion. We had gone to the MEC store on Broadway, and he'd picked out the jacket himself. We had to get to get the tall size, as the regular just didn't have long enough arms. He loved the jacket so much, he stood by the car clutching it in his hands. The temperature was a warm 28C and he wouldn't need the jacket unless there was a sudden downpour, which, with no clouds in the sky, seemed like an impossibility.

Giving Roxy another goodbye pat, I turned and went to the car. Haldur got in, folding himself into the front seat, and I opened the driver's side door, pausing for a second.

"Take good care of Roxy, Alistair. She's my baby," I said before I got in as well.

Alistair grinned and walked away with Roxy, back to his place. I started the engine and off we went. Picked June up at her hotel and then headed off to Horseshoe Bay for the 8:30am sailing to Departure Bay. I went through the McDonald's Drive-thru, so we could have something that resembled food for breakfast. I come from a long line of ferry travellers, and there is one thing we can count on, and that's bad ferry food. Eggs like rubber, bacon that's still alive; with toast being pretty much the only safe thing. Plus, I haven't the foggiest idea how you screw up a hamburger, but believe me, they've done it. June and Haldur held the bags of steaming food, as I drove into the line-up to pay for the ferry. While we waited to board, we ate our breakfast and read the paper. Haldur went for a short walk through the line, and returned with little bits of paper in his hand.

"Some women gave these to me," he said, a little perplexed.

I looked closer and noted they were phone numbers. "Haldur, those women gave you their phone numbers. They seem to really like you," I commented.

"Are you going to call them?" June asked mischievously.

"No," he said decisively, "I am happy as I am."

I gave his hand a squeeze, and he smiled back at me. The ferry began to board, and we drove onto the Queen of Cowichan. Quickly we got out of the car, locked it up tight, and got upstairs to secure seats for the voyage. The Horseshoe Bay to Departure Bay route isn't that exciting as far as ferry rides go. I prefer Tsawwassen to Swartz Bay. It's interesting, routing the ships through Active Pass and the Gulf Islands. The Departure Bay route is mostly ocean, or rather Strait crossing. No interesting land masses to keep the eyes occupied. Although you can keep a lookout for the odd Orca pod swimming up the coastal waters to the North. Haldur enjoyed the voyage anyway. He had not been on a ship this size before, and from what I could glean from the distracted words he mumbled, had not been on an ocean going boat at all. June was an old pro, having been to Victoria with me back in 2004. She led him outside and they waved to me through the large windows. It was funny to watch him be so awestruck by the seagulls, which are filthy birds and general pests. Everytime there was a break in the surf, June would yell something unintelligible, I am assuming it was about whales, and Haldur would run to the rail to look. After the third time, I pounded on the glass and waved for them to come in. It's only funny twice. After that, it's tiresome.

We docked at Departure Bay, and drove off the ferry in a long line of vehicles. I drove down Hwy 1 to Brechin, and then followed that to Hwy 19A, and onto Hwy 19. Just outside of Qualicum Beach, I took the exit to get onto Hwy 4, and followed the narrow road through Port Alberni. I reached the turn to go through Pacific Rim National Park, and even though we had been going through heavily wooded areas, Haldur seemed to relax a bit more. Maybe it had to do with the age of the trees, I had no idea. June asked if we would get lunch soon, as she was starved. It was just past one o'clock when we drove down Osprey Lane to the Inn. I had booked two king rooms, but the Inn staff had advised me that they would not be beside each other. When we got to the front desk, the desk clerk told me that June would be two floors down. I asked why, and they said it was just the way the rooms worked out. Peak season and I only booked a week in advance; I suppose I was very lucky to get what I got. June just gave me a look, you know the kind, when I took the key cards and handed her one. Haldur picked up our bags and walked with us to the elevator. He still didn't like them, but he put up with their existence.

June got off on two and told us to meet her in the restaurant in fifteen minutes, as she was famished and was in the mood to eat seriously. I told her not to wait for us if she was that hungry and she laughed as she wandered down the hall to her room. Our room was lovely. The view was spectacular, with huge windows that went from the floor almost up to the ceiling. Haldur put the bags down by the bed, and surveyed the premises.

"This will do," he announced.

I laughed, "It will more than do. It's lovely."

"There is only one bed," he observed.

I cleared my throat, "Are you okay with that?"

He looked at me carefully, "I am if you are."

I bit back a grin. He was hedging his bets. Typical man. I nodded, "I'm fine." To prove my point I walked up to him, wrapped my arms around him, and leaned in for a kiss.

Haldur tipped his face, and cradling my head with his fingers, he bent down to brush my lips with his. I felt an electric surge, as his gentle brush became more intense. I sighed and he deepened the kiss more. Our tongues duelled gently with each other, and I let my hands run under his t-shirt, feeling his smooth skin. His free hand slid under my shirt and ran up to cup a breast gently, kneading it through the fabric of my bra. I shivered under his gentle ministrations, and had to force myself to pull away from his touch.

"We have to meet June," I reminded him a little breathlessly.

He touched his head to mine and sighed, "Yes, we must go."

June had managed to score a table by the windows, which boasted a fabulous view. It seemed this place was chock-a-block full of spectacular views. We sat down as June nursed a Diet Coke and pointed to the menus we had picked up.

"You took too long to get here. I've already ordered," she smirked.

"No big," I replied, "I told you not to wait."

June just gave me a superior look and took another sip of her drink. I would've told her that we didn't do anything, but I figured she wouldn't buy it, so I didn't bother to correct her assumptions. We ordered and while we waited, June and I discussed what we wanted to do for the couple of days we were here. I wanted to take Haldur for a hike through the coastal rainforest after lunch, but June begged off, saying she needed to kick back and relax from all the car travel. We decided to meet for dinner around 8, and leave the next day free, so we could go where the wind took us.

With lunch over, June left us to our own devices while she went to explore the Inn on her own and find something to amuse herself with. Haldur and I went up to the room to change for the hike. I went into the bathroom, so I could avoid the temptation that was naked by the bed. I consulted with the concierge as to what the best hiking trails were nearest the Inn before Haldur and I headed out into the forest. Not too far away from the front doors of the Inn lay the comfortable coolness of the woods. Haldur practically dragged me in after him; he was so excited by the trees.

As we entered the shade, Haldur relaxed and began his usual greeting of the trees. He would go to each tree and touch his hands and face to its bark, muttering quiet words in his native tongue. You could feel the shift in the energy of the woods as they greeted him back; not by doing anything, just the energy changed. It was subtle, and you'd miss it completely if you weren't looking for it. I remember him doing this in Stanley Park with a group of tourists standing not even twenty feet away from him, completely oblivious to what was occurring. We were alone in the forest now, and I felt a powerful sense of peace flow through me as he moved deeper into the old growth, greeting his old friends along the way. He led me off the marked path, holding my hand to his chest, as he walked with complete assurance even deeper into the darkening growth. We slowed to a stop about two klicks away from the Inn. Haldur leaned against the trunk of a very large tree and pulled me close to him.

"I feel like I am home here. The trees are quite old, not as ancient as the ones in my homeland, but old. It is like breathing fresh air again, to be amongst friends," he said softly.

"Do you miss home?" I asked carefully.

He looked down at me, "Yes. I miss my friends and my work. I miss the way the trees talk to me, but I also like being here with you."

I wrinkled my nose, "Are you just saying that?"

A rumble of laughter echoed through his chest, "No. I am very glad we met and I am happy to be with you. Do you not realize how much I care about you? I have made no effort to try and find my way home because I am happy here with you."

I snuggled closer, "Just as long as I'm not holding you back from something important."

He kissed the top of my head, "Speaking of important…"

Haldur leaned down and captured my lips in his. His tongue darted in and out of my mouth, as his fingers lifted my shirt, pulling it up over my breasts. I gasped as the cool damp air touched my warm skin. Haldur unclasped my bra and slid his hands under the loosened cups to knead the sensitive flesh. I knew I was ready, and I pulled his top off, breaking the kiss only to allow the passage of the shirt. Haldur finished pulling off my pale tee and bra, and dropped them onto the forest floor by our feet. I arched my back as he trailed kisses down my chest to my breasts, gently sucking on the hardened nipples, giving them equal soft attention. Fingers worked open my shorts and pulled them to the ground. I could feel my arousal build as I felt his fingers brush my nether lips as he peeled off my panties. First one finger, then a second entered me as he sucked on my tiny bud of pleasure. I grasped his hair, trying not to yank it, as waves of bliss built higher and higher. Lifting my leg onto his shoulder, I moaned softly, panting through the wonderful sensations. My legs began to shake as I felt closer to the crest, and with one swift movement, Haldur had me leaning against the rough bark of the tree. I didn't care that bark was biting into my skin, as the waves of pleasure had built up to an intense continuous crash of euphoria pounding through my body. I crashed over the edge, and cried out, stifling the noise with my fist. A few birds, high in the canopy, were startled by my cry and flew up into the sky with squawks of indignation.

Haldur pulled away from me, sat back on his haunches, and looked up with his intense blue-grey eyes. "You are ready for this now." It was a statement of fact, not a request for confirmation.

"Yes," I replied softly, stroking his cheek with my fingers.

He stood up, "I will be gentle."

Kissing me, he nudged my legs farther apart with his knees. I ran my hands over his body, relishing the feel of his skin under my fingertips. His skin was so smooth and soft. Like an infant's, except it reacted entirely differently under my delicate touch. Goosebumps formed under my fingertips, and as I placed tiny kisses on his chest, I felt little contractions of the muscles underneath the skin. It was as though I was exploring something so entirely new and different, no one else had ever encountered it before. I explored his body with my lips, learning every nook and cranny. I memorized his scent and taste. He smelled like the forest after a light rain, and tasted like the dew on the petals of a flower first thing in the morning. I nuzzled his silky hair, drinking in deeply the essence of his being.

I felt Haldur's erection push against me, and I tilted my pelvis to help him in. There was sudden pop and then a massive feeling of pressure as he slowly eased inside me. I gasped with the effort, and he stopped his intrusion to see if I was all right. I nodded, and he continued inwards. When he got in as far as he could go, he began to thrust slowly, and I shifted to accommodate him. I lifted my leg up, and he slid his arm under it, to help support me. He then began to pump in earnest, and I thrust back at him, meeting him hard every time. Sensations threatened to overwhelm me as they ran into each other, melting like warm chocolate on a summer's day. Haldur whispered things in his melodic language as we continued with our ancient dance.

It didn't take long before Haldur had sped up his thrusts, and I was in a delirium of sensation, fast approaching my apogee. He looked into my eyes, seeming to send me all his love with his gaze. I collapsed into my climax, biting Haldur's shoulder to keep from crying out. He continued to pump and whisper words before he came with a grunt, and fell against me. We clung to each other for a moment before he pulled himself off of me, and leaned against the tree, hugging my side.

"I love you Susan," he said softly, gently running his fingers through my hair.

I was a bit stunned as I looked into his eyes and saw the truth of his words.

"I love you too," I whispered. I reached for his hand.

"I will never leave you. I promise you, I am a part of you forever," he went on.

I gave him an odd look, as the meaning of his words sank in, "I know you mean something with that, but I want more of an answer from you."

Haldur pulled me away from the tree as he held my hands in his, looking deeply into my eyes. "I mean that I am a part of you. Even if I am not physically with you, I will still be with you. Just as you will always be with me. With our act of love, we have bonded absolutely," he explained.

I felt this odd sensation of being more than just myself, and I looked at Haldur, somehow understanding what he meant. I was no longer alone. A single entity, by myself in the universe. I was somehow joined inexorably with Haldur, and he with me. I felt a tear run down my cheek, as I let this new completeness wash over me.

"You are crying," he wiped the tear away with his thumb.

"Yeah. I'm happy," I replied, kissing his palm.

"I am happy too," he kissed me again, and then bent down to pick up our clothes.

We dressed quickly and making sure we had brushed off any debris from the forest floor, we started back towards the Inn. Just before we got out of the woods, we encountered a couple just walking into the shade of the woods. They eyed us and smiled.

"Good hike?" the woman called out.

"Yes, it's lovely in there," I answered truthfully, "Enjoy your walk."

"We will," the man replied, as he took his partner's hand and walked away from us.

Haldur made our way back into the Inn, and I stopped by the concierge to book a spa treatment for the two of us. I was able to book a Lomilomi for two first thing in the morning. I knew that Haldur had never been to a spa, and I thought it would be a memorable experience for us both. As we walked to the elevator to go up to our room to clean up, I spotted June chatting up some cute young guy outside on the deck. She looked like she was having a marvellous time, so I decided not to interrupt. We had a few hours to kill between now and dinner, and I knew just how I wanted to spend them.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter Ten-The Next Logical Step

Haldur and I entered our room, and the moment we heard the lock click behind us, he was on me, kissing me everywhere. Staggering over to the bed, we stripped off our clothing, dropping it as we moved. Haldur gently laid me on the bed, before he reached down to untie my boots and pull them off with my shorts and panties. I watched him as he pulled off his own runners and slid his shorts off as well. Crouching over me with a predatory glint in his eye, he began to kiss my naked skin again. Working his way down my body, he gently blew on the hot skin at the apex of my thighs and I arched with the sensation. I let myself revel in the feelings, as he slid his fingers inside me and worked his tongue and lips over all my good spots. Just before I crested, he pulled away, lining his body up with mine. Spreading my legs to accommodate him, he pushed inside of me.

I guess his people have good stamina, as when I was with Greg; we never did it more than once a week. He would complain if I asked for more, saying he was only one man and could do only so much. I was starting to think that perhaps Greg's philandering had started earlier than I had previously thought.

My attention was pulled back to our lovemaking, as Haldur began to thrust with increasing momentum. I gasped as my body responded with matched fervour. Feeling the familiar pressure build again, I moaned with pleasure. Haldur kissed my skin and whispered some more words in his native tongue, and I felt a shiver run through my body as the presence of power grew in the air around us.

Haldur whispered urgently, "Repeat my words Susan."

In my delirium I nodded, unable to construct a coherent thought.

"_Im anna anim na le_," he whispered.

"_Im anna anim na le_," I repeated, having no idea what I was saying.

I felt a burst, as though a bubble in the atmosphere had broken, and a flood of new sensations poured into my body. Everything was heightened; sound, light and smell became more vivid. The feeling of Haldur thrusting into me was amplified to the point that I fell into climax almost violently, and my body contracted around his for what seemed like eternity. I felt Haldur climax just after I started, and I heard him gasp and pant, still thrusting into me, as though his body was on auto-pilot. He said some more words I didn't understand, but I somehow felt I knew what he was saying. I had the distinct impression that he was talking about 'forever and always', but I had no idea how I deduced that from his whispers. Slowly Haldur came to a stop, and my body still pulsed with the aftershocks of the intense orgasm. He rolled off me and curled his body into mine, as we shivered from the sweat of our bodies drying in the air-conditioned room.

When I felt I could speak again, I whispered, "What just happened?"

"We made love," Haldur evaded, kissing my shoulder.

"Okay, yeah, but I felt this odd sensation of…I dunno. It felt like there was some kind of power in the air, and then we said those words, and all of a sudden everything was on overdrive," I mused.

Haldur propped himself up on one elbow. "We have bonded," he said simply.

"You said that in the forest," I replied, "But there's more to it, right?"

He looked into my eyes, "What I said in the forest is true. My people bond with only one mate during life. I chose you."

I felt a surge of understanding run through my body. "As in marriage? One marriage per life?"

He searched my eyes, "Are you all right with that?"

I paused. I knew without a shadow of doubt that I loved Haldur, but marriage? I had only known him for a short while and we had just recently become intimate. Was I ready for that step? I didn't know. I had figured that after Greg, I'd be alone forever. I wasn't counting on falling for Haldur.

Haldur nudged me, "It is not like Man's marriage. It is a promise to be with that person, even when apart. To be a part of that person in spirit. Yes, we have children and run a single household, but we also spend great amounts of time apart. Our lives have just been…" he searched for the right word, "enriched by our agreement to become a part of each other."

"So, it's not legal?" I asked.

"It is recognized as a legal bond by my people, but in accordance to your laws; no it is not legal here," he explained.

"Do I have to go to your home?" I asked, curious.

He paused and spoke carefully, "I do not believe you would be suited to life in my land. You enjoy the comforts of this society, and I think you would miss your technology too much."

I laughed softly, "I'd be lost without Chapters and A & B Sound."

Haldur nodded, "You also do not have any battle skills."

"There's a lot of war where you live?" I asked.

"Right now there is a great war which will determine the course of the future for my realm. We have also had many periods of peace, but war interrupts on a regular interval," he said softly.

I nodded, trying to figure out just where his lands were located. I didn't know of any Caucasian races currently embroiled in any military disputes, other than the Iraqi war.

"Just where is your country?" I asked eager to figure out this puzzle.

Haldur smiled softly at me, "I told you I was from Arda."

"But where on Earth is Arda? I've never heard of this country and I'm pretty good at Geography," I persisted.

"It is not on this world," he said enigmatically.

"Not helping," I retorted, "Just where is this place called Arda?"

"I told you," he calmly replied, "It is not on this world. Arda is a different world, someplace very far from Earth."

"And just how do you know this?" I demanded, poking his naked chest.

"I do not know where Arda is in relation to Earth. I am assuming it is far, as you have never heard of it. You have technology that reaches deep into space, so I must deduce that Arda is not within these technologies reach. I can only hope to see my homeland again, but I am happy to spend eternity with you here. I love you and would never leave you voluntarily," he replied.

I felt a pang of guilt as I realized Haldur really did miss his homeland. I was effectively keeping him from searching for a way back home by being his love, no matter how unintentionally it had happened. I vowed internally that should the opportunity arise, I would assist him in getting home. I had been alone before and I knew that as long as I had his love, even if he wasn't there, I could deal with the aloneness. I still didn't quite know what to make of his explanation as to where his home was, but I knew intrinsically that he was telling the truth, no matter how implausible. I kissed his arm that was wrapped around my neck, and smiled. My decision to help him was firmly entrenched and I would do everything I could to see to his happiness. Whether it was with me for the rest of our lives, or seeing him go home and back to the life he missed.

We slept for the rest of the afternoon, lying in each other's arms, and I dreamt of Haldur and his home. I couldn't know if I was accurate in my dream depiction of his homeland, but my mind inserted the old growth forests of British Columbia, and homes sitting high in the trees' canopies, fashioned out of white cloth and foliage. I dreamt of the tree homes lit up at night by soft candlelight, with suspended walkways joining the homes lighted by torches. A tall man and woman greeted us, and the woman seemed to know me and smiled. We had tea under the heavy leaves in the darkness, with the soft glow of lanterns giving us enough light to see our cups by. My mind made these people Haldur's parents, but I really had no idea why my mind inserted them into the dream. Haldur told them of our bonding, and the woman smiled and clasped my hands in welcome. I woke up still feeling the sense of peace that pervaded my dream, as I lay in Haldur's arms, staring at the ceiling. Haldur shifted and opened his eyes as I turned to look at him.

"We should get cleaned up for dinner," I whispered, my voice rough from sleep.

Haldur smiled wickedly at me, "Care to share a shower?"

I grinned and got up, "Last one in's a rotten egg!"

I started to run for the bathroom door, only to be swept up in Haldur's arms as he laughed and carried me into the bathroom.

We had a leisurely shower, exploring each other as we cleaned up. I was amazed that not only was I in love, but that he loved me back. I always feel lucky when someone decides to love me, but this was even more amazing. I was positive I was the luckiest person on the planet to have him in my life. I knew I was being a terrible sap, and if I was in my right mind, I'd be scolding me for my romanticism, but as I was in the throes of love, I didn't much care.

Around 7:45, we had finally finished dressing and decided to go down to the restaurant to wait for June. I remembered the cute guy she was chatting up when we came back from our hike, and decided to ask her how it went. We were only just being seated when June sidled up to our table and sat down.

She barely held back the shit-eating grin that was spread over her face like peanut butter on toast. "Sooo how was your day?" she asked pseudo-innocently.

"It was lovely. The forest was lovely and cool and our hike was invigorating," I kept a neutral look on my face, "Who were you chatting up this afternoon? He was cute."

June laughed, "His name is Michael. Isn't that ironic? However, he's not American, he's from Australia. I was with him all afternoon, talking and getting to know him better."

"How much better?" I asked archly.

"Apparently not as well as you got to know Haldur," she shot back.

I didn't have a leg to stand on and she knew it. I didn't know how, but she knew Haldur and I made home base. I waggled a finger at her.

"Hey, we're talking about your afternoon, not mine," I reminded her.

"Yeah, well maybe if you two didn't look like you'd gotten well and laid, I wouldn't be talking about your afternoon," she retorted before she burst out laughing, "I was wondering when you'd finally break down and do it. Jesus, you're slow!"

"Oh shut up," I snipped, trying hard not to grin. June so had my number.

We ordered and spent the rest of the evening talking about the resort, the next day's plans and things we wanted to do before we went back to Vancouver. June managed to flag down her Aussie hunk, and making weak excuses, left Haldur and I alone to enjoy the rest of our night, as she went off to wreak havoc with her prey.

We flopped into bed just before midnight, and I fell asleep almost as soon as my head hit the pillow. My dreams were filled with Haldur and our new life together, as I slept deeply in his arms.

_Im anna anim na le _- I give myself to you


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter Eleven-Guess Who's Coming to Dinner?

The visit to the spa for our luxury treatments the next day was just what the doctor ordered. Haldur really enjoyed the Lomilomi treatment, and I was so relaxed by the end, I could barely get off the bed. Haldur had to help me get back to the dressing room. We went up to our room and showered there, as they wouldn't let Haldur shower with me. I didn't understand the problem, as I really was way to jelloey to stand alone in the shower. Once we were clean and dry, I finally felt clear again. Now focused and alert, we made our way down to the dining room to have lunch. June had made other plans, so we were alone until dinner. Eating quickly, we talked about plans for the afternoon, and decided to go for a walk along Chesterman Beach. The weather was wonderfully warm and I wanted to stroll down the sandy beach and explore the rock formations at the far end.

Our walk was quiet, filled with the sound of the waves rolling in, the gulls crying above us, and the wind blowing through the trees that lined the beach. Haldur held my hand casually, and watched the water as I watched his face. He seemed to be in a different place, remembering something that he wasn't telling me about. I said nothing, understanding he was very far from home. He had come to a different world, learned a new language, gotten used to a culture very disparate to his own, and then to top it all off, bonded with me. I was going to give him as much slack as he needed. I was sure he was probably a bit overwhelmed at everything, but then I only knew how I'd react. I had no idea what he was really feeling unless he told me. I had a strong impression he was happy, but also missing his home. That was only an impression though. I could've been quite wrong.

When we got to the rocks at the far end, Haldur helped me climb up to watch the waves crash against their tip, spraying us with salt water. I laughed as I got doused by a large wave slamming against the rocks really hard. Haldur smiled at my newly bedraggled look, and taking my hand, led me off the rocks and back onto the beach.

"We need to get you into dry clothes before you become ill," he told me as he led me back towards the Inn.

"It's warm out. I'm sure I'll dry off before we even get back to our room," I replied, smiling up at him.

"Ahhh, but then we will be safely ensconced in our room, and you will be undressed," he casually remarked, "While I draw you a bath for two."

Catching his drift, I grinned, "Whatever you say mon capitan."

We spent the rest of our afternoon, soaking in a hot bath and making love on our bed, with the sun streaming in through the windows. Haldur never said what had him lost in thought during our walk, but I found I didn't mind so much. Not when he spent so much time showing me how much he loved me with his touch.

Around eightish, we made our way back to the dining room for dinner with June. Mellow with the afterglow of our lovemaking, we wandered in and looked for our table and June.

Upon arriving I saw June was not alone. Her male friend from yesterday was sitting beside her, and they were having an amiable chat. June seemed very happy and did not notice our arrival. Sitting down opposite the happy couple, Haldur and I exchanged looks. Apparently June took our lead and got to know Michael very well over the course of the day and the previous evening as well.

As a waiter approached our table, I cheerily asked what everyone was going to order. June looked up in surprise at me.

"Oh, you're here," she said, looking for all the world like the kid with their hand in the cookie jar.

"Yes," I replied drolly, "And you have been busy, I see."

June blushed and scanned her menu hurriedly, "Uh, Michael and I have been getting to know each other, and I guess I lost track of time."

"No big," I announced, "Well I am going to have the venison. I've never had venison before."

Haldur looked at me, "You have not? You live so close to the wilds, it seems you would have by now."

"Nope, I've had bison, beef, turkey, chicken, lamb, and a lot of vegetables, but no venison," I said chirpily, trying to not laugh at June's distracted manner.

"Well then, I am sure you will enjoy it," Haldur announced, returning his gaze to the menu.

June looked up from her menu and grinned, "I just may have the oysters," she announced, throwing Michael a lascivious look, "It's either that or the seafood potlatch."

Michael poked her arm, "Oysters. Get the oysters." A sly smile was pasted on his face, and I couldn't help but grin at the implication.

June blushed and giggled behind her menu, and Haldur had the decency to look disgusted. I was beginning to think he wasn't a romantic at heart. Which suited me just fine. I liked a practical streak. Nothing made me laugh harder than some guy reciting poetry or singing to me. I preferred a guy who'd give me a Kitchen-Aid mixer for my birthday. You can use that stuff. Poetry and song doesn't pay the bills, but a Kitchen-Aid mixer made lovely eats for supper.

Dinner was good and soon after June and Michael beat a hasty retreat. I was surprised they lasted as long as they had. I was sure June was going to leave way before they served the chocolate symphony. The two of them pretty much ignored Haldur and I, as they fed each other from their plates, and basically cooed to each other ad nauseam. I really hoped I didn't act like that around Haldur, although I had the ugly sneaking suspicion I did.

Haldur and I ended up walking on the beach in front of the Inn, and sat down on a log beyond the warm light shining from the windows. Cuddling, we watched the stars pop into the darkening sky. When it was fully dark, I pointed out some of the constellations I remembered from the Astronomy I had learned back in high school. Haldur told me about what the stars looked like in his home's night sky, and then we sat and just enjoyed being together in silence.

The evening turned cool, and as I began to fight a shiver, Haldur pulled me into a warm embrace and whispered that we should go in and get to bed. I let him lead me back into the warmth of the Inn and up to our room. After we got into our cozy bed, I curled up next to him, and let his heat warm me up. Sleep came quickly. My dreams were a repeat of the previous evening, and I slept deeply.

The last day in Tofino was quick as we had to check out by noon to get back in time for our ferry. Michael was apparently quite entranced by June and they exchanged numbers, email, and he promised to come to Vancouver before the end of the week, so they would have some more time together. June was practically floating on air as we got into the car, after we squeezed our luggage into the trunk. As we drove off, she was waving wildly out the back window to Michael, who was waving back from the front door of the Inn. When we turned down the bend in the road, June turned back and buckled up her seatbelt. I watched her face in the rear view mirror, and saw a little tear form in the corner of her eye. I kept quiet, but knew I'd have to do something to keep her mind off of how much she missed Michael.

Once we got back into downtown Vancouver, I dropped June off at her hotel so she could get cleaned up and we could get our own stuff back into our apartment. I offered to get some of her laundry done before we met for dinner at eight. Then we picked up Roxy from Alistair's place, and she gave both Haldur and I wet tongue baths. She was so excited to see us; I asked Alistair if he treated her okay when we were gone. He laughed and told me Roxy didn't miss me a bit, and was just putting on a show. I was relieved once I got back into my little apartment again. While I liked to travel, I loved to come back to my own little bed and my books. I turned up the A/C and got to work sorting laundry. Haldur took Roxy out for a walk and picked up some fresh vegetables and fruit to hold us over until we could get to Granville Island. By eight that evening, we were clean, had clean clothes, and felt more rested. I gave June her clean clothes and we wandered over to the Earl's on Hornby for a quiet dinner.

June was obviously missing Michael, so we took her to the movies at the Paramount theatre next door. We saw "Superman Returns", even though June had already seen it twice. She was a total Superman freak and we acquiesced to her fanaticism. After we got out, and June was on a new high from seeing her favourite fandom on the big screen, we wandered down Robson and got some gelato to eat while we window shopped. By midnight, June was yawning, and I was beat, so we walked her back to her room. Bidding her goodnight, Haldur and I decided to walk back to the apartment and have a good night's sleep.

I had taken off Friday as well, but I knew that Michael would be coming into town around oneish, so we had arranged that he would meet up with us to surprise her at lunch. We'd then make ourselves scarce so they could spend the rest of the day together. June had no idea about our plans, as I had managed to get Michael alone before we left and we firmed up our surprise for her.

The next day we met June just before noon and we walked down to Cardero's for lunch. Michael was supposed to make his grand entrance just before we got our food. I had arranged that morning for Michael to have his order placed at his seat just as he walked up. It was a matter of timing, and the restaurant staff were all brought in on the surprise. June didn't think twice about being seated at a table for four by the window. The waiter didn't remove the extra place setting, but she didn't notice. She was busy watching the boats coming and going from the nearby marina. I hoped she'd remain distracted enough to not notice Michael before it was time. Just as I saw him enter the dining room, our waiter placed our meals before us. June had ordered the salmon, and was a bit perplexed that another salmon dish was placed at the setting beside her.

"I just ordered one entrée, why is there another one here?" she asked, clearly confused.

"That's because I ordered it," Michael's Aussie accent cut through the background din and June looked up in surprise.

"You're here!" she jumped up out of her seat.

"I am indeed," Michael threw his arms around her, and they embraced tightly before June placed a light kiss on his lips.

Looking down at me, June shook her head, and I grinned as I poked my lamb shank with my fork. "You planned this didn't you?" she accused.

"I haven't the foggiest notion of what you could be getting at," I retorted good naturedly.

June snorted as the two sat down, still clutching each other's hands. Haldur and I just shared a look before we returned to our meals. After we ate, I made our excuses, not that June was really paying attention; and Haldur and I left June and her new beau to their own devices. Last I saw was June and Michael kissing and sharing their dessert in a very public display of affection. I had to stifle a laugh as we walked out into the warm August sunshine.

Haldur and I spent our afternoon getting Roxy out for a long walk around the Stanley Park seawall and exploring the small shops along Denman. We were letting June have the weekend with Michael, and promised we'd meet up with her on Monday for lunch. She left early Tuesday morning, so we were making it an early day. I was taking an extra hour for lunch from work and would make up the time on Tuesday after her flight had left.

I enjoyed my quiet weekend alone with Haldur. We spent a good amount of time in bed, sleeping, reading and making love. Roxy managed to drag us out for three walks a day, and we all went splashing about in the cold ocean water on a couple of occasions.

It felt like we'd settled into a nice routine of coupledom. Haldur was a pretty good cook, once he got the hang of the stove. I had been the primary cook in the household, but Haldur was feeling a bit off, not having enough to do. So we decided since he cooked at home, we'd get him involved on the domestic side here. I got to eat a lot of his home-style meals and learned quite a bit about his culture in the process.

After June went home, about a week later, I had left Haldur a note about picking up some groceries from the Market and I was informed when I got back from work that I had been spelling his name incorrectly. Since I never usually wrote out his full name, I only wrote 'H' and signed myself as 'S', I didn't realize his name was spelled with an 'i' and not a 'u'. He corrected my error, and I now wrote his name as Haldir. He told me it was a logical mistake, as he rolled his 'r' and it made the 'i' sound like a 'u'.

My parents finally met Haldir, and they made their approval clearly known; with my Dad asking him to lunch and my Mom asking when his birthday was, so she could add him to the list. Alistair began buying bridal magazines. When I told him we hadn't even discussed a wedding yet; he told me in no uncertain terms that he was going to be the most fabulous bridesmaid ever, and I shouldn't go raining on his parade.

August turned into September and soon October, and then we had finished November and were rapidly careening towards Christmas with my family. Alistair always came to our celebrations, as his family was all back East, and he hadn't spoken to most of them for well over a decade. My Dad thought he was funny, and my Mom felt like he needed a mother, so she filled that role herself. My brother just put up with him, so all-in-all it was a pretty normal family dynamic. My brother was ecstatic to have a 'manly man' to hang out with, and was looking forward to seeing Haldir at Christmas. I was nervous because no one but Alistair and I new Haldir was an elf, and I hoped that no one would figure out exactly how different he was. I was really unsure of how they would take the news. So Christmastime hurtled closer and closer and I kept myself busy with getting ready for the festivities and introducing Haldir to our long held traditions. Haldir seemed to take everything in stride, and even submitted to a haircut, so his hair wouldn't have to be tied back, thus blowing the little secret about his ears. I told him hair always grows back and he shouldn't panic, as the new length, just below the shoulders, was very becoming.

Christmas had finally arrived and the family all gathered at my brother's house out in Tsawwassen. Mom and Dad had moved to a condo in New Westminster when Dad retired a decade earlier, so they didn't have enough room for our clan gatherings. David, my brother, had lived in Tsawwassen since he had gotten married, and now owned a lovely little home near English Bluff with a good sized yard and the obligatory dog and two kids. My nephew and niece were dolls, and excitedly greeted Haldir as we entered the foyer of the house. Their Saint Bernard Sadie, say that three times fast, was all over us, and barked happily as she spotted Roxy hiding out in a corner, avoiding the herd of feet. David took the dogs out to the backyard so they could prance about and not knock over any furniture.

Haldir was introduced to my sister-in-law Patricia, who gave him the fifty-cent tour of the house and got him a drink to get comfortable with. Dad had cooked the turkey again, and Pat was just getting a few of the vegetables ready for the table, so I lent a hand. Alistair wandered between the living room and the kitchen, tossing off bon mots as he refilled his drink and observed the conversations in either room. Dad laughed heartily and David just looked annoyed. David never had much of a sense of humour, but luckily Patricia made up for his lack of a funny bone.

Dinner was fabulous, with a huge turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, green beans, corn, cranberry sauce, sweet potato casserole, and plum pudding to top off the fattening feast. We waddled to the living room to open presents, and Haldir was pleased that no one forgot him. Everyone in the family had bought him presents, including my brother, undoubtedly due to Patricia's diligence as David was not a memory oriented kind of guy. Haldir had kindly made me a leather wallet, and I gladly switched out my old wallet, much to his pleasure. Alistair kept hinting about a small box, but I ignored his jibes, as the evening wore on. Finally, after the last present was opened, and we all sat around the fireplace talking, Haldir asked to have everyone's attention.

I was a bit surprised as Haldir hadn't said before that he was going to speak, but I held my tongue. He turned to me and began to speak softly, so that everyone stopped talking and leaned in to listen to him.

"Susan, I have known you for six months, and during that time I have come to love you and respect you a great deal," he said looking into my eyes.

Alistair squealed and grabbed my wrist as he leaned in to watch Haldir.

"I know it has been a short time, but I feel like we have known each other for lifetimes," Haldir took a breath and Alistair squeezed my hand harder, cutting off blood flow, "I know I want to be with you for the rest of my life, and I hope you feel the same way. So I am asking you, in front of your entire family, if you would consent to be my wife. Will you marry me?"

The room erupted as Haldir pulled out a ring from his pocket and slid it on my finger.

I blinked through the tears and as Alistair began shaking me wildly, I squeezed out a quiet, "Yes. I will marry you."

Haldir announced, "She said yes." And the room went crazy. My parents hugged each other and then the rest of the family, my brother patted my shoulder as Patricia gave me a kiss on the cheek, and Alistair triumphantly announced he had known this was going to happen, and wasn't it great that he had gotten a head start on the wedding planning?

I just hugged Haldir as the room became a chaotic mass around us, with Patricia telling everyone she'd break out the Dom and Dad telling me how much he had been waiting for this to happen. My Mom just degenerated into happy tears, kissing everyone in range and blowing her nose into a tissue.

It was a Christmas to remember, and I most certainly wouldn't be forgetting it any time soon.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter Twelve-Wedding Mania

Christmas had been a welcome respite, but the months afterwards were filled with busy wedding work. My parents were so relieved that I was getting married; they were pulling out all the stops. We actually had a wedding planner, which I felt was overkill, but my mother insisted. We managed to get the Westin Bayshore for both the ceremony and the reception. I didn't want a church ceremony, and I insisted on having it outdoors, otherwise my mother would've had me all dolled up in St. Andrews United up the road. Haldir and I had surreptitiously managed to obtain some false documents for use with getting the marriage certificate. I couldn't get Haldir a Social Insurance Number, but we managed with a fake birth certificate and a forged passport, which I was assured would pass muster with US Customs since they were the most paranoid.

Haldir was dragged out by my Dad to get fitted for his suit. Since we had opted for a small ceremony of less than sixty guests, I had decided that Haldir should wear a suit and not have a tux. I wasn't wearing the big ballroom dress either. I had found a simple tea-length golden cream dress with a simple bodice, beaded around the décolletage, wrists and hemline. Alistair was not going to pull bridesmaid duty, much to his chagrin. As he was Haldir's only friend here, he was standing up as his best man. June was acting as my maid of honour, and we had a friend of my Dad's who was a Supreme Court Justice acting as our JP or marriage commissioner. My mother insisted on loads of flowers and I had to draw the line at table arrangements that were taller than I was.

Finally the beginning of July rolled around and our wedding day approached. Haldur woke me up the day before the ceremony, kissing me gently while he stroked my stomach.

"Nrgh," I mumbled as I tried to turn over onto my side.

"Good morning to you too," his rich timbered voice brought me back into awareness.

"Yeah," I stretched and curled myself into his prone form.

"Do you remember?"

"'Member what?" I said groggily.

"It has been exactly one year since you came into my life," he whispered into my ear.

I opened my eyes, "It has?"

"Yes. Do you not remember?"

It came flooding back, the day, the circumstances, everything. "Why did you go with me that day?" I asked, still unsure about how everything had fallen together.

"I just knew you," he said simply.

"Whaddya mean?"

"It was like," he propped himself up on an elbow, "I knew you from before. Like we'd met in a dream somehow. I just knew you and knew I'd be all right with you."

He had mentioned that when I first met him, but I still couldn't believe it. Not that I was unhappy with how things had turned out. Haldir had proven to be my soul mate. We hardly ever argued, and when we did it lasted for such a short time, we'd forgive each other before we even left the room. We had the same tastes in music and movies, and Haldir had learned enough so that he could read my books and found he was quite fond of my collection of Buddhist literature. He enjoyed cooking and usually had a meal on the table by the time I got home from work. It was a nice domestic relationship. Until you got to the sex. That was mind-blowing. With one look, he'd have me so hot and bothered I would be making a bee-line for the couch or bed. Once, he called me at work to tell me what he was making for dinner, and he was so sensual in describing the meal, I was soaking wet by the end of the call and had to go clean up in the bathroom. I had never experienced anything like that before. I knew without Haldir, I would never experience anything like it again.

"I'm glad," I said finally, "I'm all right with you too."

Haldir's fingers slid underneath my PJ bottoms and I felt him stroke my mons. As I sucked in some air, I spread my legs to let him have freer access. He kissed me deeply and rubbed me into a sexual heat. I wanted him inside me, so pulling down my pants, I rolled on top of him and pulled his erect member out. His eyes glazed as I stroked him a few times before I guided him inside me. Pulling myself up and down on his hardness, I felt the familiar sensation of fullness and the beginnings of the wonderful tingle of orgasm. He thrust up as I came down, forcing himself deeper inside me, and we melded into a rhythm that brought us teetering close to the edge. I knew we'd be interrupted soon, as we had the rehearsal and the last minute preparations. Haldir reached down and began to rub the tiny bundle of nerves, grasping it between his fingers and stroking it like a small erection. That was enough for me. I fell into the abyss of my climax and Haldir soon came after. We lay shaking slightly in each others arms, a sheen of sweat coating our bodies, when the phone rang.

Groaning, I reached across Haldir's chest for the phone on the nightstand. "Hello?" I croaked.

"Oh Susan! You're not coming down with something now are you? The wedding is tomorrow!" It was my mother, calling to snap me out of my reverie induced by great sex.

"No Mom. I was asleep until recently. It's early remember?" I said archly, reminding her I had a life outside the wedding.

"Yes, I remember. Now, get yourself out of bed, lazy bones. We've got things to do!" she cheerily chirped.

I sighed into the phone, "I'll meet you at the planner's in an hour and a half."

"An hour," my mother countered.

"I have to shower Mom, or do you want me to smell like spunk?"

A pause on the other end, "Uh, no. An hour and a half." The line went dead.

Haldir took the phone from my hand and put it back in the cradle. "So, no leisurely day spent in bed?" he asked teasing me.

"No. But don't think you're getting out of it that easily. Alistair has a day planned for you too," I retorted.

Haldir's forehead wrinkled as he frowned, "We had that tradition you called a bachelor's party. What else could he want from me?"

"Ahhh grasshopper, do not ask such questions. All will be answered in time," I rolled out of bed and tapped his foot, "C'mon. We need a shower."

"Shower?" Haldir eyed me hopefully as he chased me into the bathroom.

An hour and a half later I was with my Mom and June, going over final plans for the rehearsal dinner and wedding reception. Haldir, I hoped was having a good time with Alistair. I knew Alistair had planned a whole day hiking out on the North Shore, and had hired a guide to show them some new trails. It was his way of acknowledging Haldir's affinity with the forests. He promised they'd be back by five, so that they could get ready for the rehearsal and the dinner. We'd arranged for a light supper to be served next door at Cardero's, as it was such a small party consisting of my parents, my brother's family, June, Alistair, Steve, Haldir and I. My Dad's friend had to leave shortly after the rehearsal, as he was expected at a dinner party with his wife.

By lunch, I was exhausted, and June and the planner had effectively shut my mother down from trying to push me into an early grave by having me work through lunch. You can only confirm things so many times before you lose your sanity.

Mom went home to get ready for the rehearsal at seven, and June and I spent lunch at the Stanley Park Teahouse in tranquillity. I was so glad June had flown in for the wedding. I missed her when she was home in North Carolina. We gabbed about her burgeoning relationship with Michael, the Australian. Michael had planned to come back to Canada to work for a year and see about immigrating via the Skilled Worker entrance, so June was looking into a similar situation so she could be closer to him. It seemed as though this was serious enough that I could be seeing her wedding in the next year or so. She hoped so and said as much.

After lunch we walked around the West End and relaxed. The rehearsal was informal, so I didn't worry about getting all dolled up. I just needed a shower from the sweat accumulated from the early heat of summer. June was going to wear a sundress, so I decided to follow suit. We went back to the apartment to pick out my dress. It felt so quiet with Haldir out and Roxy with him. Haldir had decided when Alistair showed up to tell him of his plans that Roxy needed more exercise, and took her with them. Roxy was so excited about a car ride, that I wondered if she thought she'd died and gone to doggie heaven after her day of tromping around the woods of the North Shore.

June and I plugged in a movie to kill time before the guys got back, and I was glad I'd taken off the day before my wedding. I don't think I'd be sane enough to work, and I really needed the break from the office. Meg was all in a snit about not being in the wedding party, even though she was invited. I told her we would only have two people standing up for us, and June was flying in especially for the event. Meg's a bit of a sore loser when it comes to things she wants. I stood firm with her, and as such was treated to the cold shoulder for the entire month before the wedding. Which was sort of a relief. Not having her interrupt my work seven times a day was a nice break.

As the credits rolled on our movie, the door opened and Roxy bounded in, followed by Haldir and a very tired looking Alistair. I hugged Alistair and thanked him for showing my family such a good time. He smiled weakly, and grabbed June, saying she simply had to help him convince Steve that velvet wasn't a good choice for a rehearsal dinner. Once the door was locked behind them, Haldir fell into my arms.

"I missed you," he said softly.

"Missed you too."

"I'm glad you don't have to spend the night away from me. I do not think I could deal without you in my bed," he said, holding me tighter.

"Well, so m'I. I don't like that tradition. It's kinda daft," I snorted.

It was just after five, so we lay down for an hour before we got ready. The wedding was just a formality for me now. I felt completely married to Haldir, and had since the day we bonded in the forest and the Inn the previous summer. We showered quickly and got dressed for the rehearsal. Roxy was staying at home, but she was pooped out from the hiking, so I fed her and Haldir walked her before we left. We walked over to the hotel gardens and met my family near where we were planning to have the ceremony. It was near a public walkway, but we didn't really care if there were lookie-loos. The reception was where most people would be, as the ceremony was just for family. We couldn't fit sixty people into the small garden, so they would watch from the windows of the reception room. After we'd walked through the ceremony a couple of times, the Judge bowed out and went off to his dinner party. We retired to Cardero's for our celebratory supper and took up a whole section of the restaurant. There were only eleven of us, but since Cardero's is not a big place to begin with, it made the place seem even smaller. June kept sending me meaningful looks as this was the same place that June and Michael had met up again at, mostly due to my interference.

After dinner, we broke up, and Haldir took me out of the restaurant before my mother could try and insist on my spending the night apart from my fiancé. We walked home and hit the pit as soon as we could. Haldir was tired from being around Alistair, as he says the boy wears him right out. I was tired from all the wedding stuff. I just wanted the day to be over and done with, so we could get on with our lives.

The next day, we spent making love until noon, and then we took Roxy out for a leisurely walk, before I was commandeered for the balance of the day. June showed up at four to take me to the hairstylist and get my makeup done. Our dresses were going to be at the hotel, with the wedding planner. I had made sure to eat properly so I wouldn't do something silly like faint. June was in the chair next to mine, as we had our hair set. We joked about my Mom and the wedding planner. They were a pair made in wedding hell. I was the only girl in my family and my Mom felt I should have the princess wedding, which the planner loved, until I put my foot down and insisted on low-key and elegant. As a concession, I allowed for a string quartet playing during the ceremony and part of the reception. I didn't want dancing, and I wanted to keep the vows short and sweet. June was with me on that one. Some of the stuff we'd come across in our research was incredible. It made me feel like women were set back a century from some of the stuff we'd read. I obey no one. Dumb promise in the first place.

At seven on the dot, my Dad escorted me to the Judge and Haldir. My Mom kept dabbing at her eyes as we said our vows in the garden. Several people stopped to watch. All I could concentrate on was Haldir. He looked at me the whole time with such an amazing amount of love. It would've been embarrassing if I didn't feel the exact same way. After the ceremony we entered the small ballroom off the garden to applause. We'd taken the wedding photos a week before, so all we had to do was get seated, and the balance of the evening could begin.

The reception was a simple affair too. Lamb was served, with a vegetarian option for those who didn't partake of meat. Dessert was a crème brulee. A couple of toasts and a speech later, and then it was time for me to toss the bouquet and for Haldir to toss the garter. We were showered with rose petals as we left the reception, and raced off in a chauffeured Rolls Royce. Dad had sprung for a night at the Opus hotel, before we flew out for our honeymoon in Hawaii.

As soon as we got into our suite at the hotel, we practically fell upon each other in a ravenous hunger. We made love on the couch, the bed, in the shower and in an easy chair by the window. It was like we hadn't touched each other in years, everything was so electric. I laughed as Haldir told me I'd be the death of him. I told him that'd be a first, for a guy who had seen more battles and hard times than I could imagine.

We fell asleep in each others arms under the soft hotel sheets. Happy and exhausted. Looking forward to the rest of our lives.


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter Thirteen-Aloha Mellon

Our flight out to the island of Maui was nerve wracking for me. It was the first time we had truly tested the passport, and even though I'd taken Haldir across the line into Bellingham a couple of times to test things, the customs guys hadn't swiped the passport, they just looked at it. The pre-clearing at YVR was more stringent. Haldir showed his passport and we crossed out fingers that it would work. Even though we passed through without incident, I couldn't relax until the plane taxied down the runway. Haldir laughed as he felt me sag once we got airborne.

The moment we landed in Maui, I just about kissed the ground. I hadn't realized exactly how nervous I was about getting Haldir to Hawaii; but with the abject paranoia sweeping the USA, I supposed I was afraid Haldir would be arrested and sent to Gitmo as a threat to American security or something asinine like that.

We got to the Grand Wailea Resort on the beach and checked into our Ocean Room. Haldir carried me across the threshold, much to the amusement of our bellhop, and laid me gently on the bed. I gave him a couple of bills to tip the bellhop with, and soon we were alone in our own tropical paradise.

"This is our honeymoon, correct?" Haldir asked, advancing upon me like a cat stalking his prey.

"Yes," I choked back a giggle.

"And we will be alone for as long as we desire?" he came closer.

"For the balance of the week, yes," I confirmed.

"Good," he stated as he silently leapt onto the bed. I started, as he placed himself over my now prone body. Bringing his face close to mine, he whispered, "I want to hear you scream." He unbuttoned my shirt and swept his hand over my breasts.

I gave in and began to laugh, "Scream eh? That's a good one."

Haldir growled deep in the back of his throat, "You have not been able to scream because of the thin walls in our home. We should not have such issues here."

I got a little nervous as his intense gaze swept my body. He pulled my shirt off and unzipped my skirt, yanking it down my thighs. I lay under him, clad only in my panties and my bra. I could feel dampness grow between my legs and my nipples harden, under the heat of his gaze. Usually Haldir was a gentle lover, holding me like a delicate doll, but he was treating me like his prey. A tasty tid-bit he wanted to eat right up.

Taking my bra, he unclipped it from behind and whipped it off my body. My nipples hardened in the cool air of the hotel room. His scent filled the room, smelling like spices and heat. Leaning down, he licked the tips of my nipples. It was like an electric current shot through my body with that tiny contact. Reaching between my legs, he pulled my panties to one side and inserted a finger, plunging it deep inside. I gasped at the intrusion, but my hips thrust to meet his hand.

"You're so wet," he whispered. All I could do was nod.

He leaned down and with a quick rip, tore the tiny bits of fabric from my body. I wanted to impale myself on him, but he pushed me down onto the bed as he moved to stand by the side. He quickly removed all of his clothing, and then spreading my legs apart, he knelt down between them, putting his face up close to my mons. I was shaking with sexual excitement, I wanted him so badly.

"You will be new again," he whispered to my wetness. My hips thrust aimlessly, as I craved his touch. He put an arm over my belly, and parting my lips with a couple of fingers, he dipped first one finger, then a second inside me. I perceived a firm stroking over my g-spot, and felt my wetness grow. His tongue laved my tiny bundle of nerves, and he began to suck it like a hard nipple. I was assaulted by sensations, as I built quickly to climax. He pulled his mouth away from my skin, just as I was about to crest.

"I want to hear you scream," he said softly, almost dangerously. I was in too much of a sexual haze to argue.

"I'll scream, I'll scream. Just make me come," I begged.

Deep laughter rumbled from his chest, as he went back to sucking me. The fingers inside me became more insistent, and I felt my body clench in one huge release. I cried out, letting my scream rip through the silence of the room. Haldir didn't stop sucking and stroking, and I felt tiny shudders rock my body as little after-climaxes rode me like a cowboy on his steed.

Haldir looked at me, with lust in his eyes, and he clambered up my body. Taking my legs, he placed them on his shoulders, before he plunged inside me so far, I thought he'd hit my larynx. He didn't thrust gently, like he used to, but he pounded me furiously. All I could do was gasp and moan, as I felt myself build again. I had never been touched like this, and I found I liked it. He wasn't rough or harsh; he was just a force of nature, bringing me out of the coma I had been existing in. Everything in the room jumped into sharp relief, as I cried out in pleasure. My climax tore through me like a tornado, and I screamed again with abandon. Haldir followed me and once we were finished, he collapsed upon me with a groan.

"Too much?" he asked as he pulled some sweaty hair out of his eyes.

"Oh god, no," I breathed, watching him sag in relief, "I've never been touched like that, and oh god, it was amazing."

He smiled, "I wanted you to know how much I want you. I want to be inside you all the time. You are like a drug, and I cannot get enough of you."

"So, you're like an addict? Of me?" I asked, trying not to smile.

He grinned rakishly, "Yes. I desire you like an animal desires to mate. I know we cannot be like this at home, but I wanted you to know just how much I want you."

I wanted to laugh at his flowery language, but he was serious, so I let it slide. We fell asleep on top of the bed, exhausted from the trip, and the lovemaking.

We had dinner that night at, I kid you not, and this is the place's real name, 'Humuhumunukunukuapua'a', which was located in the resort. I didn't try to mutilate the name; I just let everybody else give it a shot. At least the staff could pronounce it without any difficultly. We ate overlooking calm seas, and watched the sunset in a fiery show of reds, purples and oranges.

Our first night was capped off with a walk along the water's edge on the white sand beach. The quiet only interrupted by other couple's evening strolls under the moonlight, as we nodded to each couple in greeting. The warm tropical breeze off the ocean made me a bit randy again, and we retired to make love in our room before we dropped off to sleep.

Our week in Hawaii was spent between making love and playing in the pool and the ocean. We went out for dinner a couple of times in Kihei and in Lahaina, and made it out to Ka'anapali for drinks and a walk along their beach. I'd arranged a tour out to Hana and we lucked out when we did our bike ride down Haleakala, as we didn't have any clouds the entire day. I was told by the chap who ran the bike ride tour, that as Haleakala was a tall dormant volcano, more days than not there'd be clouds clinging to the slopes around the apex. We didn't get a deep tan though. I was adamant about the use of the SPF 30, so we just attained a golden glow, which was fine with me. Plus, we made love every chance we got. At one point on our road trip to Hana, Haldir got so ramped up, I had to pull over in a rest stop so we could make love in the back seat of our rental car. I drove the rest of the way with the windows down, so the poor guy at the rental place wouldn't get a spunky smelling car back.

We left the Saturday following our arrival for home, and I was exhausted from the whirlwind trip. By the time we dragged our asses back into the apartment, it was all I could do to stay awake. We left our luggage in the living room, as we stripped off our clothes and fell asleep on top of the bed, clinging to each other like the last two people on the planet earth.

We woke up in a sweaty mess as I had forgotten to turn on the air-conditioning before we went to bed. I staggered down the hallway, and climbing over to the window, I flipped the switch, and turned it up to maximum. The cold air, dried my sweat quickly, and my nipples leapt to attention, as I turned to see my husband standing in all his glory before me.

"You left our bed," he said quietly, looking for all the world like he'd eat me up.

"Air conditioning," I supplied.

Crossing the floor in a second, he swept me up into his arms, as he sat down on the couch, with me straddling his naked lap. "I wanted to wake you up nicely," he growled.

"Do it now. I'm not quite awake," I whispered throatily.

He shifted underneath me and I felt him penetrate me. I wasn't quite dry, as his look and words had already affected me, but he was careful as I wasn't quite ready for his girth. Slowly we rocked back and forth as we stared into each other's eyes. His fingers slipped between my legs as he caressed my nub, and I felt the flood of desire and pleasure rush through my body. He lifted me up and slid me along his erection, and I positioned my knees to help him. Our rocking soon turned feverish, and I had to stuff my hand into my mouth so I wouldn't scream. The week of being able to cry out with abandon had spoilt me, and now we were back in the place with thin walls. We climaxed quickly and I lay down against his chest, breathing hard from the exertion.

"Welcome home my wife," he whispered in my ear.

"Welcome home my husband," I whispered back.

It felt good to call him my husband and have him call me his wife. I never thought I would see the day I got married, but here it was and we were truly wed.

Our weekend was quiet, as we got Roxy back from Alistair. I had purchased Alistair some goodies, which included the obligatory Aloha shirt, puka shell necklace, macadamia nuts and a tacky Nani dashboard doll. Alistair had begged me for the Nani doll, as he said it carried quite a bit of cachet with a few of his friends. I knew exactly who he meant too. They were twisted buggers. Roxy, of course was delighted to see us, and we took her out for several long walks before I had to return to work on the Monday.

Haldir got back into his routine of making dinner, and cleaning up around the place. He'd ride my bike over to Granville Island during the day to pick up stuff for dinner every evening. Back when I taught him to ride, I was astounded by how quickly he had picked it up, but he told me his kind was physically adept. Now, he rode in and out of traffic like an old pro, and I was saving to get him a bike of his own, complete with saddlebags and water bottle. I didn't mind supporting Haldir, as I knew once we figured out how to get him a Social Insurance Card, he'd be able to begin working to help out. I knew I'd be the bread-winner for the family, and I was completely okay with that. I really enjoyed coming home to a cozy place, with dinner on the table and laundry done and put away. I always rewarded Haldir properly, but it felt like I was getting just as much pleasure as he did out of the whole deal.

Soon, the months passed and it was the beginning of Fall. Haldir and I had begun to look for a new apartment, in a cement building. One, it was safer in a fire, and two, I found I liked to be vocal during lovemaking, and the only time I got to be vocal was when we went away for the weekend, which was less than once a month. Plus, we wanted to start a family, so I wanted another bedroom for the possible baby. I had just gone off the Depo-Provera in September, but it could be several years before my fertility might even out, as I had been on the shot for over a decade. My doctor had told me that since I had been on the shot for so long, it wasn't unusual not to be able to conceive for a few years. I was okay with that, but just in case, I thought it would be practical to have the extra room.

In late October, the promotion I had applied for came through as I won the competition. I was moved from an AS-02 to and AS-05, and was now in a management position. This extra income would come in handy to help Haldir and I out financially, but the added stress meant Haldir would need to support me more as I would be stretched to my limit. I was now in charge of my department, and I knew that certain people would try and take advantage of my friendship, so I needed Haldir to act as a sounding board. He was up for the challenge, as I would come home from work, whipped from dealing with people above me and below me; and he'd have dinner, a hot bath and a massage ready to go for me. The nights I was too tired to make love, he'd treat me to love-making for one, letting me have my release and fall asleep. He changed my diet and made me follow an exercise regime to increase my stamina and improve my mood. By December I was almost back to normal, and I felt less stressed at work, as well as having more energy to make love to my husband.

Christmas was a cornucopia of noise, food and loads of parties. Haldir and I had been invited to five different Christmas parties, two of which were from people I didn't personally know. Haldir had taken my advice to heart about being friendlier with the locals, and had become good friends with our butcher on Granville Island and one of the artisans that had a studio down on the Island. This guy was a glass blower, and when we attended his party, he had thoughtfully given me a lovely glass figurine of a swan. I didn't know what to say, so I thanked him as best I could. He leaned in and told me that Haldir had been telling him about how beautiful I was, so he had decided to make me something to reflect that opinion.

The Christmas dinner was held again at my brother's and everyone kept looking at us, as though they were waiting for some big announcement. I finally let everyone down easy, telling them I wasn't pregnant yet, and could they give a girl a break, as we were trying as hard as we could. Made my Mom blush, my Dad cough into his napkin, and my sister-in-law laugh her ass off. I liked Patricia a lot. She knew how to set the right mood.

As the New Year bloomed, I began having those disturbing dreams, exactly the same as the ones I had before I met Haldir. I dreamt I was running down Howe St, and I saw Haldir disappear again. This time, I kinda knew why I was so upset. I knew I couldn't go with him, but I didn't want him to go even though I knew he had to leave. I would wake in a sweat every morning early, before the sun rose. Haldir would be concerned and ask me if I had the dream again, and I would nod; and then he would rock me back to sleep. I had no idea why this was happening, especially now, but the dreams were a nightly occurrence.

By the middle of January, I was beside myself with these repetitive dreams. Work was starting to suffer, as I wasn't getting enough sleep; so Haldir was making me go to bed right after supper. He would clean up, take Roxy out, and then climb into bed with me. We started making love after I would get home from work, and I learned how to make love in the shower, in the hallway, and on the dining room table. We were still having to figure out a comfortable way to make love on the kitchen counter, but Haldir and I made it into a game, to see if we could make love on every surface in the apartment. I was tired when I got home, but Haldir would greet me in nothing but a smile and that would be enough to get me going. I'm sure Roxy thought her owners were crazy, but she put up with us.

One night, I had the oddest dream. Except it wasn't a dream. Haldir and I were in this space, it had no colour, no shape, but I could feel that it was big. It felt like a huge space. I couldn't make out what we were standing on, but it felt solid. I looked at Haldir and he reached out and took my hand.

"Are we dreaming?" I asked.

"No. You are not," a strange voice answered me.

An elderly gentleman came into view, with a long beard and hair, wearing white robes, and carrying a staff. "She has bonded to you?" The question was directed to Haldir.

"Yes Mithrandir," Haldir confirmed, "Susan, this is Mithrandir, a powerful Maia from my homeland. Mithrandir, this is my wife, Susan."

"A pleasure," he nodded towards me, "This complicates things mellon."

Haldir looked chagrined, "I was sent to another world without my permission, and you have the gall to tell me this complicates things?"

Mithrandir had the decency to look abashed, "I apologize. We had to get you out of there before you were killed."

I was shocked, "Killed? What is he talking about Haldir?"

"I was in the middle of a battle, and things were not looking very positive for me," he admitted, "Before I knew it, I was standing in the middle of the road, and you came along."

"Thank you for assisting my friend," Mithrandir told me, "But we have need of you once again, mellon."

"Why? What is happening?" Haldir sounded upset.

"You must return. There is another task for you, before you can cross to the Blessed Lands."

"I'm not going to Aman. I have decided to stay with my wife, and live among the Race of Men," Haldir resolutely told him.

"You are Edhel! You are among the Firstborn! You must cross. You do not have the same choice as the Peredhil! You must cross or fade!"

I didn't like the sound of that, "You can't die Haldir! I love you! You can't die!"

Mithrandir smiled gently at me, "He will not if he crosses, but he cannot stay with you."

I began to tear up as I realized the prediction I had made the year before on Vancouver Island was coming true. Haldir would go home without me. I would lose the only person I had ever loved truly and totally.

"No. I am staying with my wife," Haldir stubbornly spoke.

Mithrandir looked like he was about to get very frustrated. He looked at me and then back at Haldir. "Wait here. I must confer with my associates." He walked away into the mistiness.

While we waited, I hugged Haldir close, "I know you don't want to leave. I don't want you to leave either, but I think you have to go. It's like my dream was warning us this would happen."

"No. I will not leave you. I want you to bear my children. I want to see you grow old…" he whispered into my hair.

"Won't you grow old?" I asked, interrupting him.

"No. I am Edhel. I am an Elf. We are immortal, unless we are killed in battle or we fade if we lose someone we love."

I buried my face into his chest, "I can't let you fade. I don't know what happens to you if you fade. I'll live again, reincarnation is the cornerstone of my belief system, but unless you die like me, I can't guarantee where you'll end up."

"In the Halls of Mandos," Haldir told me, "I will reside in the Halls of Mandos."

I shook as I cried, "You have to do what you need to stay alive."

"I'm staying with you," he firmly told me.

Mithrandir returned, "You need to come back Haldir. I cannot change that, but there will be a provision for your bride."

I perked up, "Provision?"

Mithrandir took my hand, "You will join him once the crisis has been averted. Then we will figure out what to do with you." He patted my hand gently, "You have thrown a horseshoe into the mix, m'dear. But we will overcome."

"I cannot help if I met my fëa mate!" Haldir tossed his head angrily.

"So we see mellon. So we see," Mithrandir shook his head, "None of us could have predicted your mate to live in this world. Not one of us thought to check before we sent you."

"Someone knew," I spoke up.

Mithrandir pierced me with his gaze. "I mean, the whole week before Haldir came to me, I'd been having these dreams. And well, here he is," I finished lamely.

Mithrandir pulled a pipe out of the depths of his robe and began to prep it. "Indeed? Well, this deserves some extra attention," He lit the pipe and began to puff upon it, "Haldir, you will need to leave tomorrow evening. Prepare yourself. I will send you the coordinates for you to cross. You, my lady, will have to be patient. I will contact you when it is time for you to cross. Be vigilant."

With that, the communication was cut off and we were sent back in a swirl of mist. I awoke panting in Haldir's arms.

"You are really going aren't you?" I asked fearfully.

"Yes, but you will follow me," he held me close, "Especially if I have anything to do with it."

I cried against his chest, "I knew this would happen!"

"It will be fine my love. Please do not cry so. Let me spend the last hours with you, making love to my wife," he kissed me gently.

I leaned over and picked up the phone, "Let me call in to work then." Once I had called in sick, we spent the rest of the day making lazy love, eating in bed, and leaving the apartment only to take Roxy out and get some fresh air.

By six pm, Haldir had gathered his belongings, put on the clothes he wore the day I met him, and we walked out into the evening gloom. A light rain had started, so I opened my umbrella, and we walked to the coordinates in silence. He stopped us at the foot of Howe Street, and smiled.

"It is time," he ruefully told me.

"I'll miss you something terrible," I kissed him.

"I will yearn for your return to me," he whispered in my ear, "I love you Susan. Never forget."

"I won't," I tearfully told him.

The street was deserted with only a couple of passing cars left over from the evening exodus. Haldir let go of my hand and stepped over the line, disappearing into thin air.

I collapsed on the ground, sobbing in my grief.

Mellon - my friend

Fëa – spirit

Maia- lesser (non-Vala) Ainur


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter Fourteen-Journey Into Time and Space

The rain started to get heavier, and I sat on the cold wet cement of the sidewalk, letting myself get soaked. I had watched my husband disappear into thin air, an impossibility, and I had let him go. His disappearance made his situation more real to me. Even though I knew he was an elf, a different race from humans, I never really accepted the fact he was different from me. Even though I had never seen a physical specimen as perfect as Haldir, he had faults too. I wrapped his package up in my personal belief that he was just like anybody else-a little different, but in a good way. Now he was gone, and I had no idea if that Mithrandir chap was as good as his word.

I choked back a hiccupy sob, and pulled myself together. I had to get back to Roxy, and put our plan into action. Haldir and I had decided to go with a story about him getting called back home suddenly, on a family emergency. I would have to tell my family and our friends and be vague as to when he was coming home. That was the truth, the only thing that we were lying about was that Haldir wasn't in Norway, he was in Arda. I hoped I would get a message that I would be going to him soon, but until that moment came, I was on my own.

Getting up off the wet sidewalk, I staggered back to the apartment. Roxy greeted me excitedly, dancing around my feet, and looking for Haldir.

I bent down and ruffled Roxy's fur, "He's gone home baby. Haldir won't be around for a while." Or possibly forever, I thought sadly.

I wasn't hungry, but I fixed Roxy her dinner and fiddled with a piece of toast for myself. I felt physically ill, and the thought of food was making me nauseous. I ended up dumping the toast in the garbage, and sat down to watch Roxy eat. She picked at her meal, clearly picking up on my distress, so I got up and moved to the living room. Plopping down on the couch, I channel surfed for a few hours, before I crawled down the hall and got into bed. I wasn't tired; I just couldn't deal with being upright anymore. I had no one to talk to, no one to make love with, and no one to rock me to sleep in his arms. My husband was gone and I didn't know what to do with myself.

I tossed and turned, sleeping fitfully. When daylight broke, I crawled out of bed, moving my misery to the couch. Staying in my pyjamas all day, I alternated staring mindlessly at the TV, poking at the computer, and lying on the couch, staring at the ceiling.

Around noon, I called my parents and told them the news. My Dad was stoic as usual. He remarked that he hoped Haldir's family was going to be all right, and should he require any assistance, to let them know. Mom was understandably upset. She doesn't like it when things are out of order, and my not being with my husband was not proper. Dad told me he'd let the rest of the family know, and if I needed any help, to call. Dad has always been helpful in a crunch.

I spent the weekend in and out of bed, but entirely in my pyjamas. Roxy was walked, when I asked Alistair to come by. Once he found out what had happened, he took over, taking Roxy out, cooking for me, and making sure I showered. He would've gotten into the shower with me, but out of respect to Haldir, he merely stood at the door and shouted instructions. Steve was dragged into my hole, when Alistair had to go out and get me some supplies; staying with me and trying to get me to play a game of checkers. I lost on purpose to make him go away.

When I went back to work on the Monday, Alistair walked me to work, bringing me lunch and making me eat. Steve would pick me up and walk me home. Either Steve or Alistair would be with me at all times when I was at home; as Alistair was worried I might try and hurt myself. I barely slept, hardly ate, and I felt like a huge piece of my soul had been ripped out of me the minute Haldir had left.

The days turned into weeks, weeks into months, and soon it was coming up on our 1st wedding anniversary, with no message from Mithrandir, and no Haldir. My parents circled the wagons, getting angry with Haldir on my behalf. I told them not to be angry, but all they could see was a daughter who was in pain, missing her husband. The week before our anniversary, I booked all my vacation time that I had coming, and told my office I was taking a much needed sabbatical. I figured I would go to Mexico and bake until I was a lobster, then I'd cocoon until I had to go back to work. The night before I was to go on vacation, and two days before my wedding anniversary, I was contacted.

Mithrandir pulled me into the hazy nothingness, and greeted me with a smile.

"Good day my lady," he bowed slightly as he greeted me.

"Mithrandir," I said coolly, "That business certainly took long enough. May I see my husband please?"

"All in good time my dear. All in good time," he pulled out his pipe, prepping it, "It seems that you are in good company." His pause made me wave my hand for him to go on. "It seems you have some very important Valar placing their loyalties with you and your mate. It also seems that they have been preparing the way for you to be with your husband in the manner in which you require."

My heart surged with hope, "What do you mean?"

"I mean, that you must go to the same place you saw your husband leave, and cross over tomorrow evening at the same time as he left."

"I'll need to bring some things," I said, "I can't leave Roxy behind."

"Who is Roxy?"

"Our dog. She's never been without us for long, a week at the most. She has to come," I pleaded. I wanted our family to be together, even if it wasn't at home.

Mithrandir grimaced, "All right. The dog can come. You will enter Arda a day from the gates of Lorien, and you will be met by the Galadhrim. They will guide you to your husband. Be careful though, danger still exists as the remnants of yrch still wander the woods, looking for prey."

I nodded, "May I bring along some things from home?"

"Whatever you can carry. But the journey is hard, so be prepared," he warned.

"Thank you," I said, "Will I see you there?"

"No, no. I will be along a while after you settle in. The Lady of Lorien will travel with my group, as we make our way to Aman," he puffed thoughtfully on his pipe, "But has yet to become clear to me as to what your fate will be."

I didn't know what to say to this, so I remained silent.

"Well, I know you're husband will be happy to see you. He has complained incessantly about not having you with him," he waved at me, "He can be quite vocal about what he desires."

At that, I was pulled back into the mist, and woke up in my bed. It was a disconcerting method of communication, but since I knew that Haldir's home was not as technologically advanced as mine, I figured it must be de rigueur. I couldn't get back to sleep, so I got up in the pre-dawn light and began to pack.

Haldir had told me a little bit about his home, and I knew that roads were a rarity. So I packed a variety of clothing in my back-pack, strapping my light sleeping pad to the bottom. Haldir had tried to get me into camping, and we'd bought me a MEC Women's Bora 75 Backpack, which I felt was too big for a weekend away, but Haldir wanted to err on the side of caution. I was now glad he had pressed for the big pack. While I hated roughing it, I knew I'd need the room for the stuff I wanted to bring him. He was in the middle of a book, and I knew he had left it on purpose. I packed it, and made sure I had some of Haldir's clothes, and packed my own clothes judiciously. I didn't want to be caught unprepared for any weather eventualities. I put the bear spray in the side pocket, for easy access, and made sure I brought out the water purifying tablets and all our first aid stuff.

Going into the kitchen, I put a month of Roxy's dry food into a couple of large Ziploc storage bags, and made a list of the food I may need. I would have to hit the pharmacy to get some meds for the just-in-case scenario, but that would have to wait. I knew I'd have to tell Alistair, and arrange for him to look in on our apartment for a while. I moved enough money out of our savings account into the chequing account, to cover the automatic bill payments, and I set a few of the irregular bills on an auto-transfer. I didn't know how long I'd be gone, so I wrote out a provisional plan, in case we didn't come home. Where to ship my stuff, how to let people know what happened. The sort of stuff you did when you expected to die. But I didn't think of it that way. I figured I'd be happy to live where ever Haldir was, and I could make concessions. I had to. I couldn't be without him like this again.

Alistair was shocked I was going, but when he heard I was going to reunite with Haldir, he swore he'd do anything to help. I told him there was a possibility that he may never see either of us again, and he retorted that he'd better, or he was giving away my whole book collection to a junk collector. He knew that would piss me off.

Alistair had agreed to walk me to the jump-off point, mostly because he was having a hard time believing me about how I was going to get there. We walked through the warm summer evening, chatting about everything and anything. Once we got to the foot of Howe, Alistair stopped me.

"I'm gonna miss you," he said, "I know you'll be back. I just really love you, and I'm gonna miss you."

"I love you too Al. You keep Mom and Dad sane, and hopefully we'll be back before you know it," I hugged him close, "Remember, you're family. If you need anything, call Dad, but don't tell him where I am really."

"I don't know where you are, really," Alistair retorted good naturedly.

At the prescribed time, I took Roxy's leash, and pulled her to me close. Turning, I waved to Alistair, and with one step I crossed the threshold. Immediately, the city disappeared and we were thrown onto hard dirt. Brushing some dirt off my face, I made sure Roxy was with me, and I took a look around. We were deep in some forest, with the biggest trees I had ever seen.

Let me just explain something to you. I live in British Columbia. BC. The province where forestry is the number two industry. Trees are our business. We have many countries angry at us for what we do to our trees, except they're just jealous because they went and ruined their forests centuries ago. We still have centuries to screw around before we become what they are. I used to work with a lot of the forestry workers, helping them between seasons, so I know what trees are all about. I've been to old growth forest, walked through ancient rainforest, and I've seen trees thousands of years old. I've even been to sequoia country, and seen these shallow rooted trees that span higher than some sky-scrapers. The trees Roxy and I stood under put those gentle giants to shame.

They were taller than anything I could even imagine. They had to be taller than the Sheraton Wall Centre. The forest floor was bare, due to the lack of continuous light from the high thick foliage thousands of feet up. I was startled out of my reverie by a hand on my shoulder.

I bit down on a cry, and turned to see a tall blond man, correction, elf, standing behind me. He looked eerily like Haldir. Two more tall blond elves appeared beside him. They were so silent; I couldn't hear the ground beneath their feet as they moved.

The first one said only one word, "Come." Motioning me to follow him.

Roxy happily tugged at the leash as she ran to his side. I figured they were related to Haldir in some way, so I followed. Shifting my pack, I changed hands holding the leash, and I tried to keep up. These guys had nothing in their arms, or on their backs, save for a quiver full of arrows, a bow, and a short sword. They moved stealthily, and left no trail. I was the opposite. I moved at a walk-run pace, breathing deep controlled breaths, concentrating solely on keeping pace. Just as the sun began to set, or at least I thought it was setting, as the forest lost the mottled light it did have, and a grey light seeped in; the elves stopped and motioned we would rest for the night.

The first elf motioned for me to sit, and crouching beside me, he poked himself and said, "Rúmil."

I smiled and pointed to myself, "Susan."

He grinned and said, "Haldir hervess!"

"If you mean wife, yes. Hervess," I said, still smiling.

He poked himself again and said, "Muindor."

I looked at him quizzically, not understanding him.

He stared at me, as though searching for a word. He finally mangled, "Bro-ther."

"Muindor means brother?" I asked excitedly. It seemed Haldir was sharing the wealth, regarding English.

He nodded, and pointed to me, "Wife."

"Yes!" I patted him on the back, "That's right."

He got up and motioned for me to stay where I was. The other elves had already gathered firewood, and were starting a fire and preparing food to cook. I pulled out my water purifying tablets and dropped one into the cup that was offered to me. They looked at me oddly, and I made a motion that I'd be sick if I drank the water without the tablet. They totally didn't understand me, so I reached into my pack and brought out a bar of chocolate. I had a whole box in my pack, mostly for Haldir, as I liked liquorice more. I decided to introduce them to chocolate would get them to ignore my odd eating habits. I broke off three pieces and gave each elf a chunk. They popped it into their mouths and looked at me in surprise.

"Let it melt," I advised, "It's chocolate."

Rúmil stuck the chunk in the corner of his cheek and said over a gob of saliva, "Choc-o-lat!"

I nodded, "Don't lose it." Motioning him to keep sucking, "I gather Haldir told you about his favourite treat?"

Rúmil just looked at me happily, mumbling 'choc-o-lat', through his slurps of the sweet treat. I laughed and swirled the water around in my cup. I couldn't drink it for a couple of hours, so I grabbed a pot out of my pack and poured some of the water from the skin they were using into it. I poured just enough to give me water for the evening. I then poured the cup of water I had into an empty water bottle, to sit and activate. The elves watched me purify my water with interest. I did not have the luxury of a perfect immune system like they apparently did, as they got the water from a river running not too far from where we sat. I was afraid of getting beaver fever, even with fast running water, as bacteria like cryptosporidium didn't care if it was in fast running water or still water.

Dinner was fresh caught rabbit, another food I had never tried. I was allergic to bunny fur, but I hoped it didn't include their meat, or I would be in apparent trouble. I had brought six epi-pens with me, just in case. Roxy was given some too, which she relished with gusto. I was relieved when an hour after we ate, I had not blown up and my throat had not closed. I unrolled my bedroll, and pulled out my thermal blanket, crawling under as Rúmil motioned for me to. Exhaustion from walking so fast for so long had me asleep with Roxy by my side.

The next morning I was awake by first light, and saw the elves had already packed the camp away. I folded my blanket, tucking it back into my pack, and rolled up by bedroll, strapping it back to my pack. Taking a swing of the now-treated water, I grimaced as one of the elves handed me a small wafer. I looked at it quizzically and broke off a piece, eating it slowly. It was a little mealy, but good, and quite filling. We got underway quickly, and soon were back up to their breakneck pace. Stopping a couple of times, so the poor human girl could catch her breath, we came upon the gates of what I assumed was Lorien just after supper. The guards standing above the wooden structure called out, and one of the huge doors swung slowly open. We slid through and it closed as soon as we were clear.

I was astounded by the beauty of the place before me. I couldn't really say it was a city, although Haldir had told me it was. But it was beautiful. Staircases wrapped around trees, leading up to platforms high in the canopy. I saw fabric and greenery, so I assumed it was a city that was akin to the rainforest living arrangements like those in the Amazon, where swinging platforms were strung between trees and tents perched in branches as scientists studied the life in the high canopy. I remembered watching a PBS documentary on it and was fascinated. These platforms were different though, as they were much bigger, and seemed to blend in with the tree itself. No garish coloured Gore-Tex to show where people were from the foliage. I finally looked down and before me stood my husband, looking for all the world like a thirsty man who had found water.

I dropped my pack, and leapt into his arms. Laughing and crying and kissing him as though my breath depended on it. He swung me around laughing and kissing me, holding me so tight I had to pant for breath.

"You are here! You are finally here!" his cry was joyous as he kissed me.

"Oh my god! I missed you so much! Don't ever leave me again!" I admonished.

Roxy barked and Haldir laughed and reached down to ruffle her fur, "I missed you too, girl. I am glad you came."

I held him tightly, "This is your home?"

"Yes, Susan. You have met my brother Rúmil, and this is my other brother Orophin," he turned me to greet a carbon copy of Rúmil.

I laughed, "Two brothers! Now I know why you weren't overwhelmed at family gatherings."

"We did cause trouble in our youth," Haldir admitted, "I will take you to our talan, so you may freshen up. The Lady wishes to meet you before you retire this evening."

"So no happy reunion until afterwards?" I asked slyly.

"No," he growled, "It has been hard enough waiting for you this long. I had to 'pester' a great number of persons to get you here this early. They wanted to wait longer, but I would have none of it."

I smiled happily, "I'm just glad they didn't renege on our deal."

"As am I," he said softly in my ear.

He led me up one of the staircases, carrying my pack easily. We entered a platform home, that he had called a talan. There was a wooden door, and opaque cloth surrounded the outside. A thatched roof kept out the elements. He set my pack down by another door, and hugged me close.

"I missed you, but we have no time to celebrate our reunification. Get cleaned up with that bowl of water, and I will bring you your dress."

"Dress? Pardon?" I grabbed the cloth he had set out for me and dipped it in the water.

"The Lady of the Wood expects my wife. You have become a lady of station, and need to be dressed as such," Haldir walked into one of the rooms and came out holding a gossamer dress. "I am Marchwarden of Lorien. You need to reflect my role here."

He pulled off my shirt and shorts, kissing every inch of skin that he bared. I sighed as I cleaned my arms and neck. Untying my boots, he helped me out of them, pulling my socks off as he went. He grabbed the other cloth and dampened it, swiping it down my legs and wiping my feet. It was so tender, it became erotic. I wanted to forget the meeting with the Lady of the Wood and just make love with my husband.

"I remembered your sizing, but it seems you have lost a bit of weight," he commented as he helped me into the gown.

"I was upset after you left," I answered quietly.

He tied the lacing up, "I know. I felt your pain. I am sorry I hurt you like that."

"Couldn't be helped," I answered as cheerily as I could muster, "It was just the way things happened."

"Did…"

"Alistair and Steve helped me. And my family. They're pretty pissed at you by the way," I added.

He laughed, "Well they have a right to be. But I am glad Alistair and Steve were by your side. I do not think I could have left you if I did not know you had their help."

"I wouldn't have let you go," I admitted, "They made me eat, shower and sleep. For a month afterwards, I was never alone. They took turns sleeping on our couch, and you'll never guess what happened."

Haldir just looked at me.

"They got engaged. In April. They told me that if I hadn't cracked up, they wouldn't have tested their relationship as hard as they had. And they said because of that, they knew they couldn't live without each other. They knew they needed each other in their lives. So they are going to get married."

"That is good news!" Haldir looked pleased.

"Yes, but they have a proviso. Alistair said he wouldn't marry Steve until we got back, because we have to act as his witnesses. Steve is adamant about that too."

Haldir looked pensive at the news, "I do not know if we will be able to get home. I hope we will. Did you tell them we may never see them again?"

"Yup. And Alistair said if we didn't come back, he'd give all my books to a junk dealer."

Haldir shuddered for me, "We will have to find a way back then."

"No kidding. So do I look presentable?" I twirled in the dress for him.

"You are a vision. Come, let us meet the Lady," he took my arm and led me out the door.

We walked for some time on the wooden walkways that ran between the trees, until we came upon another staircase. Haldir led me up the sweeping stairs ad we came out upon a lovely terraced garden suspended between two of the large trees. Haldir bowed suddenly and pulled me down into a curtsey.

I felt something touch my mind and then I heard a voice say clearly, "Please rise."

Before me stood the woman from my dream after Haldir and I had bonded. She smiled and spoke in a clear tinkly voice.

"Susan, it is so good to meet my Marchwarden's fëar mate. You are a lovely woman, to take him in and cherish him so," she took my hand in hers, and I felt a swell of love in my heart.

Tears came to my eyes and I said, "I dreamed you. Did you dream me?"

"We spoke through the dreamtime. You have a gift for walking in the dreamtime. I believe it was why Haldir was led to you. You are a gentle soul, a good match for his temperament."

I felt a fat tear run down my face, as Haldir gently rubbed it away. "He did have a bit of an attitude issue when I met him," I admitted.

"Thank you for your patience and for loving him the way you do. We will talk tomorrow, once you have had some rest. But I believe your husband has not been able to greet you properly as yet?" an impish grin flashed across her face.

Haldir blushed, and bowing he said, "Thank you my lady."

"You will be at breakfast?" she asked.

"Yes my lady," he said stiffly, seeming to be embarrassed.

A tinkly laugh came up from her dainty throat, "You have your leave to attend to your wife Marchwarden. Greet her in a manner that befits your station."

I curtsied and Haldir led me back to our talan. It was if the moment we left her presence, the lights around us dimmed a little. The awe and love she inspired in me left me feeling a little wondrous, but I remembered I was in the arms of my husband, and we entered our talan, greeting Roxy, who was just happy we had not left her alone for too long.

Haldir whispered in my ear, "Tonight, I want you to scream. I want the entire city to know you are mine."

I blushed as he began to undress me.

Hervess-Wife

Muindor-Brother


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter Fifteen-To Have and To Hold

Once I was naked, Haldir led me into the bedroom, where a slender bed lay open for our use. Haldir had pulled back the light covers and gently laid me down on the surprisingly soft bed. He quickly undressed himself, tossing the clothes carelessly near the door.

Crawling over top of me, he kissed every inch of my face while he said, "I want to make love to every bit of your body. I want you to know how much I have missed you and how much I love you. I want you to know I will never leave your side again."

I pulled his face in line with mine and kissed him as deeply as I was capable of, and said, "I know." I knew how much he loved me. He said it with every touch, every look, every action. Words were not necessary to express his feelings to me. I knew.

Haldir smiled at me, and moved down my body, placing kisses down my chest and paying special attention to each of my breasts. He moved slowly and with deliberation down my belly, and finally came to his destination at the apex of my thighs. By the time he arrived, I was completely ready for him. I was so turned on I was shaking. I felt one finger slid inside me, and then another, as he sucked and licked me into a delirium. I couldn't have stifled a cry if I had shoved my entire fist inside my mouth. The force of the climax ripped a scream right out of my throat, and left me shaking like a leaf in Haldir's arms.

"Oh. My. God," was all I could croak out.

A rich baritone rumble of laughter bubbled up from Haldir's chest, as he softly said, "I told you I missed you."

I laughed softly, "I missed you and your magic fingers."

Haldir rubbed my belly, "My magic fingers missed this as well."

He pulled himself level with me and parted my legs a little farther apart. I felt him at my entrance, and as he kissed me, he slid in. It was a bit of a fit as I had not made love to him in six months and I had tightened up a bit. I sighed as his pelvis met mine. It felt like home.

Haldir began thrusting; kissing every bit of skin he could reach. I touched his face, stroked his back, and grabbed his butt. Haldir stopped momentarily, moving my legs over his shoulders, so he could go deeper. I groaned as he came into contact over and over with that internal spot. My hips thrust to meet his, as tiny cries of ecstasy were emitted from my throat. Haldir sped up his thrusting as I clenched my pelvic muscles in time with his rhythm. Pools of sweat from the exertion gathered between my breasts, my legs, and on my belly, as I lost myself in the rhapsody of sensations we made together. I felt like every molecule of my being had fully merged with Haldir's, and we were essentially one being making love to itself. Then, I lost my sense of self and what made me an individual at that moment. Everything fell away. The room, the bed, Haldir, myself; everything fell away and yet was extremely present. We existed and didn't exist, all at the same time. I felt like what constituted me had stepped outside the boundaries of me, and I existed and not existed, completely connected to everything all at once. An explosion of energy ripped through the universe, and I fell back into my self, letting the waves of the climax rip through me like a heavy tide.

Haldir collapsed on me, breathing heavily, before he rolled off to my side. I stretched my legs out and curled into his body, as the sweat from our skin dried in the cool night air.

"Did you feel that, when we were making love?" I asked, wondering if Haldir had the same experience as I did.

"Yes," Haldir spoke softly, his breath tickling my ear, "It was wondrous."

I nodded, and kissed his arm that was wrapped around my front.

"I believe we have also made the entire city aware of our love as well," he remarked drily.

I giggled, "What's that crap people say about time?"

"I have no idea, but I believe our time spent apart resulted in a rather cataclysmic rejoining," he shrugged and laughed, "I am sure your scientists would want to study it."

I poked his arm, "It was definitely worth studying."

He kissed my ear, "It was at that. Let us rest now, as first light will come sooner than we expect."

I fell asleep in his arms, as Roxy crawled into the room and lay down beside our bed.

The next morning, Haldir woke me with kisses, and helped my sore body get up out of bed. I couldn't believe how our lovemaking had made me feel like I had run a marathon and then some. I was going to get into a pair of pants, but Haldir opened a wooden wardrobe door and showed me several dresses he had made for me. Matching shoes in the softest leather sat below each dress. I felt a mixture of gratitude for Haldir's thoughtfulness and trepidation regarding my ability to pull off this complicated look. I now have maybe four skirts and dresses in my wardrobe. I am not the most graceful person, and as such, I usually stick to pants in order to prevent any ungainly flashing incidents. The dresses Haldir had made for me were long, but quite a bit of cleavage showed from the low necklines. I had noticed the women I had seen the previous night were rather small busted, so I guess this sort of décolletage wouldn't be so unseemly for them. For me, it was another story. While I didn't have huge boobs, they were a generous handful, and I was worried about the cup that runneth over. Did I mention that I was practical? Notoriously so. It's why Alistair believed I would be more likely to clean my apartment than shag a cute guy.

Haldir helped me into one of the beautiful gossamer garments, and as he tied me into the dress, I looked down and noticed a difference. My bust wasn't hanging out for all to gawk at. I looked at my husband, who just smiled and kissed me.

"I know you are a modest woman. I had the tailors and seamstresses raise the bodice, so you would not feel as though you were on display," he caressed my covered breast, "Do you approve?"

"Uh, yeah!" I kissed him, "I was a little worried about being 'on display' so to speak, and the fact you remembered about my little issue relieves me to no end."

"I remember everything about you," he said softly, "I even remember that you do not drink alcohol, and I smelled that water you brought with you. It smells terrible. What did you put in it?"

"A water purification tablet. You can't smell cryptosporidium, y'know," I replied.

"Susan, you are in Arda. We do not have the same diseases as you do on Earth. And here in Lorien, the water is the purest of all. It comes directly from crystal clear springs that are completely safe."

I looked up at him in surprise, "But I thought you told me that the race of men were not as advanced in terms of sanitation?"

"They are not, which is why I do not want you to visit their cities. You will become sick from their water supply. But in Elven lands you are safe to drink from any stream, river or pool," he gave me a cup of water to drink, "Taste. You will not have tasted anything so pure before. Not even your bottled water is this clean."

I took a sip. It tasted like nothing I had ever let pass my lips before. The cool liquid passed my lips and down my throat like cool liquid air. No aftertaste and the smell was vaguely sweet and clean.

"This is really good," I declared. Haldir looked smug. "Don't be so damned happy just yet baby. I've gotta say, not so down with this whole 'chamber pot' thing."

Haldir's face fell, "I know. We have not the technology for the sophisticated sanitation system you have."

"Well remember, I am the person who has said on numerous occasions that if ever I met the chap who invented the flush toilet, I'd give him a bit wet one for making my life easier," I said archly, "Or do we not remember the trauma I suffered from having to dig my own hole on overnighters when I was nine? Or the outhouse experiences I barely tolerated during the annual summer camp tradition? The fact that my brother and I would race to the nearest toilet the minute we got home, just to flush it and cry in utter joy?"

Haldir bit back a snort of laughter, "I remember your trauma well."

"Baby, bowel habits are to be rushed away in a flash flood of water, taking with it the bacteria and accompanying smell. It is what civilised people do," I said in a haughty tone.

That did it. Haldir buckled over in gales of laughter, "My love, while I know you are a delicate creature, I am sure you can adapt to the philistine's lack of comforts."

The 'philistine' did it for me. I should've never introduced Haldir to CNN. He had become far too adept at using other cultural idioms, and it was disconcerting to hear some things fall from his lips. I collapsed onto a chair holding my sides as I laughed. My husband just called me a snob! Delicate creature indeed.

Haldir snorted delicately, and held out his hand for me, "It is time to go to breakfast."

I pulled myself up and took the proffered arm, and off we went to breakfast. I caused quite a stir, as I was a human female married to the third most powerful elf in the city. Haldir was the go-to-guy for the Lord and Lady, and from what I found out from translations supplied by Lady Galadriel, there were a lot of females who were pissed I managed to snag him. He may've been the head of Security, but I equated what I heard about what my husband did for a career with that of a Lord Chancellor or a Lord High Steward. I was amazed that a more formal hierarchy didn't exist. I guess it was up to humans to complicate those sorts of things.

By the time breakfast was finished, I was sure I was a complete and utter failure as a wife, and I told Haldir as such. The look of rage that crossed his face made me regret saying a word about my insecurities. He looked at me, took my hand in his, and began to breathe evenly and slowly. His grip was just a tad too tight, but I figured he was trying to reign in his temper, so I let it go. He stood there, staring at me for a full five minutes, before he let go of my hand and spoke to me.

"Who told you that you were an insufficient wife?"

"No one, but that's the impression I just get. That's all," I kicked the floor under my dress, feeling foolish for even saying a word.

"Who gave you that impression?" The words were forced out of his mouth with a steely calm that I knew could buckle with the wrong answer.

"No one," I sighed, "I just…well it's just that…Jesus Christ on a cracker! I can't explain it. Call it a vibe. Call it bad mojo. Call it whatever you damn well please. I just know that I don't measure up. I'm a common woman, and human at that, and I'm married to the third most powerful guy in this kingdom! God, if we were at home and you were Prince William; I'd be getting lynched right about now."

Haldir's lips formed a tight line, "You are a most satisfactory wife. You give me everything I desire and more. All the elleth in Arda and Aman could not hold a candle to the woman you are! You provide for me on Earth and request nothing from me. You give me anything I need or want without complaint. You have put up with all of my idiosyncrasies and do it with a smile on your lips. You love without conditions. You give whatever you have if there is need. None of the elleth can even come close to the person you are. You fit me. Completely. You have fit me from the first day I saw you on the road. I would not dream of not having you as my wife. You are my other half. You said that there can be no one-sided coin, no top without a bottom, no light without dark. You said that even when things cannot get worse, and you lose hope of finding your way out of the darkness, you know deep within that things will work out for the best. That there is a lesson in everything. That the cycle of life will keep going and you will find yourself again. You have taught me that I can find my way out of the darkness, no matter what, because you are my light, my top, the other side to my coin. You are a permanent fixture in my cycle of life, and I know that no matter what befalls me, you will come back to me," he wiped a tear from his eye, "I am the same to you. I am your dark, your bottom, your other side of the coin. Just as I am not complete without you, you are not complete without me. Forget the petty jealousies of others. You are the only one I can see. They all pale against your light." Haldir pulled me close to him and kissed me with every fibre of his being.

That was the longest speech I had ever heard him make. And it made me cry. I sobbed in his arms as other elves made their way around us on the walkway where we had stopped to talk.

Feeling someone waiting, we broke apart and I looked up. Lady Galadriel was standing there, waiting for us. I gave her a shaky smile and she took my free hand.

"It is time we had a talk. Yes?"


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter Sixteen-Decisions, Decisions

Lady Galadriel led me away from my husband, back to her suspended garden. She led me down a small set of stairs into a secluded alcove, with a stone bath in the middle and a small tumbling waterfall by a stone wall. She walked over to the waterfall and picking up a small jug, filled it with water. She then walked to the bath and poured the water in.

"Come here," she motioned to me, "What do you see when you look into the water?"

I moved over to the bath and looked into the still swirling water. Colours appeared to me, swirling like the water had done, and it suddenly coalesced into a picture. I leaned in closer to see all the details. Haldir was standing alone, tears running down his face as he said goodbye to someone. I couldn't tell who it was because they were turned away from my perspective. Then the scene changed and we were in a city I didn't recognize. The Lady Galadriel's husband Lord Celeborn was there, and he was talking animatedly to Haldir, who was laughing and holding my hand as we sat on a small settee. The scene slowly changed again, and Haldir and I were riding down a very empty road, and Haldir looked very tense, his lips pulled into a tight line. We came upon Lorien, the tall trees looking more worn, with the leaves turned brown instead of the lovely silver hue they were supposed to be. The city was empty, not a soul around, and with this revelation, Haldir looked sadder than I'd ever seen him. At this point, the scene in the water vanished and I looked up to see Lady Galadriel looking down at me, with a small smile playing around her lips.

"What do you think of these images?" she asked kindly.

I didn't know what to think, and I said so.

She took my hand and led me to a low bench near the bath. As we sat down, she turned towards me and began to softly speak, "You were brought here to reunite with your husband, but you are going to be faced with many more decisions than you have been faced with as yet. You may not realize this, but the Eldar are leaving Arda and going home to Aman. The time of the Race of Man is upon us, and our work is done here. Haldir cannot take a human mate with him across the waters, so either he goes and leaves you behind, or he stays and you live here in Arda for the rest of your years. When you pass, he will be left to fade."

I sat dumbfounded. I thought we had already dealt with this back on Earth. "Isn't there another option? Haldir swore he wouldn't leave me and I definitely do not want him to fade."

Lady Galadriel stroked my hand gently, "I know you do not want him to fade. There is one other option, but it is up to Eru himself to grant it."

"Who's Eru?" I asked.

"Eru Ilúvatar is the One. The creator of all. It was he that used the Music of the Ainur to bring into existence all that lives in this world. He created the Valar, thus creating us in the beginning. The Valar can do many things, but not what is needed to keep you and Haldir together for eternity. You are mortal, and he is not. This is a fact that we cannot change, no matter how hard we wish it."

A tear found its way down my cheek as I absorbed her words. Haldir and I could be together, but only if he sacrificed himself to fading upon my death. He would have no second chance at joining his kin across the waters in Aman. I leaned towards Lady Galadriel for a hug. Instead of looking at me like I was some kind of two-headed beastie like some people would, she leaned into me and hugged me in an all-enveloping embrace. I let myself go and cried on her shoulder, as she patted my back gently, murmuring soft words of comfort in my ear. I lay in her arms for a while, letting the tears dry up of their own accord, and she patiently held me.

Sitting up, I wiped my cheek of the last salty remnants of my tears, and Lady Galadriel stroked my hair.

"I think it is about time you called me Galadriel. Seeing as how you've just cried all over my dress," she smiled puckishly.

I coughed up a giggle, and I tried to wipe off the evidence of my emotional breakdown. It was no use. The saline trail I had left on her shoulder needed to be washed out.

She held out a handkerchief, "Blow your nose. You have gotten a bit stuffed up."

I dutifully blew and stuffed the hanky in my bodice, "I'll wash this before I give it back."

"Of course, but you may keep it if you wish," she generously told me.

"May I ask you a question?"

"Of course," she waved for me to continue.

"How do you know English so well?"

"Your husband taught me and my husband as well. He wanted us to be able to communicate with you. He has been teaching his brothers too, but Rúmil has not been taking to it too well. He seems to have difficultly with the way your words are formed. Orophin has fared better, but he has not come as far as Celeborn and I have."

I smiled, "Thank you for taking the time to learn my language. I will try to learn yours as well, but I must warn you, I have a terrible time with French, nevermind Sindarin. I may never master your language."

Galadriel let out a tinkly laugh, "I think you will be fine. You have enough assistance, as both I and my husband have pledged our help."

"Thank you," I said seriously, "Sorry about your dress."

"Do not worry. We will also find a better solution to your problem," she helped me up and we walked out of the garden alcove, "Go to your husband. He is anxious about your well being."

I nodded and thanked Galadriel for her time, and then I wandered off in search of Haldir. I found him back in our talan, waiting for me on a settee. He looked up at me with love and motioned for me to sit down beside him.

Once I was seated, he said, "How was your talk with the Lady?"

"It went fine. She had me look into this pool of water and then we talked about what I saw."

Haldir mulled this over, "What did you see?"

"Nothing good," I replied truthfully, "It seems our life together is destined for a tonne of heartache." I got on my knees in front of him, "I want you to swear that you will sail when the last ship leaves. I'm not kidding. I will live again, you won't. I won't have that. I can live on in new incarnations if I know you are living happily in Aman."

Haldir's eyes narrowed, "You know I will not leave you here. In less than a decade there will be no Eldar in Arda. You will be at the mercy of Man, and I do not trust them with females. They are coarse and rough, and they treat their women like chattel."

I grimaced. I knew how women were treated during the centuries before mine, and even now women were being stripped of their power as men tried to subjugate them using sex. It was still an uphill battle as young women had forgotten what their ancestors had fought for; and instead slid into a subservient position, flashing their breasts at any camera, or getting into sexual situations because they wanted a guy's attention. Feminism had become a dirty word once again, and I wished women could see what existed when they had no status, so that they could understand exactly what they were doing to themselves.

"Haldir, I will survive without you. I am sure they won't keep me here. I may be lonely, but if I know you're alive, I can go on. I need to know we will meet again. I need to know you're all right. Please Haldir, promise me you'll sail," I begged.

Haldir pulled me to his chest, "I cannot promise that my love. I cannot leave you alone. These past few months have torn me apart, not having you with me. I knew I would see you again, but the wait was unbearable. Do not ask me to sail. Allow me time to seek a better solution."

Tears pricked the back of my eyes as I realized there was a huge possibility that Haldir would fade. I just leaned into him, not saying a word, lest they betray me. We sat like that until lunch, and then we joined Orophin and his friends for a light repast amongst the canopy of the huge trees. Orophin tested his English skills, and told me I would learn Sindarin, as I now had a good incentive to. It would allow me more freedom within Lorien and I would be able to travel to other Elven realms with Haldir and be able to fend for myself.

My first days in Lorien were busy, as Haldir showed me around, introducing me to all the people he deemed important for me to know. I got used to the jealous looks that the ellith shot me, and I mostly ignored them. Haldir spoke sharply to a couple of aggressive ellith who had cornered me, and told me he warned them of my station, and how he would see them turned over to the nearest settlement of Men as their penance. I thought that was a tad rough, as I figured they'd be sold into slavery or something horrible. Orophin had been regaling me with sordid tales of what humans were like on this planet. I was glad I had married an elf.

Orophin and Haldir related the history of Arda to me over many nights. When Orophin returned to the borders, and Rúmil came back to the city, it became Rúmil's turn to act out the history as Haldir told me more about how Arda grew up. The days turned into months, and soon it was Fall. I had grown closer to Galadriel and Celeborn during these months, as they had me tell them about what Earth was like. Celeborn was fascinated by my explanations of technological advances, and had employed his engineers into designing a septic system based on the system I had told him about from home. The Eldar were very concerned with hygiene, and Celeborn was very interested in how we had almost eradicated water-borne diseases in developed countries. He was damned lucky I was a Federal Government officer, and had an extensive education, as I was sure someone else might not have this kind of knowledge available to them.

One day a huge procession came into the city. Haldir had left four days before to go to the borders for some reason. He didn't say why, and I didn't ask. Galadriel kept me busy doing things to get ready for some kind of celebration. I was vaguely aware that whatever was happening was big, but my handle on Sindarin wasn't that good, so I wasn't completely sure. I kept catching words like, 'Imladris', 'Lord Elrond', and something about a long goodbye. A part deep inside me knew this had to be about sailing to Aman, but Galadriel had not uttered a word, so I could not be certain. In fact, it was as though every single elf in the city had been instructed not to say a word about Aman, sailing to Aman, or even the 'Great Exodus'. I couldn't get any info, no matter how sneaky I was.

In the procession was a whole swack of elves, but they were all dark, except for one, who had hair as golden as a field of ripe wheat. The one who seemed to be in charge was tall, dark, and he looked really tired. I felt badly for him. Galadriel had me wait with her and Celeborn, while the important members of this travelling gang came to greet them. Galadriel held my hand and smiled broadly at me as they entered the gardens near the huge talan that the Lord and Lady lived in.

I spotted Mithrandir standing behind one of the dark-headed chaps, and he winked at me. I was so surprised I think I may have gasped, and Galadriel gave my hand a quick squeeze as she gently brushed my mind with hers. The one who looked so dammed tired approached Galadriel and Celeborn and bowed. I caught something about greetings from Imladris, and would the Lord and Lady of Lorien please extend hospitality to these weary travellers. I thought that the chap speaking was really weary, and not in a good, gee-whiz got loads of exercise, way. A wisp of laughter brushed my mind, and I knew Galadriel was listening to my musings. She did that quite a bit as she said I was very interesting for a mortal. She said she likes it when I think about silly things and when I fret about being gone from work as long as I have been. Says I'm illogical to worry about something that no longer is an issue.

Galadriel and Celeborn bowed and offered their humble city in welcome, and it seemed the introductions were done. Until Mithrandir came forward and shook my hand.

"Good day Susan. I see you are well. How do you fare in Lorien?" his tone was gentle and friendly.

"I'm good Mithrandir. You know English too?" I was a bit surprised at his easy grasp of what I was told was a difficult language.

Mithrandir laughed, "Yes I know your language. I know many languages. Your world is not unknown to me. I did send a certain someone there on purpose."

I blushed. Mithrandir sent Haldir, but didn't know I was there, otherwise he may've chosen somewhere different. I said slyly, "And aren't you glad you did?"

Mithrandir snorted indelicately, "Hmmmm," he mumbled.

Tired guy came up to us and said in perfect English, "Is this the woman you have told me about Mithrandir?"

I just about keeled over from the shock. Mithrandir gently pushed my mouth closed as he replied to tired guy, "Yes. Lord Elrond, may I present Susan. Susan, this is Lord Elrond, master of Imladris."

I curtseyed as best as I could, seeing as how I was in a state of shock, and said, "My Lord."

Lord Elrond looked amused, "I understand you came from Earth, to join your husband, Marchwarden Haldir."

I nodded, dying to ask him why he was so tired. I didn't because I knew that would be the height of rude.

I felt Galadriel's mind brush mine, and then she joined us in conversation. "Elrond, why don't you tell us what has you so tired?" She kindly spoke in English.

Elrond looked at her askance, "My Lady, you already know why I am tired."

"For the benefit of our guest, who has not been here during those trying times," she nudged.

Elrond gave me a look, "I am tired because of the Great War of the Ring, and all the events that preceded it. I have been in Arda too long, and I look forward to resting within the Blessed Lands."

I didn't know what else to do but pat his hand, "I'm sorry sir. I can't imagine what you've been through. I hope you find peace in Aman, and I just want you to know that you're not alone and you are loved."

This left everyone looking a bit shocked and/or perplexed.

"Why do you say that?" Elrond asked.

"What part?" I asked, a bit confused. I thought I had been perfectly clear.

"The part about not being alone and loved," Elrond arched an eyebrow at me.

"Well, you're not. Alone I mean. No matter what you've been through, no matter how horrible, people have had similar situations and experiences. No one has had the singularly separate experience that absolutely no one else would understand. Everyone has stuff that is kinda like this or that, but close enough that people'd get your experience. Plus, you are loved. Love is an intrinsic part of the fabric of the universe. All you have to do is let it in. So, you're not alone and you are loved," I reasoned.

Galadriel clasped my hand in hers, "Very true indeed."

Mithrandir took a drag on his pipe, "I would still send Haldir to you if I had known you lived there."

Elrond may not have known why Mithrandir said that, but I got it. Mithrandir knew I understood stuff, and while I may not be the most desirable person on the face of it, I had what it took to be with Haldir. It took my honesty to give him the answers he needed.

Haldir joined me as Elrond and his posse moved off to claim their telain and assorted baggage. He stroked my hair and kissed my neck.

"Did you meet Lord Elrond?"

"Yup. He's pretty tired. I hope he gets some sleep," I said.

Haldir laughed, "Yes he is tired. He does not have a woman like you to keep him active and well rested."

"You don't rest well," I accused, "Neither do I. I have gotten less sleep here, than I did back on Earth."

"And is that a bad thing?" he purred in my ear.

"No," I said curtly, "But I need a facial so I don't look as haggard as I feel."

I felt a pair of hands circle my waist, "I will give you a massage if you join me in our talan for a few hours before the welcoming feast."

I calculated the time and when I would be needed to help Galadriel out, "I have three hours free. Let's make use of them."

We practically ran back to our place.


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter Seventeen-Farewell Tour 3021

(dialogue in _italics_ are meant to be speech in Sindarin)

The next few weeks were a flurry of activity. Galadriel, Celeborn and Elrond spent loads of time together, reminiscing I suppose. Haldir had explained that they had known each other for centuries, and as Elrond and Galadriel would be sailing in a while, they wanted to spend some quality time beneath the mallorn trees they loved.

I asked why Celeborn wasn't going with them, and Haldir said that he would go to Imladris when the trees began to turn. A few elves would stay behind until Celeborn decided to finally sail. I knew Haldir would stay. He'd try to stay past Celeborn's sailing, and I couldn't allow that. I couldn't live with myself if Haldir faded. We never fought about it, and hardly ever talked about the last sailing. It was like walking on eggshells. Both of us were afraid of what the other would say, and neither of us wanted to deal with the inevitable. Our love bound us tightly together, but at times I wondered if was an albatross, just waiting to watch us sink beneath the waves.

The time for what I was calling the 'Farewell Tour 3021' was upon us. I jokingly told Galadriel that they should get tour buses and loads of roadies to go out in style. No point in doing a farewell tour if you didn't do it like a rock star. Celeborn had some of the artisans make up banners with 'Farewell Tour 3021' written in Tengwar, as a joke. I still had a hard time reading Tengwar, but Haldir told me what they said. Galadriel told the Celeborn that the banners would be used, just to wipe the grin off his face. I know Celeborn thought it was funny, but acquiesced to his wife's fit of pique, and played along with being chastised.

Elrond didn't really speak to me, but threw me the occasional odd look. I mostly ignored them, asking Mithrandir only once about it. He just looked mysterious, and changed the topic. Annoying man.

We left the trees of Lorien at the end of November. The air had turned much cooler, and Haldir had gotten some travelling clothes made up for me to fight off the weather, remembering that I was subject to temperature more than he was. Haldir had given me a lovely elven jewelled necklace for my birthday back in October, and I wore it under my warm dress and cloak. I had been taking riding lessons since I had arrived, but I still ached something terrible everytime I got off the poor animal after a few hours of lessons. As we rode out under the mallorn trees, I held a bit of trepidation in my heart, wondering if I could make the trip they had planned. We were going around all of Arda, saying goodbye.

It took a few weeks to get to Minas Tirith, and Haldir was quite nervous about the whole deal. I was told I couldn't interact with the mortals, and Haldir had quite a few of his friends assigned on a type of security detail. I was to never be alone. I only knew what Haldir and his brother had told me about the race of Men, but I thought perhaps they had overstated their concerns. That was until we entered the city. It was a dull grey colour, and you could tell that rebuilding was going on. Some much for the vaunted 'White City'. Our entourage was led up several levels to the top, where we were greeted by what I could only assume was Gondor's Lord Chamberlain. He led us into the citadel, and took us into the throne room. Haldir had me stand in the middle of all the ellith and I watched intently as Elrond greeted the King and his Queen like they were family. Orophin quietly told me that Elrond was the father of the Queen and the foster father of the King. I thought that sounded kinda incestuous, but I didn't have the whole story, so I decided I'd ask Haldir once we got settled.

Once the meet and greet was over, we were led off to our rooms. Haldir and I were placed close to Galadriel and Celeborn, just two doors down. As we entered our room, I noticed a huge fireplace dividing the sitting room from the bedroom. It was open on both sides to allow for the most efficient delivery of heat. The room smelled faintly of mothballs, and when I opened the wardrobe, I found out why. A few mothballs rolled out onto the floor and I sidestepped them, as I turned back to Haldir.

"It's at times like these, I really miss Vancouver," I announced.

Haldir laughed and walked over to me, "It is not that bad."

"Uh, yes it is. Mothballs Haldir. Mothballs! Plus, the ever present smell of mould in the air. It's like I'm stuck in some decrepit building near Chinatown in the East End."

"Then you should feel right at home," Haldir joked.

I swatted him. "Bloody hell Haldir. I miss elevators, take out and being able to order crap online," I retorted.

He wrapped me in his arms, "I am sorry this has been hard on you."

I sighed, "It hasn't been hard really. Lorien is great, it just the rest of Arda that I'm not too thrilled about. Did you get a load of the looks those people shot me on the way in? Not exactly welcoming. I guess it comes down to Earth being so far ahead of these people. Your world is stuck in the Middle Ages, with no hope of technological advancement. An Agrarian society just isn't how I pictured living out the rest of my life. Sorry Haldir, I don't mean to rant like this, but the last few weeks have been a wee bit trying." I ran my fingers through my hair and plopped my head against his chest.

Haldir hugged me tighter, "You are not ranting. I understand this isn't what you like. I knew you were not well suited to life here. Perhaps we can find a way back. I liked life with you in Vancouver. I love your family and I have made some friends as well. You have been a good influence on me, and I would be happy to spend the rest of my days on Earth with you."

I immediately thought of him fading after I died, and a sad look flitted over my face. I tamped it down before I let it go any further. Haldir and I had been doing so well and I didn't want to jinx anything.

"What are you thinking about?" he asked softly.

"Nothing. Home. Earth," I replied, burying my face in his chest.

A knock at the door interrupted our reverie, and two servant girls came in, carrying a large metal tub. The older girl spoke up, "_We are bringing you your bath, so you may freshen up from your long travels._" She spoke in Sindarin, albeit in a terrible accent.

One thing I learned up front was the proper accent, as Haldir told me Sindarin not spoken correctly was akin to nails down a chalkboard. He got the chalkboard demo when a drunken guy fell down an outdoor menu sign on Davie one night. The guy was so hammered, he scratched the chalkboard all the way down and people were freaking out around him. Haldir was not impressed.

The bath was filled, as other servant girls came in and poured the water in the tub. All of them shot me curious looks and some of them looked a bit piqued. I had the feeling they did not approve of a human woman with one of the Eldar. Once they had gone, Haldir bolted the door and helped me get undressed as he undressed himself.

"The tub is not very big, but I believe if you lie against me, we shall both fit," he led me to the steaming tub.

"I think I may have a hard time here, baby," I commented as he helped me into the tub.

"Why?" he got in with me and we slid into the hot water.

"Those girls do not approve of me," I took the wash cloth and began working on Haldir's legs.

"They do not matter," he informed me as he rubbed my neck.

"They are a barometer to how other people think. Regular people have an influence on how the general populace works, and if servants don't like you, you can bet your bottom dollar that their muckity-mucks won't either."

Haldir took the cloth from me and began to wash my front, "We will protect you from that Susan."

"For how long? You cannot be with me every moment of the day. No one can. So, that leaves me open to god only knows what. You're the one who distrusts the race of Men. What is your exit plan if things get dicey?"

Haldir grunted as he moved from my front to my back, "Do not worry. I will think of something."

I knew Haldir would take care of me, but I felt like it shouldn't come to that. Education was the key to changing behaviour, but I didn't know if I would be overstepping my bounds if I suggested it.

We finished our bath and Haldir looked through my trunk, choosing the gown I was to wear to the welcoming feast. I've got to admit, my husband has excellent taste. Even back on Earth, he always chose items that made me look my best. I used to kid with him, saying he should have his own show called 'Elvish Eye for the Straight Guy'. He archly told me he could only choose my clothes, as he was my mate.

Dinner was being served at sevenish. My watch from Earth still worked, as I had one of those kinetic wristwatches. All you have to do is swing your wrist about to keep it working. It took a bit to figure out what time it was, as there was no regional time keeping standard, but I watched the sun and managed to figure it out. Haldir finds my need to know the time amusing, but I told him that when he was on Earth, he was time-conscious too.

The banquet hall was huge. I didn't realize this citadel was that large. Galadriel, Celeborn and Elrond entered first, and then Haldir, myself and another elf called Glorfindel followed behind them. I had only spoken to him once while we travelled, when I needed help with my saddle. He was a quiet type, very introspective. I hoped to talk to him further, as Haldir had told me about his life in Aman, subsequent death, and rebirth into Arda. I was fascinated and wanted to know if was akin to our reincarnation on Earth. As we passed under boughs of green leaves, I watched the guests at the lower tables stand and stare at us. I had no idea why, as they had an elven queen. I would've thought they would be used to an elven delegation by now. Apparently not. They stared holes through us. Haldir had me between him and Glorfindel, so the guests already at the tables couldn't really see me. Haldir's brothers took up the rear, to block me from the stares from behind. I felt like I was on display even with the protective measures, but I sucked it up, raised my head high and acted aloof.

Luckily, the seating had Glorfindel beside Elrond, who was to the right of the King. I sat beside him and Haldir was beside me. Celeborn sat to the left of the Queen, with Galadriel beside him and Orophin beside her. Elrond was the only one who ruined the boy-girl-boy-girl seating arrangement. As I watched everyone bow to the King and Queen as they entered, I heard a low laugh beside me.

Glorfindel whispered under his breath, "_Lord Elrond does ruin the image you seek_."

I looked at him askance. How _did_ he know that? I hadn't said a word aloud. The fact that he may have a bit of telepathic ability made me nervous. I hoped he hadn't heard my thoughts about his derriere when he got on his horse. I couldn't help it. It was cute. Hey, I did not cheat on my husband, but I saw no harm in admiring beauty.

Another laugh, "_Thank you_."

Oooh, now that ability could be dangerous. And really annoying.

Glorfindel gave me a serious look and whispered, "_You have no idea_."

Haldir looked over at Glorfindel and smiled, "_Charming my wife, my friend_?"

"_It is she who charms me_," he answered, grinning back at my husband.

"_She does that often_," Haldir replied before he turned his attention to his wine goblet.

I bit my lip, biting back a laugh. I charmed people. As if. The truth was the elves put up with me, my terrible Sindarin and my lack of strength. Countless times I had to ask for help with things these people found easy, and I was sure they were good and tired of me by now.

Dinner progressed at a slow rate, but it gave me time to grill Glorfindel on his life. Haldir chatted amiably with one of the Queen's ladies-in-waiting, letting me have my verbal way with Glorfindel. He knew I'd die of curiosity if I didn't learn about Glorfindel's life. Turns out, Glorfindel can be quite loquacious after liberal amounts of good wine. I learned all about his lives and how he spends his current life celibate to be able to clearly reflect on Eru's purpose in Arda and Aman. I told him about the monastic lifestyle on Earth and gave him a rundown of some of the world's major religions. He was fascinated with Daoism, which I understood. What's not to entice you about the unknowable? It's like some delicious mystery, waiting for you to unwrap it. Completely unknowable my ass. Lao Tzu was a riddler, but he had some strong points in logic.

After the food and drink we repaired to what could only be called the ballroom. A musical group was in one corner and as they struck up a tune, the King and Queen took to the dance floor. The evening was long, and just after 2am, by my watch, the King and Queen took their leave. Haldir and I snuck out just after them, while Glorfindel came along to see us to our room. He was in the room beside ours, and I apologized in advance. He gave me a knowing look and I got a bit embarrassed. Since Haldir took to making love with me so I would cry out loudly, I had gotten out of the habit of being silent. I hoped Glorfindel understood, and he just smiled and told me to have a lovely evening. We retired to our room, but as I was exhausted from the travel, Haldir told me he would wake me before midday meal to make love. We fell asleep in each others arms to the sounds of the party spilling out onto the parapet below us.


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter Eighteen-Denial Is A River In Egypt

(Dialogue in _italics_, is spoken Sindarin)

I was dreaming I was walking down Davie Street with Haldir and a little boy holding my hand. The little boy was about three or four and had a mop of unruly blond hair and blue-green eyes. I knew he was ours. The sun shone brightly down on us as we stopped at an ice-cream place to get a cone. The little boy got some on his shirt, but Haldir helped him clean it up as he led us to a bench across the street to sit down on. We watched traffic ebb and flow, and our son finished his cone, and crawled up on Haldir, playing with his long hair. Haldir leaned over and began kissing my ear, then moved to my jaw, nibbling gently on my skin. Our son laughed as he tugged on Haldir's neck.

His kisses became more intense, as my body lit on fire from his caress. I moaned as his lips found my mouth and his tongue parted my lips, delicately seeking out the nooks and crannies of my mouth. The scene began to fade away and I found myself waking to the deep kisses of my husband.

Looking down into my eyes, Haldir smiled, "Good morning my love."

"Morning," I said groggily, "Keep doing what you were doing. It was a nice way to wake up."

Haldir leaned back in and started to kiss me again. His hair fell around him, creating a cocoon, hiding our faces from view as he kissed me. I felt his hands slide over my skin and under my nightdress. My body was already on fire from his previous kisses, and I arched into his hand as he cupped my breast and stroked my nipples. Haldir pulled away from my mouth for a moment as he pulled my nightdress over my body, and tossed it on the end of the bed. I yanked his bottoms off his hips and Haldir pulled them off the rest of the way. As he came back up from under the covers, I felt him stop over my crotch, his breath caressing my mons and making me squirm. A finger stroked my nether lips and, parting them, dipped inside me. A second soon followed, and the stroking found the hot spot as I wriggled in pleasure. My breath became pants as his tongue laved me, and I shoved my arm across my mouth as the sensations threatened to overwhelm me. I tossed my head back and forth in the burgeoning ecstasy that build with every lick and stroke. Haldir pressed his free arm across my belly to stop my writhing, but the pressure built and I arched as the feelings grew more intense. Falling over the edge, I cried out as the climax crashed over me. I shook against Haldir's body, as the tremors subsided.

Haldir took that opportunity to plunge inside of me, and I contracted against the intrusion. His initial thrust was fast, but the rhythm he continued was slower and more deliberate. My body adjusted to his rhythm, and soon we were both panting with the building climax. Haldir sped up his thrusts and I met him with a parry of my hips to every thrust of his. I watched him, intently focus on me, and lost myself in his eyes. He kissed my face as he sped up even more. My body collapsed with the onslaught of the climax, Haldir soon followed with a bellow, his thrusts erratic and frenzied. Pulling out, he fell to the side of me, and we let our bodies shudder to a stop. We dozed for a short while as we let our bodies cool down from the exertion.

After our lovemaking, and subsequent rest, we got ourselves together and dressed after washing ourselves as best as we could in the wash basin. We had slept through breakfast, but were a bit early for midday meal, so we decided to wander through the Royal Garden to kill time. As we entered the gardens, I spotted Glorfindel over in a corner near the parapet. Haldir smiled and told me to go over and talk to him, as his brother had just wandered in and he wanted to speak to him about an event later that day.

As I sat down, Glorfindel smiled at me, "_You were very quiet last night_."

I laughed, "_You were not in your room this morning_."

Glorfindel raised his brow and laughed, "_I am happy you are not shy about lovemaking. There is nothing to be ashamed of in expressing your love_."

I blushed, "_Haldir trained me out of that. I wanted to ask you something though. It is why I sat down_."

"_Yes_?"

"_Are you sailing with Lord Elrond_?" I asked.

"_I am_," he told me, curiosity in his eyes.

I looked around the walled garden as I gathered my thoughts. Small trees were lined in rows in large stone boxes, with grass and winter flowers wrapped around the bases. Along the parapet, a long single stone box was lined with more flowers, their subdued colours almost opaque against the cold grey skies. I pulled my wrap around me tighter and looked back at Glorfindel.

"_I am concerned my husband will not sail_," I admitted, "_I do not want him to fade_."

Glorfindel took my hand and held it in his own, "_He is bound to you. If he left he may not survive in Aman_."

I sucked in a breath. Not survive in Aman? How could that be?

"_Aman does not guarantee survival of a bonded mate who will never see their partner again. Sorrow has taken many of us from the welcome arms of the living_," he ruefully replied to my unspoken words.

"_How do I save him_?" I anxiously asked, as I watched Haldir laugh across the garden at something his brother said.

Glorfindel looked sad, "_You cannot_."

"_That is not an acceptable answer_," I told him sternly. I could not lose hope. Haldir had to survive. I needed him to survive. I would sacrifice myself to save him.

"_Do not even think that. There is no need to tempt fate_," he warned me, "_Does the Lady Galadriel know about your need_?"

"_Yes. As does Mithrandir and I believe Lord Elrond as well_," I affirmed.

Glorfindel's head tipped to the side as he mulled this news over, "_If they are all involved, I am sure something can be worked out. You will not lose your love_."

I sighed and hoped it would be true. Glorfindel shook my hand, "_Now I have a question to ask you. Will you explain the tenants of Buddhism to me again? I see such a clear logic, and it makes me curious_."

We spent the rest of the morning before the midday meal call, discussing the main principles of Buddhism, and the difference between the layman's practice of Buddhism and the philosophical theology. He found the intricate cosmology built around Buddhism interesting, but found it too complex to mesh well with the theology. I explained the genetic tendency to believe in a being higher than ourselves and explained it was built into our DNA, which really piqued his interest. I couldn't tell him about more than the rudiments of DNA, as I was a Humanities major in college, not Science.

Once the announcement for lunch was made, we parted to go into the dining hall. It was good to get back into a warmer building after the cold air outside. I should've brought more than my wrap, but I was a bit distracted when Haldir and I left our room. The meal served at lunch was hearty fare, a thick beef stew, breads and cheeses, along with wine and fruit juice. I think they added that because I don't drink, but then I wasn't sure. I noticed a few elves partake of the juice, so I didn't know if it was their idea for their own palates. Glorfindel was seated with some of the elves from Imladris, but every now and again, would shoot me a concerned look. I guess I looked like a bit of a sour puss, because Haldir finally asked me about it.

"My love, you have been looking quite pensive. What is the problem?"

I didn't want to lie to Haldir, but I also didn't want to start an argument either, so I opted for the middle ground. Denial. "Nothing. Just pensive," I avoided.

Haldir laughed, "My love, I know you too well, what has you like this?"

"Baby, I really don't think you want to get into this right now," I warned. The dining hall had cleared out some, but there were still many people milling around.

Haldir looked askance at me, and with knowledge dawning on his face, he helped me up and hurried me back to our quarters. Once the door was closed and bolted, he turned to me with an angry look on his face.

"You want me to sail," he said bluntly.

"Well, yeah," I said as his face got darker, "But now I'm not so sure. Glorfindel was telling me that you could fade in Aman too."

Haldir let the anger drain from his face, "Yes, I can. That is why I need to remain by your side."

"But I don't want you to fade period!" I exclaimed, getting frustrated at being between a rock and a hard place.

"Darling, I know you do not, but you have no choice. I am bonded to you. I will fade upon your death. It is just the way things are," he soothed.

"Not good enough Haldir. Entirely unacceptable. I want a solution to this. I cannot abide this situation any further!" I almost stamped my foot in irritation.

Haldir pulled me to him, "I know. I know. Perhaps the Valar will give us a solution to our dilemma."

"I hope so," I mumbled into his chest. This was not a happy situation at all.

I was still tired from the late night, and we went to bed to nap and make love until dinner. Haldir was hoping I would become pregnant soon, even though I was afraid to become pregnant, in case I did not see the child reach their majority. There were so many worries I had about this life I had chosen, and I wasn't sure what to do about any of them.

The weeks passed and soon it was time to leave and visit Rohan. Winter Solstice was celebrated in Minas Tirith, which was fun, but also filled with sadness. We had to move on at the end of January as King Eomer was expecting us. The plan was to hit Rohan and Edoras, and then move on to Eryn Lasgalen to bid goodbye to King Thranduil. Haldir had told me that Thranduil would most likely sail when Celeborn sailed, as he had become quite attached to Arda, and there were even rumours that he wouldn't sail at all.

I wasn't looking forward to the ride, as my bottom had gotten used to not being pounded by a hard saddle for hours a day. I envied my husband, who could ride for days without a saddle, and still jump off the horse and not be fatigued. I wished I was an elf, and then all my problems would be solved. I could move to Aman with Haldir, we could have children and everything would be fine. But that was a pipe dream. The Valar wouldn't see fit to grant me elfhood. I wasn't one of the first peoples of this planet. I was part Cree on Earth, but that didn't count here. No one cared that I was First Nations, least of all the Valar.

Our goodbyes were fraught with emotion for Elrond and Galadriel. I knew it was breaking their hearts to say goodbye to Queen Arwen and King Elessar. Elrond just seemed to disappear inside himself as the sadness engulfed him. Galadriel was a bit more pragmatic, but not by much. I could sense their sadness, and it made me even more aware of the situation between Haldir and myself.

We rode to Rohan just after the end of January, off into the cold wintry weather. The King and Queen had gifted me with blankets and coats of fur to keep me warm, as Haldir had made their staff aware of my mortal needs. I was full of trepidation about Rohan and its inhabitants.

Little did I know how much of an adventure Rohan would be.


	19. Chapter 19

Chapter Nineteen-I Love the Smell of Rohan In the Morning

(_Italics_ denotes Sindarin speech)

Our arrival in Edoras was full of fan fare. I had no idea for sure, but it seemed as though the entire population of the city had turned out to greet us. It was a rather primitive city, if I was to compare it to Minas Tirith, which was pretty primitive by my own personal standards. Anyways, it seemed as though every man, woman and child had turned up in the rough cobblestone streets and were waving us on. We had left our horses in the stables near the gates, and had walked through the city up the hill to the house of the king. Glorfindel had whispered to me that it was called Meduseld. The King of Rohan was standing out on the terrace with his court, waiting to greet us.

Elrond, Galadriel and Celeborn went through the greetings with aplomb, even though I knew they were a bit weary from the travel. They always were elegant and understated. They reminded me of my Dad. He was always well turned out, cool as a cucumber and completely unflappable. Elrond was almost exactly like him, except for the ever-present sadness. I kept thinking a good dose of cognitive-behavioural therapy would do him a world of good. Once the wordy greetings were over, we broke up to go to our quarters and freshen up before the proverbial feast that evening. As Haldir and I passed the King, he eyed me and gave me a funny look. I made sure he wasn't giving anyone else that look, but it didn't look like he was watching anybody else other than me. I took Haldir's arm more tightly and we walked down the hall to our room.

That evening at the feast, Haldir noticed the looks I was getting from the King and went to Glorfindel to have him sit with me for a moment. I knew that look Haldir got when he had a bee in his bonnet, and he had it now. I turned to Glorfindel with a worried look in my eyes.

"_He is not going to tell the King off, is he_?" I asked.

Glorfindel laughed, "_No. He is merely going to inquire about what interest the King has with you_."

"_Well, he should not have any interest. I am married_," I huffed.

"_The race of Man do not approve of Eldar and Mortal relationships. King Elessar and Queen Arwen are an exception, as the King is of Númenor descent and the Heir of Isildur. Their destiny was fated before they were even born. I believe King Eomer feels you should be mated with a mortal, as he does not understand the lengths the Valar and others have gone to see you mated to Haldir_," Glorfindel explained.

"_That still does not ease my heart regarding Haldir's discussion with King Eomer_," I said, grasping my dress firmly in my hands.

Glorfindel placed a hand over one of mine, "_Haldir has dealt with matters requiring diplomatic delicacy before. Do not doubt him_."

"_I do not doubt him. I doubt the emotional stability of the people he speaks to_," I retorted.

I watched as Haldir leaned into King Eomer's ear to speak. The exchange took only a moment, but the look the King had was incredulous and not a bit upset. He said something to Haldir and then looked over at me. Haldir left the King's side and came back to me.

"He wants to speak to you," he informed me, "Without me present."

"But I don't speak Westron. Who will translate?" I asked. I couldn't believe how this was turning out. I was getting a command from the King for god only knew what.

Haldir looked over at Glorfindel, who elegantly shrugged.

"_I will help Susan with the King_," he offered.

The King got up from his seat and swept out of the banqueting hall. That was our cue, and Glorfindel and I followed him.

Glorfindel leaned into me, "_You must hold my hand the entire time the King speaks, or you will not hear what he is saying_."

"_I can hear people just fine Glorfindel. I need the translation for what he says_," I replied.

"_You will not need a translation if you hold on to me. A little trick I learned in Aman. Trust me_," he smiled down at me.

I slid my hand into his and felt a light brush across my mind. Then inside my head I heard Glorfindel speak, "Lady Galadriel is not the only one who can cross boundaries such as this."

I gasped quietly and just about let go of his hand, but Glorfindel clasped my hand harder, "Do not let go. You will hear what I hear, just do not let go."

We entered a small room where the King stood near a desk. He had an angry look on his face. "We do not need the elf my lady," he said tersely.

Glorfindel answered for me, "She needs a translator as she only speaks Sindarin your Majesty."

"Oh," the look softened somewhat, "I want to ask the lady if she married the elf of her own free will."

Glorfindel leaned into me, "_Did you_?" His tone was joking but his look serious.

"_Do not be ludicrous. Of course, I love him_," I retorted.

"The lady loves the elf and married him in a fëa bond," Glorfindel explained.

The King looked perplexed, "But he is immortal. You would be better suited to a mortal mate who could provide for you properly."

That irked me, "_Haldir does support me properly. Tell him while we have the mortal/immortal issue, that is it. The marriage is healthy and I am very happy_."

Glorfindel transmitted the message as he bit back the grin.

"My lady, please do not think I am prying, but you need a man to properly care for you," he told me sincerely.

I knew he only had my best interests at heart, but how he could think I was not properly cared for was beyond me. "_I am tired of this Glorfindel. Please tell him in no uncertain terms how I feel_."

Glorfindel smiled and patted my arm, "_Of course_." He turned to Eomer, "Sire, please allow me to tell you that Lady Susan is very happy and properly cared for by her husband. The Eldar love Susan and we all look after her well-being. Please understand sire, that Lady Susan has been preordained to this mating. It was in the hands of the Valar that the circumstances for their meeting and falling in love took place."

King Eomer looked taken aback, "I apologize my lord. Please convey my sincerest apologies to Lady Susan for the difficulties I have subjected her to."

"It will be done sire," Glorfindel said truthfully, as he turned to me and said, "_Is that well enough_?"

"_It is fine_," I said and smiled at the King.

Glorfindel let King Eomer know that I was satisfied and we left to rejoin my husband in the Great Hall. Soon after I proclaimed I was tired, and Haldir made his apologies as we retired to our bedchamber. I was so wrung out from my ordeal and the travel, Haldir let me fall asleep in his arms without making love first.

Our days in Rohan were peaceful from that point on, even though the elven contingent received loads of looks from a population unused to so many of this race amongst their own. King Eomer spent a lot of time in conference with Galadriel, Celeborn and Elrond. Mithrandir joined them on occasion and always left looking exhausted. I finally managed to corner him on day on the terrace, where he was getting a breath of fresh air after one of the marathon meetings.

"Mithrandir, we must talk," I approached him carefully.

Mithrandir just grimaced and grumbled, "Can an old man not get but a moment's peace?"

"Give me a break. You're not old and you're not a man. Haldir told me all about you. You're an Istari, a wizard. You live for bloody ever and you are an underling of the Valar, so quit your griping," I admonished him.

He grimaced, "Well I suppose I cannot avoid you forever. You are a force to be reckoned with when you get something into your head."

"Speaking of…is there a solution to our issues yet? Haldir and I? I will not suffer another day unless I know there is actual action being taken and it hasn't sunk into the mire of bureaucracy. And I KNOW bureaucracy. Being former Federal Government and all," I sniffed.

Mithrandir looked amused at my tirade, "The Valar have not seen fit to tell me what stage they have come to regarding your issue. They will advise me when they wish to. But know this; you were brought over as you are important to the outcome of Haldir's life. He has served the Valar well and faithfully, and you are his reward. Your issue is being taken seriously, but the Valar act in their own time."

It was my turn to grimace, "Spirit time. I know what that is too. It generally means they're taking their own sweet time and god only knows if I'll even be alive when they make a decision."

Mithrandir just smothered a grin with his hand, "I am sure they will decide before you pass from this plane." With that he threw me a funny look and swished off with his robes twirling around his feet.

Elrond, Celeborn and Galadriel got out of the meeting with Eomer just after I came in from outside. Celeborn glided up to me with a look of mild desperation on his face.

"Save me from any more meetings _mellon-nîn_. I simply cannot take another boring meeting about improved relations between our peoples," he implored.

"Isn't that your business my lord? Governing and negotiating with your allies?"

Celeborn laughed, "That may be so, but it does not mean I enjoy the endless meetings any more than you would."

"I'm a professional public servant. Endless meetings and bureaucracy are my life," I joked, "If I could speak Westron, I would happily sit in on your meetings and help expedite them more efficiently."

Celeborn laughed, "If only…you have taken to Sindarin fairly well. Perhaps we could teach you Westron."

Galadriel came up behind him and laughed, "She only knows enough Sindarin to get along, not enough to negotiate difficult treatises. She could not learn Westron quickly enough to help you. Put it out of your mind, _meleth nîn_."

Celeborn sighed and patted Galadriel's hand, "It was but a hope…but a hope."

Haldir came up behind me and wrapped his arms around me in a protective embrace, "My love, we have a few hours before it will be time for supper. Shall we engage in some more productive activity?" That was Haldir's code for him being a horn dog.

I grinned, "Uh-huh. I'm sure you have a plethora of ideas for us."

Celeborn grinned, "Shall we follow their lead, _meleth nîn_?" A look of hope glinted in his eyes.

Galadriel just smiled and took his hand, leading him away from us. Haldir took that as a cue to chase me back to our bedchambers and do what he had wanted to do with me quite a bit. I had not yet become pregnant, but he always hoped it would happen with every session of lovemaking we engaged in.

A month after arriving in Edoras, we left to head for a last visit with King Thranduil and see the forests of Eryn Lasgalen. Galadriel was insistent that we meet with Thranduil as she said she personally doubted he would sail, and she did not wish for him to fade in his beloved forest. King Eomer was only too happy to see us off, as it would mean an end to their endless meetings. I still had no idea what their meetings were about as no one saw fit to tell me, but in the meantime I had picked up a few skills in riding a horse. A few of the Rohirrim took it upon themselves to train me out of my awful riding habits. I now was able to ride with a bit more grace and control the animal better. Plus, my backside hurt less as they taught me a few tricks to make sure I was posting properly. It's harder than it looks, believe you me.

Our ride to Eryn Lasgalen and to Thranduil's cave-palace took several weeks. Spring was in the air, and I was sneezing up a storm with all the extra pollen floating around. Haldir and Galadriel's healer had given me several treatments before we happened upon an effective cure. Once we nailed that down, the trip was much easier on me. Hayfever is never convenient, especially when you have to use hankies instead of easily disposed of tissues. Every Spring I went through hell for about five weeks until the pollen count went down, and it took being in Arda to realize how cushy I had it at home. Here, the healer had to create ointments for my peeling nose, tinctures for the symptoms and teas to help with the causes. My immune system was on a tear, and I kept the healer quite busy.

By the time we reached the elven community near the palace, my allergies had thankfully taken their leave of me. It would not do to sneeze all over a monarch. A diplomatic no-no, to be sure. King Thranduil met us at the palace's huge doors. His charisma was pretty evident, even from the bottom of the steps. Haldir was tall, standing at 6'4", but this guy outstripped him by a couple of inches. He had hair the colour of sunlight and green eyes that I noticed were darker than my own. I have pretty dark green eyes, and most people notice them before they notice the rest of me. But Thranduil's eyes were the colour of a Scots Pine. No flecks of gold or silver, like my eyes had, but a straight deep green, worthy of a Crayola box. I couldn't help but look into his eyes after we had bowed and curtseyed and Elrond was busy with his greeting speech. Thranduil was pretty magnetic as he found me staring at him and stared back with a haughty gaze. I felt like he was stripping me bare and seeing the inside of my soul with that gaze. Unnerving to say the least.

I was relieved once Haldir and I were safely ensconced in our rooms for a bit before the traditional welcoming feast. Out of sheer nerves, I made Haldir make love to me, just so I'd know he was real and I wasn't hallucinating this. Thranduil had affected me so. Not that Haldir was complaining. He always welcomed the opportunity to make love to his wife, and I think he understood my apprehension, as he made love to me tenderly and thoroughly. By the time we got to the feast, I was much more relaxed and at ease.

Thank goodness, as King Thranduil was to prove trying, as our visit went on.

_mellon-nîn_- my friend

_meleth nîn_- my love


	20. Chapter 20

Chapter Twenty-An Ace Beats A King

(Dialogue in _italics_ is spoken Sindarin)

The welcome dinner was subdued compared to the standards set by the feasts thrown by the mortals. Thranduil had not bothered to pull out one of the stops to put on this tepid fete. No garlands of fresh flora, no copious amounts of wine flowing, and the food portions were worthy of a fine french restaurant, being so tiny you needed to hit a McDonalds after dinner. Thranduil was barely civil to Elrond, and just a tiny bit warmer with Galadriel. Celeborn was seated beside the King, and he seemed to hold the most favour, as Thranduil spoke only to him, but even then the King hardly spoke. Haldir and I were seated among Thranduil's subjects. Even Mithrandir did not receive preferential treatment. He was seated beside me on the floor, while Thranduil suffered only Elrond, Galadriel and Celeborn on the dais.

Glorfindel was seated at a table behind ours, and throughout the meal he'd lean back and crack jokes with Mithrandir, Haldir and I. It made the meal bearable as the elves we were seated with only spoke with us if we spoke first. A tangible arctic chill had swept the palace, and I hoped Galadriel would cut our visit short, as I don't care to stay where I'm not wanted.

Glorfindel leaned back during dessert and touched my back with his hand. "I am sure the Lady Galadriel will not suffer Thranduil's foolishness more than absolutely necessary my lady. She is much too wise to endure his fit of pique without putting a stop to it," he told me as his mind brushed mine.

I reached behind me and grabbed his retreating hand, "I hope it is soon. The King is doing his best to see to our discomfiture."

I heard Glorfindel laugh as he let go of my hand, returning to the paltry dessert. Haldir leaned over to me and kissed my cheek.

"I am sorry you are not having a good time. I do not understand why the King is acting this way. Normally he loves to show of his wealth and power. Something must be wrong," he whispered in my ear.

"What could it be?" I asked, keeping my voice low, so it would be hard to hear over the voices of the other elves from our delegation who were freely speaking at their tables.

"I do not know, but I am sure the Lady will find out. Nothing happens without her knowledge," he clasped my hand in his, "We will retire after this so you can rest. I have a feeling our visit will not be as long as the Lady had hoped for."

The meal was finally over, and much to our shock, Thranduil had no plans for dancing. The elves of Eryn Lasgalen left the hall without so much as a 'by-your-leave' the moment Thranduil had left the hall to return to his chambers. Galadriel was quite surprised by this turn, judging by the look on her face. She stood and nodded to us as she and Celeborn left. After that, the rest of us left the hall, with many of our contingent speaking softly to each other as we exited.

Not long after we left the hall and had returned to our room, there was a knock at our door. Haldir answered it, and Galadriel and Celeborn glided in with serious looks on their faces.

"Susan, I am afraid we are the bearers of ill news," Celeborn said, as he reached for my hand.

As I gave him my hand I asked, "What are you talking about? What bad news?"

Galadriel stood next to me, and put her arm around my shoulders, "King Thranduil is quite upset that we brought a mortal into his realm without first advising him. He has asked Celeborn to have you removed."

"What? Why on earth would he do that?" I was perplexed and upset by this demand.

"Susan," Celeborn hugged my hand, "Thranduil has not trusted the Race of Men for many millennia. He trades with the people of Esgaroth, but he keeps contact with them to a minimum. He advised me that he cannot trust someone he has not previously vetted, and wants you to leave tonight."

Haldir immediately spoke up, anger lacing his words, "My wife is going nowhere tonight. It is too dangerous to travel at this hour. We will leave in the morning."

"Haldir," Galadriel looked upset as she spoke, "Susan is to leave alone. Thranduil has specifically said that Susan may not have any elven guide."

Haldir sputtered with fury, "NO! I will not tolerate my wife travelling alone in a land she does not know. I will not tolerate this, my Lady. If I have to confront the King myself, I will. Susan goes nowhere without me!"

Celeborn smiled, "You do not have to _mellon-nîn_. Galadriel and I are in agreement. Thranduil has insulted us grievously and we will not tolerate such egregious behaviour. We will tell Thranduil that we are leaving tonight. All of us."

Galadriel nodded, "You are one of us, Susan. You are bonded to an ellon I personally value greatly. If Thranduil cannot see past the fact that you are human, then we will not tolerate his company or his questionable hospitality."

Tears had formed in my eyes as I looked up at them with gratitude, "Thank you. You didn't have to do this, but thank you for taking my security and comfort so seriously."

Celeborn nodded, "I think of you as a daughter. Thranduil has overstepped his bounds by demanding you leave."

Celeborn's admission was the catalyst that opened the damn of tears I had been blinking back. I hugged him and Galadriel, as I cried huge body-wracking sobs. I hadn't known how much stress I had been holding on to until I let go and had the 'ugly cry'. I cried into Celeborn's shoulder as Galadriel rubbed large circles into my back. When I ran out of steam, I let Galadriel lead me back to the bed and make me lie down.

"It is a good thing Celeborn has many changes of clothes with him, as I believe you have made your mark on that tunic," she laughed softly, "You are free with your emotions and have resilience to withstand this. Do not worry any longer, as you have many on your side."

I nodded, too wrung out to reply.

"Sleep, for we will leave in an hour," with that, Galadriel smoothed my brow and as I dozed off into a light snooze, she and Celeborn left.

I was shaken awake by Haldir, as he whispered in my ear, "Susan, wake up. Susan, I have news."

I opened my eyes and let out a big yawn. "Yeah?" I asked sleepily.

"Thranduil is in an uproar about everyone leaving. He is demanding you leave and the rest of us stay. When Galadriel and Celeborn informed him that it was not up for debate, he became livid. Elrond has agreed with the Lord and Lady, and we are readying the horses now."

I sat up slowly, "Thranduil is still trying to get me to leave?"

Haldir nodded, "Yes, and with you, we are all going. He will not bully us. He does not have that right."

Haldir helped me up, and undid the ties to my dress. My riding dress was lying on the trunk at the foot of the bed, as were my riding cloak, gloves and boots. It took a few minutes, but Haldir had me in my travelling gear and was tying the last ribbon on my cloak as a knock at the door sounded. Without waiting for it to be answered, it opened and an angry king strode in, and with that, sucked out all the air in the room.

"_You. You mortal! You have disrupted my visit. You owe me an explanation_," he stood in the middle of the room, tapping his foot impatiently, his hair loose around his shoulders and looking as though it had been recently tossed about.

"_I am sorry your Majesty_?" I didn't know what the hell he was talking about.

"_My visit with the others. You have ruined my visit. Why_?" The room seethed with his fury.

I had no idea where to go with this odd line of questioning, so I decided to wing it. "_Sire, I had no intention to ruin your visit. I have been bonded to Haldir for almost two years and the Lord and Lady of the Golden Wood have accepted me into their clan. I did not know that you did not wish a mortal to enter your woods. However, my husband would not approve of me travelling alone, nor would he leave me for a protracted period, so I travel with him. I go where he goes_," I explained.

Thranduil gave me a cold look, "_I am now aware of your standing within the Galadhrim. It is irrelevant. I cannot have them leave. You must stop them._"

"_So I am allowed to stay_?" I asked.

"_Of course not. No mortal is allowed within the auspices of Eryn Lasgalen ever again. Your kind are not to be trusted_," he retorted.

"_No deal_," I sniffed.

Haldir bit back a laugh as he took my arm and we walked to the door.

"_I would say it has been pleasant, except it has not. So all I will say is good day, sire. I hope you sleep well_," I told him haughtily. And with that, Haldir and I swept out the door.

We hurried out of the palace, and found Galadriel, Celeborn and Elrond waiting on their steeds. Everyone else was either mounting up or checking the supply carts. As Haldir helped me onto my horse, the King strode out onto the terrace.

"_I demand that you not leave_!" he angrily shouted at Galadriel.

"_Does that include the Lady Susan_?" she asked, with a steely glint in her eye.

"_No_!" he bellowed, completely out of control.

"_Then we will not stay_," Galadriel calmly informed him.

Once everyone was on their horses, Galadriel gave the silent command and we turned and began to ride out of the settlement. Thranduil was now incensed. He ran down the stairs and tried to catch up with our retinue.

"_No! No! Do not leave_!" his pleas took on a desperate tone. He was losing face and he knew it, but allies were hard to find when one isolated themselves to the extent that Thranduil had; so he took a risk and said, "_Fine! She stays. Lady Susan may stay_!"

Galadriel winked at me and turned her horse, "_No conditions_?"

"_No conditions_," he grumbled.

"_We will stay_," Galadriel announced, looking pleased as punch. "_See to my luggage, please_?"

Thranduil growled his assent and a few elves from the palace hurried out and started taking trunks from the carts.

"_However, we will not stay long. We do not wish to overtax our host_," Galadriel called out over the throng.

Thranduil just smouldered and stalked back into the palace. I got off my horse as a stable hand rushed out to take the reins. I walked up to Galadriel as she was handing off her steed to another stable hand, and smiled at her.

"You had this planned," I alleged.

Galadriel simply smiled, "I did no such thing."

"Oh please. You totally had his number," I continued.

Galadriel gave me a stare, "His Majesty has had a deep need to be reminded of who his friends are." As she turned to walk to her husband, she shot me a quick wink.

I bit back a laugh as I strolled back to Haldir. He kissed me and we walked back into the palace, so we could go to our rooms and retire.

"Let us annoy his majesty further," he whispered in my ear. "I want to try again for that baby."

I grinned as we sped up our pace to get back to our room. We waited impatiently for our trunks to be placed in our room before we bolted the door and promptly stripped each other naked. Haldir tossed me back on to the bed, and promptly buried his face between my legs. It was not long before I was writhing underneath his arm, and just before I reached my climax, he pulled away and slid himself up in alignment with me. He parted my legs further, and I felt him at my entrance, poking my thigh and opening. Positioning himself, he plunged inside me and I groaned with the intrusion. He began a hard pump, looking at me intently as he thrust into me.

"I love you Susan," he panted.

"Oh god, I love you too, Haldir," I groaned back.

My hips thrust up to meet his and I wrapped my legs around his back to help him go deeper. Our groans and pants filled the room as he thrust with urgency. I quickly fell into a climax, but Haldir kept thrusting. Just when I thought I was losing my mind, Haldir began to climax. His thrusting became erratic and his breathing took on a ragged rhythm. I slid my fingers between my legs and fell back into another climax as Haldir kept thrusting and groaning my name. After he collapsed on me, I clenched my pelvic muscles around his softening erection, garnering a moan from his lips.

"Oh Susan, I need a rest. You have worn me out, my love," he panted as he rolled off me and pulled up the covers.

"I love you Haldir," I whispered back.

We fell asleep, all smelly and sweaty, but sated and happy to not be taken from each others arms.


	21. Chapter 21

Chapter Twenty One-The End of the Long Goodbye

(dialogue in _italics_ is spoken Sindarin)

Our visit with Thranduil was short, only a week, and that was so we could resupply our stores and rest the horses for the next leg of the journey. Elrond was going to pick up the rest of the elves sailing on this journey at Imladris and we were apparently stopping by the Shire to collect a couple of Hobbits. I had never seen a hobbit before, and only knew of their existence from tales I was told by Celeborn, Galadriel and Haldir. I was curious about this tenacious race, as Haldir had told me about the two that had seen to the destruction of the Ring. Apparently there was a ring that was the embodiment of evil and these two hobbits had toiled through dangerous land to see to its destruction.

So while I waited for our next leg of the journey to begin, I spent my time hiding out in our room with Haldir. He kept me occupied with stories and helped me with my Tengwar, as I was utterly hopeless. To keep the King happy, we took meals in our room, and I was snuck out once a day during the mid-day meal to walk in the gardens. It was an odd treaty but at least the King was mollified, he didn't have to look at me and I had a roof over my head. Galadriel and Celeborn would visit after supper, just before we'd retire to bed. They would tell me about the little things that had happened that day and we'd play some games to pass the evening in an amiable fashion. I had gotten used to living in a windowless room, but yearned for the fresh air of outside. The night before we left, Thranduil was kind enough to forgive my trespass, and allow my husband and me to attend the farewell dinner. I didn't know if the King was really okay with this as he seemed quite angry that I was there to begin with and I hoped he hadn't been talked into it. Haldir assured me that Thranduil was not the type to be talked into anything, and he probably was being generous for our last evening.

The dining hall was a study in opposites when we walked in that evening. It was laden with garlands heavy with flowers, at various stations sommeliers stood with wine and the tables groaned under the weight of the food. I looked at Haldir to make sure I wasn't hallucinating.

"This is the King I know, my love. He seems to have had a change of heart," Haldir commented.

We were seated at the back of the hall, which didn't surprise me in the least. I was shocked to have been invited at all, so being at the back of the hall just solidified my expectations of the evening. The food was good and the wine was supposedly among the best the King had in stock. As I didn't drink alcohol, I had to rely on Haldir's judgement about the wine. I enjoyed the evening as it was nice to be among friends once again. Many of the elves we travelled with sat at our table, and it was pleasant to be able to catch up and shoot the breeze with them. All too soon it was the end of the meal, and to my amazement, Thranduil announced that there was to be dancing in the ballroom through the doors at the far end of the dining hall. I wanted to take a walk through the gardens while everyone else was occupied, so Haldir and I snuck out as everyone moved to the other room.

The evening was cool and the gardens were empty as we walked through them. Some of the flowers had closed up for the night, and the buds fairly glowed against the darkness surrounding them. As we walked along the paths we brushed against the leaves of the bushes that lined the way. Billions of stars glittered overhead, tiny jewels against the black liquid expanse of the sky. Haldir had put his arm around me to keep what warmth I had intact, and I leaned into him as we walked silently throughout the garden. We came upon my favourite spot by a pool with a small water feature. Some night jasmine was blooming, filling the air with its delicate fragrance. Sitting down on a small bench, Haldir and I watched the night sky and enjoyed each other's company.

After what seemed like hours, Haldir kissed the top of my head, "It is getting too cool out for you. We should go in."

I involuntarily shivered and nodded, "All right. Let's get to bed. We have to be riding just after dawn, right?"

"Yes, so it would help if you got as much sleep as possible now. You will not have such opportunity as we travel."

With that, we got up and returned to the palace, and back to our room.

I slept hard that night. Haldir had to shake me awake the next morning, I was so fast asleep. I felt like I was dragging through the morning, getting dressed at a sloth-like pace. After eating a light breakfast with Haldir, we went to the stables to get saddled up. The place was brimming with activity as the retinue of elves made sure everything was ready to go and mounted their horses to prepare for the long journey ahead. Galadriel spoke to the King briefly, as did Elrond and Celeborn, before mounting their steeds. With a nod and a wave, Galadriel started us off, out the gates and leaving Eryn Lasgalen, much to my relief. King Thranduil left the moment Galadriel, Celeborn and Elrond went through the gates. I was sure he was as glad to be rid of us as I was glad to get the heck out of dodge.

Our journey to Imladris took just over four weeks. By the time we arrived, I had never been so happy to see something civilised in my life. Throughout the trip, I had been suffering the queasies, and food had become an anathema to me. By the last week, I had been cramping on and off, and vomiting frequently. Haldir was terribly alarmed and the healer advised us that I needed to get to Imladris where I could be properly cared for as soon as possible. I had an inkling that this was a pregnancy gone wrong, as I had missed my last period and I had classic signs of first term pregnancy. The only thing that made this a pregnancy gone wrong was the sharp pain that came and went. The day before we reached Imladris I had breakthrough bleeding. This alarmed the healer and our journey began early the next morning before sunup. A rider had left our encampment not long after I began to bleed, in order to let the healers in Imladris know what was coming.

The healer had me lie down in one of the carts, as she monitored my pain and bleeding as our retinue continued to Imladris. We arrived just before noon, and I was rushed into the healing rooms for care. Their version of a gynaecologist did a pelvic exam and then inserted a poultice into my womb to stop the bleeding and fix the issue. I was told I had suffered from an ectopic pregnancy, and they would try to dissolve the embryo and save my life. Luckily I was only about a month and a bit along, so they felt this could work. Otherwise my life could be held in the balance as they tried to remove the embryo surgically. I had seen their version of surgery, and while it was better than mortal medicine by spades, it wasn't up to modern 21st Century medicine. I was begging god for a good laparoscopic surgeon if this didn't work, I was so upset about the whole thing.

All Haldir could do was hold my hand and wipe away my tears, bless his soul. I knew this was tearing him apart, but I wasn't in any shape to comfort him. I was currently overwhelmed by pain and emotional turmoil as the pregnancy we had been working to have was being sucked away from us. My body was wracked with tears as pain seared through my abdomen. The healer was rubbing it while she checked my heart rate. They had no way to check my BP, but I was sure if they had, it would show as being through the roof.

Elrond had come in at one point, felt my abdomen and spoke quietly to the healer and the gyno. He then came over to my bed and spoke to Haldir.

"_My friend, you need rest as does your wife. I have prescribed a sedative for her, and I would suggest you get some rest while she is sleeping_," he kindly told Haldir.

Haldir gave Elrond a grim smile, "_I wish to sleep near my wife tonight please. I do not want her to wake without me near_."

"_It will be done my friend_," Elrond moved from Haldir's side and spoke to some of the staff that occupied the healing rooms.

While he was arranging for Haldir's sleeping arrangements, I was given a semi-sweet drink that tasted a bit minty. Soon I began to feel sleepy and I kissed my husband's hand as I drifted off to sleep.

The next morning my pain had lessened substantially. I felt relief as the healer proclaimed me past the danger period, once they finished examining me. Haldir gave me a kiss on the head once the healer had walked away.

"Susan, I do not know what I would have done had you succumbed to your illness. I was so worried that we did not have the medicine you are used to from your home," he admitted.

I nodded weakly, still feeling worn out from my ordeal, "Don't worry about it. I survived and that's all that matters. I know you've probably never seen this type of pregnancy before in the elven community, but it's not uncommon for mortal women over the age of 35. I will have to be careful if I get pregnant again, and make sure I am under medical supervision as from what I hear, the chances of having another ectopic pregnancy go up once you've had one."

Haldir tensed at my words, "Perhaps we should not risk your life my love."

I frowned, "It doesn't mean I will have another one Haldir. I am just saying that my chances go up. I can't remember what the odds are, but I know a friend of mine who did have one, was been able to have a normal pregnancy later on."

Haldir looked down at me, "That may be so, but your friend had the benefit of your medicine. I know we are primitive compared to the medical miracles your home is capable of, and I cannot risk losing you to our lack of technology."

"I hate to break it to you Haldir, but even our medicine would be considered primitive compared to other societies more advanced that us. It is all a matter of opinion and level of development. Don't say that Arda will never have what Earth has, because you are at a level we have experienced in the past. Civilisations live and die, and technology and technological advances go with it. You have creativity and desire to have knowledge, and that is the basis for any type of advancement. It is what you do with that, which will determine the outcome of this civilisation," my little speech had tired me out somewhat, and I let myself drift back off to sleep.

My recovery took weeks, and I didn't get to see much of Imladris as I would've liked. I was bedridden for a couple of weeks, and then it was short walks into the garden, with lots of rest under one of the maple trees. After a month, I was allowed to eat with everyone else in the dining hall, and I was released from the healing rooms and went with Haldir into one of the guest rooms overlooking one of the abundant falls surrounding Imladris. Elrond had seen to it that I was kept on the first floor, and he asked Haldir to keep me from doing anything strenuous. By the middle of our second month, I had managed to get my strength back enough to go for light hikes in the woods surrounding Imladris with Haldir. Glorfindel had offered to guide us a couple of times, but Haldir had politely refused, wanting instead to be with me as we worked through our loss and talked about the future. At 37 I knew it was risky to have a child, especially without the medical resources I had at home, but I trusted the elves and I wanted to see if I could bear Haldir his offspring.

At the beginning of September, everyone who was riding to Grey Havens for the sailing to Aman left, along with those who wished to bid them goodbye in the Havens. Elrond's sons had bid farewell to their father the previous evening before our departure, and I had the feeling that Elrond was worried about what choice they would make. Haldir had told me that Elrond and his children were part-elven, or Peredhil, and they had to choice of staying elven and immortal or choosing their human side and becoming mortal. I felt badly that Elrond had to go through all of this loss, as he seemed to be perpetually sad, and I hoped that he would find peace in Aman. Haldir told me that healing happened to those in the Western lands, and I reckoned it was akin to being reborn in the Pure Lands of Amitabha or Pure Land Buddhism.

We arrived on the east side of the Shire on the 22 of September, and it was then that I got a glimpse of the famous hobbits that Haldir had told me about. They were like the little people I saw on the TLC show, "Little People, Big World", except their feet were totally hairy, and as far as I knew, the Roloff's didn't have hairy feet. I wasn't introduced, but that was fine with me. The way everybody was fawning over them, I was sure they'd be worn out from all the attention. I remembered how Hollywood stars would complain about fame and I figured it had to be close to what the hobbits went through.

We travelled through the Shire and on the 28th, late in the afternoon, we arrived at the Grey Havens. It was a port at the mouth of a river that was about the size of the Fraser's north arm. Swan-like ships, sat in the harbour, waiting for their passengers to set sail.

We stayed at an Inn near the water with Elrond, Galadriel and Celeborn. That evening we all laughed, danced and reminisced in the pub below. It was hard to watch Celeborn say goodbye to his wife. They were so tender with each other, it made me kinda teary. I had been talking to Galadriel before we had ridden into Grey Havens, and had pretty much said my goodbyes, but watching Celeborn as he held his wife gently, kissing her forehead and running his hands through her hair made me feel like I hadn't done enough to let Galadriel know how much she would be missed by everyone who didn't sail.

At one point during the evening Galadriel caught my eye and I heard her in my head saying, "It is all right Susan. I know I will be missed. You have done enough, as has everyone else. Thank you for your concern."

The next day was sad as we bid goodbye to Elrond, Galadriel, Mithrandir, and the hobbits Bilbo and Frodo. Two other hobbits had joined our group. Haldir had told me they were Meriadoc Brandybuck and Peregrin Took. They had been on the quest to destroy the ring as well. They did not get on board, but stood beside Samwise Gamgee on the docks and waved sombrely to the tiny hobbits standing on the deck of the ship. Many of the elves that had come with us were sailing; and soon once all the ships had been boarded, they set sail under a bright morning sky. The water was slightly choppy at the river mouth, but I could see out to the ocean which looked considerably smoother.

I sighed as we watched the ships move down the river, and out to the ocean. It was a great day for boating and I wished I was getting into a boat myself and out onto the water. I hearkened back to my childhood when my brother and I had spent many happy summers boating in the Gulf Islands and up the coast. Once we had even made it all the way up the Inside Passage and had a glorious time. I wished the elves sailing would have calm seas and the wind kept at their back so they could make it to their destination in safety. Once the ships reached the ocean, we all turned and headed back into the city for lunch and to sort ourselves out after the long goodbye.


	22. Chapter 22

Chapter Twenty Two-Wish Upon a Star

(Dialogue in _italics_ is spoken Sindarin)

The trip back to Imladris was uneventful. Once we had returned, the elves that decided to stay were quickly bringing order back to the daily operations of the tiny realm. I finally got to enjoy the beauty of the place. The waterfalls and mountains were spectacular, and reminded me of Vancouver and made me a little homesick. I guess I had been feeling a bit homesick since we lost the baby, but I had been trying to ignore that little voice that told me I needed my daddy. My father and I were especially close, and had spent loads of time pursuing interests that we shared when I was growing up. After Haldir and I lost the baby, I felt like I really needed my Dad to just give me some much needed familiarity. It didn't mean that I didn't rely on Haldir, but having your daddy around just seems to make things better, at least to me it seemed to.

Haldir had noticed the mood I had wrapped myself in, and even though we had talked, cried and worked through the loss of the baby, he just couldn't seem to break through the shell I had enclosed myself in, trying to hide my homesickness. I hate to be a bother to people, and I knew that Haldir would be bothered by me being upset. There was nothing we could do about my not being back on Earth. Mithrandir, Galadriel and Elrond had all sailed and any power to help me out was gone. At least I thought so. So I hid my homesickness and tried to act normal, even though Haldir wasn't buying it.

One day, after all of our things had been shipped up from Imladris, Haldir approached me as I sat in our sitting room, sewing a hem that had come unravelled when I was hiking through the woods that surrounded the chateau. He had a look in his eye that meant he wasn't going to brook any argument with me, and I tried to ignore the feeling that things were about to go badly.

"Susan," he began, taking the sewing from my hands, "Susan, we need to talk."

I sighed and sat back in my chair, "Uh-huh."

"Susan, I know you are feeling upset about something and have not seen fit to talk to me about it. You need to tell me, so we can work together to make this issue better," he told me, sitting down on the divan across from me.

"Nothing's wrong, Haldir," I sighed. I didn't want to have this conversation.

"Nonsense. I can feel what you are feeling through our bond, Susan. I just do not know where this is coming from," he gently advised.

I bit my lip. I knew Haldir, having been married to him for two and a half years, and I knew that he would not let this lie. He'd niggle at me until I gave in.

"It is nothing that we can solve. We don't have the means anymore," I told him as I stared out the window to my side.

Haldir looked at me quizzically, "Susan?"

I got up and moved to his side, "Trust me baby. Nothing we can do. I'll get over it. Don't you worry about me."

A look dawned on his face and he pulled me down beside him, "Home. You miss your home, do you not?"

A wave of guilt washed over me. It was selfish to wish to be at home. I was with my husband and that should be enough, but it wasn't. I really wanted to be back home. As if on cue, Roxy came in from the bedroom and curled up by my feet. Having such a tangible reminder of home, sitting at my feet, did me in. Tears welled up in my eyes and I fought the urge to cry using the time tested method of waving my hands in front of my face. That didn't do a damned bit of good, as the tears began to drop onto my cheeks and my face flamed in embarrassment.

I shook my head, "Please don't be mad." I knew Haldir would feel responsible, as my husband seems to think he's responsible for the happiness of the entire world, or so it seems.

"I am not, but why did you not think to tell me? I could help," he soothed.

"I miss home, Haldir. Home. As in Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada, planet Earth. I miss my Dad and my Mom. I even miss that stupid brother of mine. I miss my nephew and niece. I miss Alistair. I miss June. I miss Matcha lattes at Blenz. I miss my books and DVDs. I miss curling up on the couch on a Saturday night, reading a new tome. I miss Indian food! I miss the internet. I miss blogging on Livejournal. My life has been irrevocably changed, and I accepted it, but that doesn't mean I can't miss the life I left behind," I ranted.

Haldir gave me a long look, "I knew we should have asked Mithrandir for a way back before he left."

"Well, we didn't. I've got to deal with it. Bummer for me," I groused.

He got up off the divan and looked down at me, "Since you have made up your mind…" He trailed off, leaving me to finish the sentence.

"I'll be fine," I offered lamely.

Haldir did the unexpected, "Then I will leave you to your thoughts." With that he walked out the door, taking Roxy with him.

I sat stunned on the divan, and then perplexingly began to cry.

Over the next few days Haldir spoke to me only when he needed to, and left me alone for the most part. I think I offended him when I told him exactly what was bugging me, but I wasn't sure. Just as the alone time was beginning to get to me, Glorfindel joined me. He met me in one of the gardens, while I sat on a stone bench and brooded.

"_Good day my lady. How are you this fine day_?" he asked, standing before me, blocking the weak winter sun.

"_I am well my lord, and you_?" I asked politely.

Glorfindel had been away quite a bit as he had been left in charge of the security of Imladris, and had been out on patrols with the twins since we had arrived back from the Havens. I had often wondered why he had not sailed, as he was very fond of Elrond. I had found out from him that they were best friends and he had known Elrond from the time Elrond was young. I had no idea what 'young' meant. For beings that were immortal, he could've meant 12 or 2000.

"_I am well my lady. It has come to my attention that you miss your homeland. Is this so_?"

I nodded, "_Yes. I miss home._"

He nodded sombrely, "_Your husband is worried that he has failed you._"

I looked at him, shocked. "_What? Why_?"

Glorfindel smiled, "_Haldir believes he should be able to take you home. He cannot. Therefore he feels he has failed you._"

Chagrined, I said, "_He should not feel that way. There is nothing he can do. I do not blame him for this issue._"

Glorfindel nodded again, "_Your husband is just being himself. Haldir has long believed that he can solve any issue. He has yet to realize that he does not have that power_."

We ended up sitting for a while just watching the grey sky above and chatting amicably about life. Glorfindel found out more about my home and I found out more about his life here in Imladris.

Glorfindel ended up being a good friend to me during those dark months. Haldir and I worked out the crux of the issue, but Glorfindel became one of our closest friends during this period. He spoke to Haldir, and he spoke to me. Then Haldir and I spoke to each other. As Glorfindel was not married, I ended up inviting him over for a lot of cold evenings, to play games or talk. When he was away on patrol, Haldir and I missed his company. He was a calm force and I enjoyed that.

I suppose this may have been perceived as odd, to have an unmarried elf over so much, and have him so integrated into our home, but it seemed natural. Lorien was finally empty, and Haldir's brothers had sailed after Galadriel had. Celeborn was getting to know his grandsons and was kept busy with running Imladris. My husband's duties had been cut back somewhat, as Glorfindel and he both had the same job. As Imladris wasn't Haldir's home, he didn't go out on many patrols, but he did handle a lot of the administration. Glorfindel took over what would've been my husband's patrols and enjoyed his respite from the ugly world of paperwork.

Our attempts to get pregnant again were not successful. I knew that at thirty-nine, it would be difficult to get pregnant, and being in such a primitive world, there was a very good chance I would not conceive at all. I accepted this for what it was. An opportunity to get Haldir to sail. I figured that if we didn't end up having children, he would sail as I got older. At least I hoped he would.

The months passed into years, and before I knew it, I had been in Arda for three years. We had grown comfortable, even though I still missed Vancouver. No children had come along, so I kept busy with helping one of the administrators, Erestor, keep the library in order. Erestor was a font of knowledge, and I enjoyed the afternoons I spent with him among the dusty tomes. I was interested to find out that he had fought in the great battle of the first age that Glorfindel and Elrond had fought in. I couldn't picture him as a warrior, but he just shook off my amusement and let me know that battles should not be glamorized. I told him about the wars that my planet had seen, and told him that war was never a game, but it was important to remember them, so we didn't make those same mistakes in the future.

As we came up upon the anniversary of when Haldir came back to Arda, that fateful January night, I began to dream deeply detailed dreams of being back at home. We were in a new home, but we were at home and happy. I would wake up longing for it to be real, but no such luck. We were still in Arda, and I was no closer to being able to get home. While Arda and Imladris were beautiful, it wasn't home. It had never become home.

The dreams persisted for a month before I had a dream of Haldir and I back in the mists where I had met Mithrandir for the first time.

"Ah, my lady. Haldir," Mithrandir appeared from the mists, "It is good to see you once again."

"Mithrandir!" I nearly hugged him, but remembered to just curtsey in response.

"Mithrandir. How do you fare?" my husband asked formally.

"I fare well, _mellon_," he nodded, "I have news."

We waited.

His eyes crinkled as he watched us wait, "I see you wish to cut to the quick of the matter. Very well. I will tell you. Susan, you and your husband have been granted passage home. As has a third been granted passage with you."

"What?" I asked, "What third?"

"Me," a voice came out of the mists. It was Glorfindel. "I have been wanting to see what lies beyond Arda and Aman, and the Valar have granted my wish."

"But Celeborn…" I trailed off.

"Is sailing in the Spring. His grandsons will sail when they deem fit. I have lived in Aman and I have lived here in Arda. I wish to experience something new," he explained.

"You're speaking English," I said.

"I am speaking the tongue of the other realm, as are you."

Haldir spoke up, "Why? Why do you wish to come with us? You have many friends in Aman."

"As do you. I wish to see Susan's world first hand. She has painted an interesting picture," he replied.

Mithrandir piped up, "Lord Glorfindel will also help Haldir sail, once you have left this plane of existence."

I gasped. That was the big finale! Haldir would sail once I died, and he wouldn't sail alone. He would sail with our friend. I felt relief wash over me like a tsunami. My legs felt weak as Haldir held me close.

"It is an answer to prayer," he breathed in my ear.

I nodded, too overcome with emotion for words.

"It will not be as easy as you think Susan. Haldir and Glorfindel will be essentially human for their time spent on Earth. After your demise they will only have six months to set sail in your Pacific Ocean to be able to cross over to Aman. After that, if they have not left, they will live out the remainder of their lives as human and will die within a few years of you," Mithrandir warned.

"We will accept the offer!" Haldir boomed.

"Glorfindel?" Mithrandir asked.

Glorfindel laughed, "For the ability to live a few decades as Susan does, in her homeland? I accept. I readily accept."

"Then it is done. You are now named for your life on Earth. Glorfindel, you are now known as Finn Methuen. Haldir, you have taken your wife's name?" he looked at Haldir.

Haldir nodded, "I have."

"Then you shall be known by your wife's name. Please be ready one week from tonight for the crossing. Say your goodbyes and gather your things."

"What about the time that has passed?" I asked, "People will think I am dead."

"You will be returned one month after you had left. Your life will continue as it has now, and you will be three years older than when you left. May I suggest you retry for that child you desired," he winked.

My heart seized. Child! Did he mean that I would have one? Mithrandir just winked at me and said nothing.

"One week. Be in the courtyard by the front entrance and you may cross there," he advised as he walked back into the mists.

I awoke as Haldir did, with a start. We just looked at each other and grabbing our robes, we ran out of our room into the hallway. Glorfindel was running down the hall towards us.

"_We cross_?" he asked.

"_We cross_," Haldir confirmed.

We danced around the hallway in joy silently into the wee hours of the morning, laughing quietly at our wonderful luck.

_Mellon_-my friend


	23. Chapter 23

**Chapter Twenty Three- Home Again, Home Again**

(Dialogue in _italics_ is spoken Sindarin)

The week passed quickly, and before I knew it, we had said our goodbyes and were all waiting out in the courtyard under the cold evening sky. Glorfindel looked like he was going to explode from the excitement, while Haldir just looked concerned. I knew he was worried about the trip back, but I was so happy to be going home, I couldn't be bothered to echo his sentiment. Roxy was dancing around our ankles, knowing something big was up, but unsure as to exactly what. Lord Celeborn and the twins stood near us, looking both concerned and sad.

"_You will all be missed very much_," Celeborn said with gravity.

"_I will miss you on patrol, my friend. It will be lonely without you_," one of the twins spoke up. I thought it may've been Elladan.

"_I am on patrol with you, fool. What are you talking about? Lonely, pah_," Elrohir scoffed.

Glorfindel smiled, "_I will miss both of you too_."

The twins grinned back at him and then looked over at Haldir. "_We will miss your skills with the bow as well, my friend_," Elrohir told him sincerely.

Before Haldir could respond in kind, a portal opened up a few feet from our position. Haldir and I picked up our bags and I took Roxy's leash. Glorfindel shook the twins' hands, and nodded to Celeborn.

"_I will see you and the Lady in a few decades, my friend. Then we will drink fine wine and be merry_," he told Celeborn.

Waving to Celeborn and the twins, I was the first to step through the portal, with Roxy and my bags. I nearly fell out of the portal on the other end, but remembering the tumble I took the first time I went through, I managed to catch myself. It was dark on Howe Street, with the street lights flickering gently against the blackened sky, and I was never so happy to see Vancouver again as I was at that moment in my life. I moved out of the way, watching the street carefully. Not a soul was anywhere near our position, which relieved me as I couldn't explain a lick of this if I tried. Glorfindel joined me on the street as he gracefully stepped out of the portal. I gently moved him out of the way, as a bus trundled down Hastings, past our little scene without so much as a by-your-leave. I breathed a sigh of relief as I saw Haldir step through the portal. Glorfindel was too busy to notice Haldir's arrival, as he was looking everywhere but the passage between our worlds. The portal closed up after Haldir passed through and the light wind that was kicking around the opening disappeared with it.

Glorfindel shifted his pack and looked at me, "_Where are we going to go now_?"

"_To get the keys to our place from my friend Alistair, and then back to the apartment_," I answered, as I picked up the bag by my feet and turned to walk up Howe Street.

It took about twenty minutes, but finally I was at Alistair's building and pressing the buttons for his place. The call was answered on the third ring and a groggy voice asked who was there.

"Alistair? It's me, Susan," I shouted into the tiny box.

A muffled grunt and suddenly the voice became clearer. "Susan? Susan? Is that really you?"

"Alistair? Are you going to let us up, or are we going to freeze our butts off out here all night?" I retorted.

I heard a muffled curse and then the buzzer went off. I opened the door and Haldir helped me get through with my huge bags. Glorfindel was still staring at the call box when Haldir yanked him through the door.

"_Trust me, my friend. You are in for many more surprises. Try not to panic when we go up in the _elevator," Haldir cautioned.

"Ely-vay-tor?" Glorfindel tried the word out carefully on his tongue.

"Elevator," I reassured him. "_Do not worry. You will be fine_."

"I wish I had known that the first time I went on that thing," Haldir muttered under his breath.

I smiled as Glorfindel gave Haldir a quizzical look. The trip on the elevator went better than expected. Glorfindel just clutched our arms as Roxy barked helpfully at his feet. The door to Alistair's place was open and an anxious Alistair looked out. I practically ran into his arms, except my baggage slowed me down quite a bit.

"Oh my god!" Alistair squealed, "It's really you!"

I hugged him and look into the apartment. Steve was standing in the living room, looking dishevelled and confused.

"Sorry to bug you so late," I apologized. I looked at the clock hanging in the hallway. It was after 1am, and I knew I was interrupting their sleep. "What day is it?" I whispered to Alistair.

"Tuesday," he whispered back. "You've been gone a month." He looked at Haldir and nodded, "Hey Hal."

Haldir scowled at the nickname that Alistair had given him. "I had forgotten about that."

Alistair giggled and then caught sight of Glorfindel. His mouth dropped open and he grabbed my arm. "Who is Gorgeous over there?" he stage whispered. Steve gave him a dirty look.

"Never you mind," I snapped, "He's not for your indulgence."

"_Susan, your friend is looking at me as though I were his next meal_." Glorfindel told me with slight anxiety.

"Alistair, stop it. You're making him uncomfortable. _Glorfindel, he will not hurt you. Just ignore him_." I advised them.

Haldir just grinned and putting down his bags, he walked up to Steve. "Steve, it is good to see you again. I trust all is well with you?"

"Yes, Haldir. I hope your visit with your family went well? You were gone quite some time," Steve answered graciously.

"They are very well, thank you. I am glad to be home though," Haldir told him sincerely.

"Keys?" I asked Alistair.

"Sorry," he pulled my keychain off his hall table and handed them to me. "I've watered the plants, your mail is on the kitchen table and if I'd known you were coming home tonight, I would've had food sitting in your fridge. Alas…"

"Thank you, Alistair. You've been great. I'm sure you want to hit the pit, so I'll get out of your hair and I'll call you in the morning, okay?" I patted his hand.

"Oh c'mere you silly git," Alistair swept me up into a bear hug. "I've missed you like crazy. Call me the minute you get up."

Haldir took Roxy's leash and with keys in hand, we left Alistair and Steve to their own devices. It was another five minute walk to get back to our apartment, and I was thrilled when I stepped across the threshold and back into my cozy abode. Turning on the hall lights and the living room lights, I dropped my bags by the bedroom hallway entrance.

"_Come in, Glorfindel. I will make you up a bed on the couch. It should only be a temporary solution, as I will need to look for a larger apartment for all of us_." I explained.

"_The floor will be fine_," Glorfindel assured me.

"_Do not be ridiculous. You will have the couch until I can obtain a bed for you_," I told him.

Quickly I made up the couch as a bed and before another word could be said, I ran into the bathroom. There it sat, in all its glory. The object I had missed deeply since I left Earth. My toilet. I ran my hand reverently over the top and grabbed the handle. Haldir came to stand by the door and watched as I raised the lid. I smiled at him, and looking down into the clear water, I flushed. My heart twittered as the water swirled down the bowl and into the pipes below. The sound was music to my ears. I waited for the water to rise, and readied myself for more joy.

"You missed that a little too much," he told me archly.

I smirked at him, "Not enough."

He knew all about my toilet trauma, and I knew he was just humouring me as I flushed the toilet a second time. Triumphant, I stood up and shut the lid.

"That was fabulous," I announced.

"You are really odd," he pronounced.

"And you married me despite this," I grinned.

"I am a fool," he pulled me into a hug.

I nodded sagely as I rubbed my face into his jersey. "C'mon. Let's get you into your pj's. It's late and I'd like to get some stuff done later today," I dragged him out of the bathroom and down the hall into the bedroom.

Rummaging through the bureau, I found his bottoms and tossed them to him. I pulled out my jammies and quickly stripped out of my old clothing, and got into my cozy flannels. They weren't Haldir's favourites, but they kept me from freezing on cold winter nights. I felt like I had been cold forever, living in Imladris, but I was determined to get warm again. After I was dressed, I grabbed my terrycloth robe and trotted down the hall to check on Glorfindel.

"_Do you need anything, Glorfindel_?" I called, not daring to peek around the corner in case he was indecent.

"_I am fine, Susan. Come here, please_," he called. I came around the corner and saw he was under the covers on the couch. "_Thank you for taking me in, Susan. I am looking forward to seeing more of your world and seeing how people live here_."

"_I know I will enjoy showing my world to you, and I know Haldir will enjoy showing you his discoveries as well_," I smiled.

Turning off all the lights, I went back to the bedroom, leaving Roxy, who chose to sleep by Glorfindel's feet. I crawled into my slightly stale bed with Haldir and turned off the bedside lamp. In the darkness I felt Haldir shift and turn into my side as I curled up beside him. I was home and back on familiar territory. I knew that the next decades would go well as I had my husband back, our best friend, our other friends and my family to support us.


	24. Chapter 24

**Chapter Twenty Four- Back to Basics**

(Dialogue in _italics _is spoken Sindarin)

The next morning, I introduced Glorfindel to the new world. Haldir and I dressed Glorfindel in some of Haldir's clothes and we took him out for breakfast, in an attempt to get him acclimatized as quickly as possible. Glorfindel was stunned by the sight of his first car. We had arrived so late the previous night, and it being a weeknight, we had managed to not see any cars directly, only hearing the sounds of light traffic. Glorfindel just about jumped out of his skin when the car sped down the narrow street in front of our building. Haldir smirked, while I punched his arm and shot him a dirty look.

"_It is all right Glorfindel. That is what we call a _car_, and it is merely a mechanical device to transport people from one destination to another_," I explained.

Glorfindel gave me a shaky smile and took refuge between Haldir and me, as he walked with us to Davie Street, and we made our way over to Milestone's for a hearty breakfast. Needless to say, this was also a shock to Glorfindel's system. Milestone's is famous for its brunch. On weekends, the brunch is legendary and the place is always packed, no matter where the location. Glorfindel had a Milestone's Mimosa and the Californian Omelette. A huge platter was served to him, with the lovely omelette, cantaloupe, and a side of Milestone's breakfast potatoes. I know he'd never seen anything like that before, knowing what the cuisine was like in Arda.

Once breakfast had been consumed, I paid with my bank card and we went outside to wander down Denman and see what was open. The Royal Bank was, so we went inside, and I checked my accounts and spoke with my PBR about getting a mortgage. I was already thinking ahead about upsizing, and I figured getting a condo or a townhouse would be a good idea. After the bank, which consisted of much ogling by Glorfindel at all the machines and people getting cash from ATMs and tellers, I spent some time explaining how banking worked in Canada. We walked up Robson, and made our way to Sears on the corner of Howe and Robson. I picked up a few items of clothing for Glorfindel, as Haldir was broader in the shoulders, and Glorfindel looked a tad ridiculous with Haldir's shirts bagging out around him. By this time Glorfindel was overwhelmed by everything he saw, so we made our way back to the apartment to rest.

When we returned, I saw that a packet was sitting on my dining room table, which had not been there earlier. Haldir insisted upon opening it, suspecting foul play. It ended up being a letter from Mithrandir, and identification for both Haldir and Glorfindel. The letter was in Sindarin, and gave us instructions on how to apply for citizenship for both Haldir and Glorfindel. I supposed that Mithrandir had arranged for the applications to be processed, but I had no idea how his influence spread so far. The ID consisted of passports from Norway, that also contained Permanent Residence cards, as well as birth certificates, Care Cards for the Medical Services Plan, and BC ID cards for both elves. I went to our computer and downloaded the application forms, and we spent the rest of the day filling out the paperwork, and giving the information that Mithrandir had set out in his letter to us. Glorfindel was fascinated that our government system was so complex that we required applications for citizenship, as in Arda nothing so bureaucratic was required.

Alistair and Steve came over around dinnertime and we cooked up the food they had brought us. I knew I had to make it to the grocery store the next day, as we didn't have time, due to filling out the citizenship forms. Alistair had figured we had been busy and had kindly brought over dinner and a few staples to fill our fridge until we could get to the store.

"When do you go back to work?" Alistair asked after he swallowed a bite of pasta we'd made for the meal.

"I have to call and see when they want me to come back. I'll do that tomorrow, but I figure I will most likely be back to work in the next couple of weeks. Speaking of work, will you and Steve help Finn learn English? He's going to need it here."

Haldir looked at me, "I will help Finn learn English."

I smiled at my husband, "I know, but he needs to learn faster than you did. We have to get him up to date on everything 'Canada', so he'll be prepared for the citizenship test."

Steve gave me a funny look, "Don't you have to live in Canada for three or four years first?"

Oops, I had forgotten that Steve didn't know the whole truth about Haldir and where he came from. I grinned and said, "We've got a special dispensation for Finn. He has skills that are needed in Canada."

While I was hoping for the lie to take, Glorfindel piped up and said, "_May I have some more of this delicious supper_?"

Haldir got up and filled Glorfindel's plate, as Steve mulled over what I had said.

"All right," he decided, "So when will he be doing the test?"

"I don't know. But it will probably be in the next two to three months," I replied.

Alistair came to my rescue, "Okay, then we have plenty of time to bring Finn up to speed on all that is Canadian and polish his English skills. Why don't we start now, over a little dessert, hmm?"

And with that, Glorfindel began his tutelage with Alistair and Steve in the English language.

The days flew by as Glorfindel became acclimatized to Canada, and became more proficient in English. Haldir had managed to reconnect with all of his contacts, and this led to a job as head of security for a biotech firm out in Burnaby. Glorfindel caught work as a model, mostly local, but he did do a few romance novel covers before he cut his hair for jobs in Europe and America. The citizenship applications came through three and a half months after we had sent them in, and Haldir and Glorfindel were only too happy to be on a Canadian passport at last.

One day, after we had moved into a four bedroom character home in Kitsilano, which all three of us had to sign the mortgage note on, just so we could afford it; I woke up to an unfamiliar feeling in the pit of my stomach. We had been back in Vancouver for almost a year at that point and in the new house for about five months. Haldir barely stirred in bed beside me, when I suddenly had the overwhelming need to puke my guts up. I jumped out of bed and ran to the loo, just in time to throw up the contents of my stomach. While I was hunched over the toilet, wondering what could be the cause of my stomach bug; Haldir joined me, kneeling beside the porcelain bowl.

"Susan? Are you feeling all right?" he asked gently.

I puked my response.

Haldir held back my hair as I continued to vomit for distance, and he touched my clammy skin. After a moment, he let go of my hair and got up to wet a washcloth. Once my multi-coloured symphony was over, he gently cleaned me up and helped me back to bed.

Smiling at me, he said softly, "Susan, I think it is time to call for an appointment with the doctor."

"What on earth are you talking about? It's probably just the flu. Or I ate something odd," I replied weakly.

Haldir's smile turned into a grin, "You will want to confirm my diagnosis, my love, but you are suffering from pregnancy, not the flu."

"What!?!" I gasped from the shock of his words.

"We are going to have a baby," he kissed my icky skin.

I was flummoxed by the news. We had never stopped trying since I had lost the baby in Arda. Once I had gotten over my grief, Haldir and I had begun to try for another pregnancy, and once we returned to Earth, we had seen a specialist to make sure my miscarriage had not damaged my uterus irrevocably. We had been told that it may be tricky to get pregnant, but it was not impossible, and if we couldn't conceive after another year of trying, the fertility doctor would get us started on treatments to help us along. I looked into my husband's eyes and saw only happiness. Relief swept my body, followed by disgust.

"So yay for pregnancy, but I should hope I'm not going to have morning sickness like this everyday," I said, hoping I didn't sound like a total jerk.

Haldir laughed, "Have you forgotten that I am part of the Eldar? Both Glorfindel and I have been trained in the healing arts, and we have not forgotten our lessons. We have natural remedies for your nausea, so you should be fine during your pregnancy."

This news made me very happy, and I hugged Haldir awkwardly, as I was still a bit weak from my parade of vomit. Haldir got off the bed and walked to our bedroom door.

"I will tell Glorfindel right now, and once you are feeling fit, we will have a celebratory orange juice."

The word 'juice' sent a queasy feeling through my tummy, and as I blanched, Haldir back-pedalled on his statement.

"Perhaps we will make you that tea for your stomach, and Glorfindel and I will break open the juice?"

I nodded, and Haldir left our room to go downstairs and tell Glorfindel, who was no doubt busy making breakfast. When Glorfindel was at home, which was beginning to be a bit of a rarity now that his career had taken off, he liked to be domestic. Never before had I had such a tidy house and excellent meals on the table. Roxy adored him, and followed him everywhere. He spoiled Haldir and me with his kindness and generosity, and I knew he would be happy for the both of us and our impending child.

I heard a yelp and loud laughter, followed by a thunder of footsteps on the stairs. Glorfindel swept into the room, all energy and happiness, as he surveyed the mess that was me.

"Congratulations!" he cried, as he leaped onto the bed. "This is such exciting news! May I be the first to offer my services as a wet nurse?"

I laughed weakly, "And when would you be available to do that? You are booked well into next year."

Glorfindel winked at me, "As long as you have a healthy baby, I am willing to rebook, cancel, whatever. I know how long you have wanted a child, and this is a miracle for both of you."

"What about you? Don't you want someone to have your own children with?" I asked.

"Perhaps. Perhaps my destiny is to be alone, with you two as my constant companions. We will see what Eru bestows upon me," he said seriously.

Haldir came into the room with my tea and Glorfindel moved over to the chair beside the bed and watched us intently.

"This tea will help ease your nausea, and once you are feeling up to it, we will call the doctor and see him as soon as possible," Haldir handed me a steaming mug of lightly scented tea, which I sipped cautiously.

A couple of days later, we managed to get into see the specialist. He confirmed our news and gave me instructions as to how I should conduct my pregnancy. We were all concerned about my losing the baby, so I was given strict instructions, a diet to follow, and he warned me that I may have to resort to bed-rest if things got dicey.

After a few days at home, Glorfindel was off to Europe for work, and Haldir and I sank back into our schedules. I didn't want to inform work until I knew that the baby was going to stick, but I knew I'd have to tell my manager once I began to show.

After the requisite three months had passed, and I was deemed as doing well by my doctor, we told my family. Needless to say, my folks were beside themselves with joy, and even my brother was happy for me. He still needled me about waiting so long to have a baby, but I ignored it, instead concentrating on how wonderful it was to make it past a month.

One day, Glorfindel came home from a shoot in the Caribbean with some news. He had met a girl. She wasn't one of the models, but was a location manager for the magazine that Glorfindel was shooting with. She was originally from Zambia, and was apparently not only exotic and beautiful, but smart and funny. When I asked when the wedding was, Glorfindel told me he hoped she would be amenable to moving in with us. He wanted to take baby steps. I was showing quite prominently by this point, and I wondered if this girl, whose name was Katherine, would be okay with living with another family. Glorfindel seemed sure that Katherine would be fine with our living arrangements, and since he was so happy, I decided to be happy for him.

Katherine ended up not moving in with us, so Glorfindel spent quite a bit of time in New York, courting her formally. Haldir prepped the baby's room, and we found out that we were having a baby boy. My dream came back to me when I got that news, and I wondered if he would be the tow-headed child I saw in my dream. Alistair and Steve had gotten engaged amidst all the hubbub and were planning an August wedding. I was due in late September, so I knew I'd be the size of a house when I stood up for Alistair.

Haldir was so relieved that my pregnancy was going well; he kept a blog to let our friends know how I was doing, which he peppered with digital photos of my ever-growing belly. I was amused at his pride and teased him about his status as father-to-be.

After a low-key ceremony for Alistair and Steve in August, we sent them off on their honeymoon on a cruise to Alaska. My belly was huge by this point, and I spent most of my time in a seated position. The only problem was that every position was dreadfully uncomfortable, so instead of standing at Alistair's wedding, I stood, sat, wiggled about, and generally distracted everyone at the ceremony.

On September 15th I finally went into labour, a smidge early, and Haldir rushed me to the hospital. Glorfindel had come home, not long after we had left for VGH, and he had quickly figured out where we had gone, rushing to meet us at the hospital. While Haldir and I went through the labour, which was hard on me as the baby was a whopping 10lbs 5oz; Glorfindel phoned all my relatives and our friends to let them know what was going on.

After fifteen hours of labour, and the exhaustion of every swear word I knew in both languages, I gave birth to a healthy baby boy. His ears were not as pointed as Haldir's, but did have tiny little points indicating his heritage. He had a shock of whitish-blond hair, almost the same colour as his father's. I knew his eyes would be a bluish-green, from what I remembered from my dream. As I held the tiny bundle in my arms, tears ran down my cheek.

"Are you happy, my love?" Haldir softly asked me.

"Very," I replied with a sob.

We cuddled our son and kissed each other while the doctor and nurses bustled around us. It was a beautiful day for our little family.


	25. Chapter 25

**Chapter Twenty Five – Probability**

I know a lot of time has passed since Matthias was born, but things kind of exploded after his birth. Glorfindel quit the modelling world so he could pursue his love for directing film. He spends most of his time in Los Angeles, but has a penchant for filming his movies here in Vancouver. It means he spends some time with us at home, and he ended up giving Matthias the acting bug. Matty was five when he first began acting in small walk-on roles in Glorfindel's movies, and now that he's sixteen, he's acting fulltime in a Sci-Fi show that shoots here for five months a year. He's quite the heartthrob, according to the teen magazines. I guess his white-blond hair and light green-blue eyes doesn't hurt, but I truly think that my husband's strong physique, passed down to Matty, is the real ticket to hunkdom. Matty is a younger version of Haldir, but he has my lips and eyes, and most importantly, my sense of humour. Haldir has taught Matty many skills, but I think the most important is that of knowing who he is, especially in Hollywood where one can lose their identity so easily.

Haldir moved from being head of security of someone else's firm to owning a very successful high tech security company, which has gained quite a reputation in Canada and the United States. Haldir is hoping to branch out to Asia and Europe, and in the next five years, he hopes to have branches in London, Paris, Tokyo, and Hong Kong. I'm hoping he hasn't bitten off more than he can chew.

We moved out of Kitsilano, and now we live out in Tsawwassen, right on the beach. I love the schools and the local grocery stores, and the fact that I can walk the beach at night and still feel safe. Matty teases me about my penchant for midnight walks, but my neighbours got used to it relatively quickly. I was only confronted by the local police once, and that was because one of my neighbours didn't know we had moved in down the beach from them, and thought I was some kid, looking for somewhere to break in. Once the police walked me back to our new home, woke my husband from a sound sleep and gotten a reasonable explanation, everything evened out. I just made sure I went around the next day and introduced myself to everyone on the beach.

I left my job with the Government, in order to raise Matty, and never went back. Now I write for an online magazine, and enjoy the perks of a husband who makes more than I do. The writing freed me up for shuttling Matty to and from auditions and to acting gigs. I like my life as it is now. I have a great husband, a son who makes me laugh and has promised to buy me a vacation home in Hawaii when he makes it big. I have that in writing, better safe than sorry, I say. Plus, I love to bug Matty by dragging out the contract when he's being petulant with me over curfew or something stupid, as I remind him he owes me big and I'm waiting for my payback.

Glorfindel has a home in L.A., but stays in the guest bedroom whenever he's in town. He's had a few girlfriends throughout the years, but nobody ever stuck. Katherine hasn't been around since Matty turned one, and I guess Glorfindel figures that he's happier being single than attached. Glorfindel was a bit of a lone ranger back in Arda, too, so I can't say I'm terribly surprised. He gets companionship when he wants it, and buries himself in work the rest of the time. Just like he did back in Arda. Some things never change.

Haldir was aging more gracefully than I, as he could pass for someone in their forties, and not someone who was fast approaching sixty, as it said on his "birth certificate". My rush up to sixty was full of new grey hairs, creams to fight wrinkles that kept appearing on my forehead, around my eyes, and neck, and getting used to having breasts that slowly but surely were making their way down to my waist. Sure, I had all the plastic surgery help I could wish for, but I didn't want to look like one of those women who couldn't have an emotion if their life depended on it. I chose to age somewhat gracefully and only used hair dye and wrinkle cream. Plus, we ate well and exercised daily. I would make the hike up the hill to the mailboxes every morning at as fast a clip as I could manage without falling down and gasping for breath. We had a treadmill in the den, and I used that during mucky weather. Haldir has a metabolism that astounds me. He can go to the climbing gym for a few hours and look like he'd been putting in hours everyday at the gym.

Alistair and Steve had adopted a baby girl two years into their marriage, and now that she was a teenager, she would come out to hang out with Matty when her folks wanted time to themselves. Angie fancied herself a bit of an actress, but everytime Matty would get her an audition for something, she'd blow it, so her dreams of following in Matty's footsteps were dashed everywhere but in her mind. Matty was the kind older "cousin" and never let on that he thought she was a terrible actress, even though he would complain to me about how Angie made him look to the producers and casting agents he had sent her to. I would tell him to stop sending her out, and break her lack of talent gently to her, but Matty has a soft heart and can't hurt someone's feelings even when they need to hear the truth.

Angie doesn't know the truth about Matty and Haldir, and neither does her father, Steve, but Alistair keeps the secret close to his heart. Now that I am getting old and grey, I am becoming more and more concerned about Haldir and Glorfindel's sailing once I passed, so I confided my fears to Al. Al promised me to make sure Matty would be all right, should he survive me, and Matty knew the scoop. While Matty knew the story behind his father and favourite "uncle", he didn't have the whole picture. He saw his father aging, albeit slowly, and I felt that maybe he thought we were telling him some kind of myth. I needed Al to make sure that when I passed, Matty was fully prepared to lose his father too. As far as I know, Matty would die just like I would, and would never see his father again, after Haldir and Glorfindel sailed. I had made a bargain with the powers that be to have my husband with me in this world, but now that we had a child, it sure made things that much more complicated.

My parents had passed within a year of each other a couple of years back. David and Patricia were a mess, as they had taken over the care of our parents when Mom and Dad got too feeble to be independent anymore. I saw my parents every few days, and it was hard to lose them, but somehow I didn't suffer like David did. David worshiped the ground our father walked on, and when Dad went first, David lost it. Mom was doing very poorly, but David just couldn't be there for her, so Patricia took up the reins. I did everything I could, but Patricia was the real hero with out mother. She even held Mom's hand when she passed. I had just left for the evening, when Pat called me back to tell me that Mom left just a few minutes after I drove away from their house. I felt badly for weeks, as I had been there for Dad's passing, but just missed Mom's. Even though I had said my goodbyes, it was still hard to know that it was my sister-in-law that had made my mother's passing easier, and not me. At least they had a long full life when they died, but Matty took having no grandparents hard. His cousins had their grandparents for longer than he had, so he felt gypped.

As for my friend, June, she had married Michael and had actually immigrated to Australia. She and Michael had two kids, now in their teens, too, and lived in the suburbs of Melbourne. I never thought June would move down under, but she loves it there and works at the University as the executive assistant to the Senior Vice-Principal for the school. I gather that's like the President of the University, but I don't usually talk to June about her work. We mostly talk about our kids, husbands, and what's going on in our lives. Michael has some research job at a firm in Melbourne, but I have no idea what he really does. Frankly, I don't really care. I don't get into Haldir's job with June, and she doesn't get wordy about her husband's work either. Haldir and I have gone down to visit June and Michael once, and June and Michael have made it back up to Canada once as well. It's such a long flight, that I think it's just a little more than we can handle for a couple of weeks at a time.

I've been trying to write a book about my adventure in Arda, but I just can't seem to get things quite right. My life there was so fantastical, that I keep thinking that people wouldn't believe a word I've written. Haldir is supportive, but I just can't get over my insecurities about what I experienced. I'm rewriting what I have so far, and making it into a fantasy, or else people really won't buy what happened. My editor at the online magazine is supportive of my foray into the real world of publishing, but it's one thing to write for a magazine, and quite another to write "fiction". As well, I'm not a spring chicken anymore, and I often wonder how my reception would be with the fantasy genre fans. Matty keeps telling me to write a script, because he knows the folks at SciFi would be interested in reading it, but I think I'm a little more comfortable with the book medium. Less chance of someone screwing up my work in the process of putting the work to paper.

One day last week, Haldir came up to me as I was doing the dinner dishes and wrapped his arms around my waist. He nuzzled my neck and kissed my cheek before he whispered in my ear, "Do you have any regrets?"

"What?" I asked, puzzled.

"Regrets. Do you have any?" he saw my blank look. "About us. Coming to Arda, and going home to Earth. Marrying me even though upon your death we will be separated forever?"

I had to think about that for a moment. "No. None. Even though you won't join me in the afterlife, I am glad I got to spend even the shortest time here with you. You are my soulmate."

Haldir hugged me closer to him. "Neither do I. I think finding you here was probably the best thing that could have ever happened to me. You have given me a life that I never knew existed. Thank you."

I stared out the window, thinking, as Haldir held me. "I guess that could be attributed to the probability factor. While it may've been improbable for you to come here and meet me, you did. That makes it probable, not improbable. Call it destiny or fate, but mathematically you had to come to me because that's what the math demanded."

Haldir tilted his head as he thought about what I said. "Yes, I think you are right. It was probable that I would find you. That math is very intelligent."

I turned to Haldir and kissed him deeply. "That's the probability factor for you."

I really don't regret anything. Haldir loves me and I love him. We have a great son, and family and friends who love us. It seemed only probable that my life would end up this way, now that I think of it.


End file.
